This Can't Be The End

Chapter 44

E n s l e e y    P o v:

It's been three days since I last saw Ryver, not that there's anything wrong about that, but reminders of the past threaten to unleash on a present I have thoroughly built.

It already has...

A small whisper of an echo reminds me.

So now as he is standing in my kitchen drinking coffee I had made him, he only arrived shortly before, I feel jittery excitement.

He on the other hand appears nervous.

"So uh I did something I probably shouldn't have," Ryver starts setting his mug on the counter.

"What did you do?" I ask when he doesn't elaborate.

"I got a tattoo," he says too quickly, and my eyes widen, I cover it up quickly.

He again doesn't say anything else, "of what?"

Instead of telling me, he lifts the sleeve of his hoodie to reveal the said tattoo.

The tattoo is almost to the middle of his arm, not too big but also big enough for you to be able to see it clearly.

The actual tattoo is what I didn't expect.

There are two small angel wings looming close together, in a dark green shading.

It's beautiful, but what I want to know is why?

Our relationship is only now ranking at two months.

"Ryver-"

"I was drunk by the way, but I don't regret it,"

I nod, how did he manage to get a tattoo drunk? Wouldn't the person doing the tattoo notice?

"Are you okay with it?"

Despite it all, I know the reason for the tattoo he calls me angel and angel wings.

Even if it is too soon, a big part of me doesn't care. He got a tattoo for me, I should be sacred, but surprisingly I'm not.

I guess we're both crazy.

I go over to him, and bunch up a part of his hoodie in my hand, before placing my lips on his.

Telling him without a single word how I feel.

The tension that previously was settled in him vanishes.

His hands go to my waist holding me tight to him.

We might both be insane, but at least we can be insane together.

*~*~*~*

Winter break passes by in a blur.

Me and Aunt Lilly spend our Christmas the same way we have been celebrating it for the last two years, we open presents on the couch, eat from one of our favourite restaurants, visit my parents, that part never fails to be difficult.

I always end up feeling like I have disappointed my mother, I know I have even if I don't want to admit it.

Who wouldn't when they have the mistakes I have and continually still do because it's their own personal cage that traps them in a hold that is difficult to resist?

Then after that, we wind down with some Christmas movies, to ease down.

That's always fun since we always make hot chocolate and cookies to enjoy while we binge.

Now of course back to the reality of things, school is back in session, and I won't lie, I find a sense of relief for the added normalcy.

Things are spiralling though I keep finding ways to hide it.

I'm sitting with Ryver at what I call the 'popular table' since no one sits here except the kids who are popular.

Daggers are being shot my way, by none other than Kiara, Melinda isn't here to join in the fun, who knows where she is.

I understand Melinda's distaste toward me, but why is Kiara always on that same path?

There are things in life that will always be an unsolved mystery. I'm guessing this is one of them.

I ignore her, and scroll through my Instagram feed to try and ignore the burning hole she's trying to create.

I stumble across a post that threatens to bring a rush of tears.

I hold them back of course, no matter how much it fucking kills me inside.

~~~~~~~

A u t h o r s     N o t e 

Thank you so much for reading!

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-R.E