1919
It's been four months since my elder brothers got back from the war and they've changed.
Ada and Aunt Pol said they'd be different but I didn't realise just how different they would be.
Arthur says the voices in his head are overwhelming. And John has so many kids (only four but still). He's changed. Not the same.
Tommy is closed off, doesn't talk much. He doesn't ask for hugs but I know he needs them. They all have nightmares, sometimes they wake up screaming and Ada would run to their rooms. She'd tell Finn and me to stay in bed whilst she handled it.
I felt bad for them.
I was currently eating toast in the kitchen. I ate silently as I tapped my fingers against the table. I looked around the room and a cold air flew through and I shivered.
"Ten minutes." Finn said from beside me, eating the same thing as me. We were both now ten years old.
"Alright," I finished then got up to say bye to Polly. "Meet you back here in ten." He nodded.
Once I reached the betting den, I sped over to her. She sat on a chair, counting money.
"See you later, Polly." I hugged her from behind. My arms snook around her shoulders and clasped together at the base of her neck. My fingers then tapped a rhythm on her collar bone.
"Don't be home late, Mae." She gently removed my hands from around her neck and patted them thoughtfully. Poll spared me a glance as well.
I sighed. I knew what she meant. After school, before the war ended, I'd stay out for a little while. Even though I was hopelessly nine, I was quite mischievous when I wanted to be. And now, still. I can't help it though, it's as if some impulse comes over me and I automatically give in.
"Yeah." I skipped back to Finn.
-
We made it to school on time but I didn't want to be punctual. I preferred being a little tardy and imperfect. I didn't want to be like the chavy girls in school. Or the nerdy ones for that matter but I'll admit, I am a bit smart.
Smarter than Finn.
Finn is dumb, so is John, but they're both my best friends.
The bell rung and me and my brother ran to hide in the bathrooms. No one ever came into these specific ones because they were really dirty and hidden in a corner of the school.
He brought out the cigarette we stole, as well as some matches. A burst of adrenaline spiraled through me seeing the cigarette.
"You know Poll will have our heads when she finds out about this." He said weary of our next actions.
I shrugged, "If she finds out, plus who cares? You only live once and everyone does it." I took it from his hand, fitting it between my lips like Tommy does and snatched the matches too.
I brought the lit match to the other end of the cigarette, lighting it. I swiftly shook the flame out after.
I leaned back against the wall, taking a long drag and exhaling. I looked over towards my twin, his face showing a look of jealousy. I could tell he wanted to try.
"Give it here," he plucked it from my fingers, copying what I did seconds before.
I smirked at his expression, his mood brightening instantly. "Relaxing, right?" I nudged him. The feeling it gave me eased my racing thoughts.
He looked at me, "Oh yes." I giggled slightly. He wasn't lying, it was very calming. The nicotine entering your lungs, encasing your nerves and making your problems disappear without a second thought; it gave peace of mind.
-
The day went on as normal, boring, and we managed to get home twenty minutes late. Not on purpose.
Walking through the front door, we came upon Arthur sitting on a chair at the table and Aunt Poll at the stove. I slammed the door, frightening poor Polly with the sound it made. I grimaced and mouthed 'sorry'.
She had a scowl on her face, "Where were you and why is Mae covered in mud?" She rushed to me after seeing my cut lip and reddened knuckles. I shrugged.
"Fuckin' snobby gits, I tell you." I looked away, scoffing. Polly slapped me upside the head. Ow.
"I ought to wash your mouth out." She sighed as Arthur bellowed out a laugh at my choice of words.
She pinched the bridge of her nose, "What on God's good earth happened, young lady?" It was my turn to sigh. Finn's face turned sour and I got ready for his version of the story. I was too tired from today's events to explain and he knew it.
He took a deep breath, "She beat up some kids that were botherin' us." I ducked from Polly's arm on my shoulder and made a break for the stairs after seeing my aunt's glare and brother's raised brows.
"Mae! Get back 'ere, now!" I froze. Her nose flared with anger. I was in deep shit and I knew that if I continued running, I wouldn't be able to walk at all for a week.
Getting whacked on the behind hurts.
I ever so slowly turned on my heel, dread creeping up my spine at the passing seconds. I weakly smiled at Polly, waving my hand in a pathetic attempt to be let off.
"Here." She says. Finn gives me a sorry look but I know he'll tease me later about this. And Arthur just sits there, tea on the table, watching me with curious eyes. He hasn't really seen me in trouble before, not since they came back. And he hasn't seen me getting scolded by Polly before.
Not since I was six, and what can a six year old do that's so bad it needs a scolding?
Not much.
My walk of shame stops when I reach the table again. I cast my eyes downward as Polly speaks.
"I had hoped you learned your lesson by now, I don't have time for your silly games. Tommy will deal with you." She brings out her metal compartment for her smokes and lights one up.
I watch with beady eyes, jealous. I finally know the feeling it gives you. I know why she has them so often, same with everyone. Calm. Relief.
"What's Tommy goin' to do?" I question, not intimadated by the supposed threat. Tommy was my brother, he wasn't going to do much.
The awkward atmosphere had me bouncing off of the walls, literally, I couldn't keep still. I was pacing the room, bitting my nails.
"Oh Tommy, he'll do something with ya." Arthur shook his head as if knowing what will happen to me. I scoffed.
"Yeah right," I murmered as I slumped down next to my eldest brother, snatching his half finished tea. I gulped down the last of it and smirked at his shocked face.
"That was mine!" He went for me, probably to tickle me but I ran around to the other side of the table. I grabbed Finn and we ran into the betting den.
"Oi! Out of there!" I think Arthur shouted but I didn't find it in me to care.
-
It was now the next day and Finn and I were seated by the table, secretly sharing a smoke. The warmth of the fireplace infront of us produced enough heat for our liking.
"Finn, stop worrying about when they find out. It's a matter of if," I groaned at his constant worries and blabbering. He needed to get a grip sometimes, I swear.
He sighed, "Mae, we both know we shouldn't really be doing this. Tom will have us in for it."
"Whatever," I sighed, pulling a thread of wool from the tattered, old pair of troussers John lent me.
The front door opened and closed indicating that someone was home. I quickly snatched the smoke off of Finn and chucked it in the open fire.
"Finn?" It was Tom.
He walked to us, "Arthur's mad as hell," Finn stated as I continued to fiddle with the stray thread.
Tommy bent down to retrieve the shared cigarette that had fallen from the fire.
"What does a ten year old know about hell, ay?" He flicked Finn's nose with his cap, giving me a glance.
"I'm eleven Sunday!" He exclaims. I gasp.
"We're eleven Sunday!" I corrected him, punching his arm harder than I intended.
Tommy breathed a chuckle at the both of us. He pointed a finger at me. "I need a chat with you, Mae." He gave me a look but I didn't see the harm in it.
He walked back and opened the double doors to the betting den. A loud bustling reached my ears and when I saw John, I ran to him.
I hugged his waist, his arms immeditately enclosing around me. "John! It's loud in here." I burried my face in his chest, my hazel coloured hair hiding me. It felt like a barrier between me and the noise.
"Mae, I'm busy right now." He hurridly but gently removed my arms from around him and jogged down to Tommy.
"Tommy! Tommy! Tommy, look at the book. Just look." He lifted up, what was probably a record book of bettings, and showed our brother.
"Tommy!" Arthur shouted from outside his office.
"All on Monaghan Boy." John continued.
"Tommy! Get in here, now!" Okay Arthur needs to calm down if he doesn't want his face to turn bright red.
When they were out of sight, I returned to John. "Arthur's face looks like a tomato!" I giggled, watching him take a quick drag from his cig.
He looked down at me, "He sure did." He patted my head and gave me a little push on my back. "Go back to Finn," I looked at him confused.
"You said it youself, it's too loud in here so go on." He nodded his head in the direction of our part of the joined houses.
"But John!" I whinned. The seriousness in his eyes was enough to send me away. I guess he had too much work going on for him to handle me too.
-
I used a lot of 'thought' in that chapter. Opps.
Hope you liked my first chapter of this fanfic.
1734 words
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