ASH AND FIRE

9 - Pity

ASH

I awoke to a sound I've heard countless times that it didn't bother me anymore. Azel snoring.

Groaning, I lifted my head from the bed which was sweat slicked as was my neck. That same vision or whatever it was from the seer crept into my dreams. Darkness, that same overwhelming darkness. It seemed to reach out for me and recoiled when I flinched feeling it's cold touch.

Whatever it was, I didn't appreciate it. Not when it tired me out and I needed my strength if I was ever going to face father and go back to my own life.

Side stepping around Azels large sleeping form, I clustered myself into the bathroom and grabbed ahold of the sides of the stained sink. I glanced up at the mirror, a tiny one with a small crack beginning to form from the left bottom corner. "You can do this. Whatever he throws at you, you can take it. You've come so far to lose now. Be the fucking commander you were born to be."

I stared at myself, at my messy white hair which fell around me, at my icy coloured eyes and knew now that if I wanted something I had to fight for it.

Whilst Azel was asleep I quickly pulled on a T-shirt, tucking it loosely into my trousers, before pulling my hair back into a ponytail. Elle would always make more of an effort just like I wouldn't. It's not that I couldn't, it's the fact that when I do see father, I want to look as much of a disappointment that I can.

Seeing his lips thin out in a deep scowl pleased me to no extent.

Unhurriedly, I made my way down the tight staircase, and it was now I felt my bones aching once more. A dull thud started in my back, travelling down to my knees. I swiped the vial of vipers venom from my pocket and chugged down a few sips, licking my lips clean of the bitter liquid.

Rounding the corner, I tucked the vial back into my pocket and smiled at seeing Tahul chatting to another older male. They both immediately stopped their chatter with the unknown male walking away, waving goodbye to Tahul.

Tahul looked my way and it wasn't how he looked at me when he first met me. No. This time his gaze seemed bewildered and fearful. "I'm so sorry. If-if I had known you were royalty I would have given you a better room. Please take these." He fumbled, plucking a set of keys from a little box. He dangled them in the air for me.

Well shit. There goes my chance at being ordinary.

"Please I'm not royalty. Don't treat me like I am." I spoke knotting my brows unintentionally. Royal blood may run in my veins but I was never brought up as such.

Tahul blinked in surprise, slowly dropping his hand down to his side. I hated being formally recognised and treated differently. I was my fathers biggest mistake but fuck him too.

Something flashed in Tahuls eyes, a mixture of shock and empathy even. Maybe he understood why a Princess didn't want her title.

Not giving him time to respond or to pity me, I pushed the heavy front door open and was met with sunshine and heat. The kind that kissed your skin, wanting to permeate deeper. I let it because I needed a distraction.

My walk was short lived when I spotted the Kings males, their golden armour glinting like they were encrusted with millions of diamonds. They watched me, noting how I purposely ignored them. But sooner or later they would apprehended me, forcing me to see father.

I suppose I was grateful that father didn't make me bow at his feet although I have done that plenty of times when his dominance overpowered me, another pathetic part of me giving in to the male. Another reason I shouldn't be commander.

Females walked around at this time of day I gathered. Getting food and supplies, ready for the day. They kept their heads down, some having hoods and capes across their backs.