20-year-old Assyria Adina Stone yearned for peace but favored excitement. She was in a lane of her own. Discovering herself. Physically, she was on earth, but mentally, she was living through her own fantasy. She was a young woman and wanted to expl...
"So... yuh gay now?" Zaire quizzed, glancing at Assyria momentarily as he sat at his desk rolling a blunt.
She had popped over his apartment around nine the following morning. While she was exploring the world when she was supposed to be figuring out her plans for school, Zaire decided to rent an apartment ten minutes from his father's house. One reason was that he was still trying not to like Dominique although he knew she was good for his father. She was just five years younger and always wanted to know how his day was. Zaire hated that, it made him feel as if she were being fake or trying too hard.
Dominique was a great woman. Gorgeous as hell and brown skin, the way his father liked his women. At first, Zaire thought that his father was only with her because she shared the same complexion as his mom but then he realized that his father was actually into her. She was a dentist and owned her practice. The other reason why Zaire got his own temporary space until he finished school, was because he knew he couldn't bring any company over when he needed to plus, he loved him some good-ass weed.
Sporting an all-black sweater-style fitted dress that had the back exposed and a slit on the left side, Assyria had her hair in a twist-out and rocked a few of her crystal necklaces. She had combat boots on her small feet as she laid across Zaire's sofa. One foot on the top, the other hovering over the cushion as she stared at his ceiling.
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She was quiet for a while and Zaire gave her that time as he prepped his morning blunt. The two's relationship evolved from supposed-to-be family-not-so-family into best friends. There was a bit of awkwardness between the two for a vowed to never be spoken about again, reason but they got each other. Understood one another.
"I'm not... but," she paused, hands stretched upward before she turned her head in his direction, "It did feel different."
Zaire looked over at her, "Dis happened in Cali?"
"Yeah," she returned her gaze to the ceiling.
Zaire resumed focusing on his blunt. A few minutes went by and he joined her in the living room as he sparked the blunt.
Assyria continued staring at the ceiling then exhaled. A slow long breath in. A slow long breath out. "I'm not gay."
"K," Zaire chuckled, "Don't mek a difference fi mi, dah yo business."
Assyria became offended but couldn't understand why. "If you don't want to listen to me, don't pretend like you care."
Zaire's forehead wrinkled and he paused mid puff, "Huh?"
"Nothing," she closed her eyes, "I'm not gay," she mumbled.
"Yuh curious?" he queried.
Assyria shrugged, "It just happened..."
Zaire removed the blunt from his lips and stared at her through hooded lids, "Explain."
After spending thirty minutes giving him the details of her off-putting encounter, Assyria kept her eyes on the ceiling a little nervous about his opinion and how he would view her now.
Zaire sat there with an unreadable expression on his face. He wanted to blame it on the weed but he haven't gotten a chance to enjoy it the way he wanted because he was too consumed with dissecting the story. He had to have said what the fuck? over a hundred times under his breath but damn, this was a what the fuck, moment.
"So..." he paused, cleared his throat a few times then leaned forward, "Yuh do realize wah dah wuz right?"
Assyria glanced at him, "I consented," she said.
"Sy..." he slid forward some, "A grown-ass woman tricked yuh into some nasty shit... all bets were off after dah."
"Well..." she pursed her lips then shook her head, "never mind."
"Seh it."
"I just..." she sighed, "I wanted to forget about what happened... I wanted to have fun."
Zaire shook his head, relit his blunt, and slid back, "Yuh need to tell yur parents," he spoke with a mouthful of smoke.
"So they can look at me differently? I knew what I was doing... I don't have time to hear them judging me or calling me a demon seed."
Zaire sighed and stared ahead. He knew what she meant but couldn't understand why she would think her parents would judge her.
"I just wanted to try it," her voice softened, "I liked it but it doesn't make me gay... I'm not," she regretfully shook her head.
Zaire stared at her for a while and watched as she kept wiping her face. "Sy."
"I'm not," she began to cry.
"Lawd," he placed the blunt down and stood. Grabbing her hand, he pulled her toward him as he sat at the far end of the sofa, "Are yuh confused?"
"Yeah," she mumbled, wiping her face. "I just wanted to have fun."
"And dah OK," he paused briefly, "How often were yuh messing with her?"
"A few weeks until I started feeling... weird."
He nodded, "Yur attracted to gyals and guys, nutten wrong wit dah."
"No..." she sat up and wiped her face, "I'm just... having sex with women just made me feel safer."
Zaire stared at her confused, "Come again?"
Assyria stared at his carpet, "After... I'm just scared to feel a penis inside of me."
Sliding forward, Zaire turned his body toward her and placed one arm over the sofa, "Yur scared of dick?"
"Don't say it like dat," she busted out laughing.
"Wah yuh waah mi fi seh?" he grinned, "Yuh scared of a dick entering yuh but yuh got dah dildo in yo drawer."
Assyria pushed him back, "It's different."
"How?" he laughed, "Yuh got mi confused now," he chuckled.
"It just is," she shrugged.
"So when yuh were wit di gyal... shi never used a toy?"
"Just on tha' other girl."
Zaire's eyes lingered on hers for a moment, "Yuh watched?"
"Yeah..." she pulled her knees into her, "I'm not gay... I just wanted to try something different."
"Cool," he shrugged, "When's di last time yuh messed with a gyal?"
"I talk to someone here," she rubbed her forehead, "It's... complicated. When I get flashbacks, I just watch a lot of porn to help."
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