After Batakrishna had decided to cut open his heart to Shetukala the next day, he heard her scream. What he had thought ,her scream would be due to some lizard or cockroach dawdling in the corners , but when he actually reached to her, the scene infront of him pulled the rug from under his feet.
Destiny has this strange habit of not letting things happen according to a man's will, that's why it's the most cursed as well as most thanked thing in the world.
Shetukala's palms were bleeding as she was continuously hitting the the imported full length , three panel mirror in the closet room, with her fists breaking it into pieces The pointed shards of the mirror were piercing her skin, as the the scarlet drops stained the white marble of the floor.
"No! No! No! Don't look. Don't look. Don't...don't..." She screamed as she smashed the mirror into as many pieces as she could, along with her blue glass bangles. breaking and falling on the floor in pieces while some punctured her skin drawing blood from her wrists.
"Shetu! What are you doing? Leave it. Leave it , I said." He held her from behind wrapping his arm around her shoulders, but she jumped from his hold using all her might in a withdrawal reflex as if his touch burned her skin.
She took a shard of mirror and pointed towards him. " Don't you dare touch me.....or....or... I'll kill you....". She said, her voice rising an octave. She looked at herself , half clothed and then at at his bare torso in horror. "What did you do to me? What did you do to me? Where are my clothes? What did you do to me? " She screamed like a banshee, looking here and there and then crouched in the corner trying to hide her half naked form.
Batakrishna was dumbfounded to see her reaction. She was absolutely fine just five minutes ago, and she was now a completely different person.
Was she hallucinating?
"Shetu! What happened? Why are you---" He moved towards her and touched her bare shoulders , only to be hit by the mirror shard on his forehead, and led out a painful groan . He clutched his forehead in pain.
"I told you ... Don't.....Don't come near me. Don't .... Don't..... I'll kill you.... I..." She spluttered.
"Shetu! What did you do?" He touched his forehead and looked at his fingers stained with his blood. The gash was deep enough to draw blood but he least cared about it in that moment.
"I told you, not to come to me. I will .... I will kill you. Don't you dare come to me. I'm saying, I'm saying...." She said trying to hide in the corner , mumbling to herself.
Seeing her getting distracted, he gripped her wrist forcefully , not giving her a chance to withdraw her hand and threw the mirror piece away.
"NOOOOOO!!!" As soon as the mirror piece was snatched from her, her demeanor completely changed from a threatening person to a helpless one. She joined her bleeding hands and fell on the floor curling in a foetal position, pleading and whimpering.
"Please don't do anything to me. Please.... Please.... I beg you." She hid her face in her elbows and shouted in begging tone. "Please .....I won't do it again. Please leave me...please."
He crouched beside her , touching her arm, but she flinched away from his touch. He withdrew his arm back and cooed in her ear, " okay, okay . I won't touch you . You need not fear okay. " He stood up and took out a shawl from the closet and covered her upper body with it. " See , now you are covered. Shetu! What happened ? Tell me. Please. "
She lifted her head and looked at him. Her eyes were red and swollen with all the crying, and lips trembling . The Kohl made black trails of tears on her cheeks, making her look so pitiful. Her red bindi smudged like an amateur stroke. His heart clenched seeing her like this. " Please don't do this to me..... Please..... I'm sorry. I'm So-sorry... sorry." She joined her hands entreating as her eyes cried more fresh tears. "Please ....don't ....dont....do this to me. I beg you...." She sobbed in between her words.
Her breaths became ragged and she started gasping for air. She felt as if her chest constricted and each breath was like a deadly war. The room felt too small , the walls seemed to be shifting closer and closer as if going to crush her in between them , making her feel claustrophobic. She started hyperventilating, making him panick. He bent on her still trying not to touch her.
"Shetu! Shetu! Listen! What happened? Don't breathe so fast. Listen... " He patted her cheeks, when she didn't respond. He pulled her upper body in his grasp, and patted her cheeks repeatedly. She still feebly struggled to break his clasp but his hold was quite tight.
Her lips moved in a motion, but no voice came out. He aligned his ear to her lips to listen as she whispered , " K-Krishna.... Please come .... Come back.... I need you.... Please...." before collapsing in his arms. As soon as the words reached his ears, his blood froze.
He looked at her alarmed and patted her cheeks, "Shetu! Shetu! What did you say? You mean Batakrishna? Batakrishna right? Not krishna? My name is not krishna okay. You meant batakrishna right, Shetu! Answer me dammit! Shetu! Wake up." But she laid limp in his arms, her hands bleeding , staining the white shawl wrapped around her.
Batakrishna's eyes dripped fat tears as he sat dumbfound hugging her to his chest , his face ashen and as pale as a ghost. "No! No! This can't be hers. Many people ,many people had called me krishna at times. Nothing new. She might have said my name in short form. This can't be her. Tell me , you are not her, right." He whispered to himself shaking his head, sitting on the floor.
He cradled her frame in his lap and took her palm in his hands , removing the mirror shards and bangle pieces . He looked at her and shook her vigorously. " You are not her, right? Tell me. Wake up. Scream at me and tell me that you are not her. You are.... You are my shetu. Nothing happened to you. Nothing!! I won't let anything happen to you."
He cried and caressed her hair smearing their mixed blood on her forehead and hairline unknowingly, and hugged her again to his chest. " I won't let anything happen to you, Shona. I love you so , so much. More than my life. Please tell me once that you are not her. Please...." He cried.
He checked her vitals and pupils and heaved a sigh of relief. She just blacked out.
Bracing his thoughts and fears , he lifted her up and took her to the washroom.
He sat her on the washbasin counter and holding her frame with one hand, her head lolling on his chest . He cleaned the blood on her hand with antiseptic, and dressed her injuries after applying butterfly stitches. Removing her shawl a bit, to uncover her shoulder, he gave a tetanus shot to her.
No matter , how much he tried , her words kept ringing in his ears like a never ending beep sound, making his head hurt. He didn't want to go into the dark waters, but his inquisitive mind kept wandering to the signs she might have given in the past few days.
Wheels started spinning in his mind as scattered dots danced in front of his eyes making a gortesque figure too ugly to be seen. And too hurtful to imagine her in that scenario.
She could not be her. She could not be her.
He chanted the same thing in his mind, as he brought her to the bed and laid her on it. He unclasped her brassiere and removed it, from below the shawl. He held her in his arms , whispering sweet mothereses in her ear. It was hard to decipher whom he was consoling , himself or her.
He couldn't wait till morning, he needed his answers now. To hell with code of conduct, he needed to know right now. He shifted away from her , but she snuggled more into him clenching his hand beneath her cheek.
"Shetu! I'll come in sometime. Okay." He whispered in her ear and tried to remove her hold from his hand, but she mumbled something incoherent and snuggled more into him.
