i was heavily inspired by rihanna's song 'te amo' and now we have this! i hope you enjoy!
VICTORIA
my mind went blank as i looked around the dimmed club, nothing but pure drunks and their sober friends taking care of them. everyone seems to be having fun though, that's what it's about in the end.
i sip my vodka tonic as i catch glimpses of different people trying to have fun in the club which, honestly, has such bad music playing. playing baby lullabies would be better than this.
i've lost ethan a long time ago. he found interest in some guy handing out the drinks so i let him be. he'll find me eventually, he's ethan.
being alone at any event gets boring. and the fact that music here is trash isn't making it any better. i decided to not let anything hold me back anymore and go to the dance floor and dance. better music may be on it's way, you never know.
leaving my half empty glass on the table, i strut to the dance floor and try to feel the music. lifting my arms up, swaying my hips, dancing to the rhythm as much as i can just to feel good.
one of the reasons i'm trying to have fun is because life has been hectic lately. it's non stop work, touring, interviews and it can get tiring pretty fast. also to try and break my habit of hooking up and having one night stands so often. i know the guys get really frustrated when i regret it the next day, telling me i should stop and i know better. they're right, but i don't want to admit it to them.
it's so pathetic, really. i'm at the club, dancing alone. even if ethan was here, he wouldn't dance. he says that he isn't a man of many moves which - okay, i guess.
maybe i should find someone to dance with? i don't have to bring them back home or go to theirs, as the others say i always do. they sure know how to criticize.
lifting my gaze to stare at the people's faces, no one catches my interest. they're either too drunk or are with a group of friends. i definitely don't want to invade like that.
going deeper into the centre of the dance floor is so out of my comfort zone, but i feel the buzz of alcohol i took not long ago giving me confidence to do so.
even though i'm bisexual, i'm not really searching for a male accomplice. most of the men here are drunk anyway and i'm not looking to get into that.
while i walk through the crowd of sweaty people, i hear a familiar song start to play. it's something by rihanna, but i can't really descipher what.
stopping in my tracks, i see her. i don't know who she is, but she's found herself in the same situation as i have. she's acting out on it diffrrently tho.
she's alone, just like i am, but she's having the time of her life. she doesn't care if anybody is around her or looking at her, she's leaving everything she's got on that dance floor.
it's evident she's having fun and it brings a smile to my face. it's like she's radiating this positive energy that i crave right now.
"taking a picture would really last longer, you know?!" she yells over the music and smiles, getting me out of my trance.
i stare at her for a couple of second and she chuckles at me, still moving her hips to the beat.
i shoot a small smile back and she looks me up and down, checking me out so obviously.
that's brave.
i walk up to her, following the rhythm of the same song that i now recognize as 'te amo'.
i get the courage to talk to her, getting as close to her as i possibly can.
i say in her ear, "you alone too?"
she smirks and gets close to me as well, "yeah. wanna dance?" she takes my hand, anticipating my answer.
"yeah." i say but it doesn't matter since she can't hear, instead she waits for me to nod my head.
i nod with a wide smile plastered over my face. i see her turn around, her back against my front.
she dances to the song and i can't help but bite my lower lip. she looks so good and she knows it.
"it's over. then she said 'te amo'." she sings and leans on me. taking my hands from behind her, she places them on her waist and i oblige.
"then she put her hand around me waist." she smiles while singing to me, her hands finding their place in my hair.
"i told her no, she cried 'te amo'.
i told her i'm not gon' run away.""but let me go. my soul is awry,
without asking why."she suddenly turns around and puts her hands around my neck. we're both slowly grinding on each other and i'm losing my mind. she's intoxicating, in the best fucking way.
"i said 'te amo'.
wish somebody'd tell me what she said.""don't it mean 'i love you'?"
she caresses my face while i pull her closer by her waist, loving the feeling going through my body.
"i think it means 'i love you'." she sings the line to me and i fit my face in the crook of her neck.
we sway our hips to the music together like that, her hands pulling at my hair lightly while my own create patterns on her waist.
"what do you say we get out of here?" she suggests to my ear and i lift my head to look at her.
she takes my love-drunk smile as a yes and pulls me to her side, trying to find the nearest exit.
did i come here to not sleep with someone? yes.
am i going to sleep with her? hell. yes.i shouldn't care what the others tell me, i'm a fucking adult and i can make my own decisions.
they can't find out about this one tho.
me
i'm headed homeme
are you gonna be alright?
sent 12:43ami know i'm lying, but i don' need him to lecture me right now. or ever, for that matter.
edgar
i'm gonna be just fineedgar
leave the door unlocked for me, thank youu
sent 12:44am