And I'm sad...again

Struggle

Feelings

How can the world be flipped
How can you all of the sudden be skipped
You go from hating yourself
To putting everything on a shelf
The way that it falls
It's like death has stopped its calls
You never know when it's time
But you always find some way to say "i'm fine"
The biggest lies you tell
Are the ones you tell yourself
Crawling out from hell
You know you cannot tell
You've seen things you can't explain
Even though they cause you the most pain
You hold it deep within
Always letting the demons win
You try and stay away from hate
Yet it always seems to find its way
It burns itself in you mind
And sometimes its just as blind
You've lost your power
And sooner or later it'll all tower
You'll find the frame that holds the chain
That's keyed to your brain
And all you can feel is the pain
You let the tears fall one by one
Almost slow enough to grab that gun
You have so many scars
They can see them from the stars
You still keep the blade
Until one day you seem to be brave
You've kept that secret long enough
And still you can't seem to feel loved
You can't trust anyone
You can't trust yourself
The only thing you can trust is that bottle on the shelf
You've tried so many times to leave this place
And still you can't look in their face
You've told so many lies
You've even looked right in their eyes
How can you not be scared to die
There is so much pain in this life
That you'd rather just die
You hold the secrets of the past
And not once have they asked
You keep a smile on that face
Just incase they have enough to trace
You hold those tears deep inside
Close to wear the demons hide
You have played nice with the angels
But little did they know you have different angles
The demons play with fire that burns their wings away
Yet somehow they seem to stay
I've been a prisoner of my own head for too long
And now it's time to say it
So long

Never hide

I always thought i could outrun him
Everything i thought was so grim
I ran and crawled, fought stalled
I found my fight
Put them in the light
Stood up and screamed
Not what it seems
No matter how much i fought
There was always that thought
No matter how far i ran
He seemed like a hitman
Turned into superman
And disclosed like a dead man
He was a soldier the one who lost himself
The one who wanted to kill himself
He went from a hero to the villian
Day and night he wouldnt go down without a fight
We struggled and cried
Die on the inside
But the only thing he would do was hide
The blood rushing through my veins
I knew that he was help down by all those chains
Trying to break free from the pain
But when you cant you have to face the remains
The remains of your worth
The ones your mama taught from birth
Who would never let you leave this earth
He looked up in awestruck dignity
This man looked at us so differently
No more hostility
And no more feeling guilty
He broke from the weights that held so tight
His face looked so bright
He finally saw the daylight
He beat his demons
He finally found his reason
A reason for not leaving
He help on to the light and never let her out of sight
Sooner or later he knows he might
But the thought is finally not a red light
He is finally free