"Mr. Schuester, I have an announcement. I've selected the perfect moving ballad for Finn and I to sing to launch our performance at Sectionals." Rachel stands when Mr. Schue walks in. "Me first. Two things. First, our competition at Sectionals are your classic stool choirs. Great voices, but they don't move. Now if we're gonna beat them, we need to do what they can't. Dance. Which is why I've decided to feature Brittany and Mike Chang's sweet moves in our performance." Mr. Schue says. Venus reaches down and shakes Mike.
"Wait, they're gonna dance in front of me while I sing my solo?" Rachel asks. "You're not getting a solo for this competition Rachel." Mr. Schue corrects. "Finally! So what song do I get to sing?" Mercedes asks from beside Artie. "I was thinking that the winners of our duets competition would take the leads." Mr. Schue says, pointing at Venus and Sam. Sam and Venus look at eachother with wide, excited eyes. "Barney and Betty?! Wait a-a-are are you trying to throw this?" Rachel asks Mr. Schue. "Hey! You know, you can be such a-a...a bitch!" Venus yells at her. Everyone looks at her with shock, them never hearing her say that word before. As soon as she says it, she covers her mouth with horror, shocked at herself.
"Okay, listen, I have talked the talk about everyone in here feeling special for over a year now, but frankly I haven't walked the walk. I mean, we have got a lot of talent here, and I'm gonna highlight it," Mr. Schue says, bringing the attention away from Venus. "Do something!" Rachel whispers to Finn. "Look, I'm all for... pumping up the team, making everyone feel special, but that's for practice. You don't take the star quarterback out before the big game," Finn says. "Yeah," Rachel agrees. "Easy to say when you're the star quarterback," Tina tells him. "This isn't just about me, this is about the team," Finn tells them. "You are such a hypocrite," Santana says from beside Venus.
"Oh, like you even know what that means," Rachel says, turning to look at Santana. "It means that your boyfriend is full of crap, hobbit!" Santana yells at her. "You know what? Ever since the wedding you've been up my butt and I am sick of it!" Rachel yells right back at her, standing up. "C'mon Rachel, she's not worth it," Finn says in a hushed voice. "Oh really? Cuz that's not what you thought last year in that motel room," Santana says to Finn, then turns to Rachel, "That's right Yentl, your sweetheart? He's been lying to you, cuz he and I totally got it on last year."
"Okay enough already!..." Mr. Schue says, as everyone goes silent, "No more conversations about this, or-or anything! This is our plan for Sectionals, and that is that. Mike, Brittany, c'mon up, let's start choreographing."
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"Where's Puck? I haven't seen him since yesterday and I need him to get me a churro," Santana asks from the back of the room. "My guess is he'd rather quit Glee Club than lose Sectionals and I can't blame him. Our set's gon' be real light on the Mercedes." Mercedes says from the front row. " I'm telling you, if the Warblers win Sectionals, it's only because we gave them Kurt. We should not clap" Tina tells them. "You guys are being so rude," Venus says from beside Sam. "If we lose, we should throw possums." Brittany adds.
Rachel walks in with her arms crossed and duck tape on her face. When Venus sees her she groans and puts her head on Sam's shoulder. "Rachel, what are you doing?" Mr. Schue asks her. "I'm not doing anything. You've silenced my talents, I'm merely protesting. My talents are wasted in this club. My star shines too bright and I think you're threatened by it." Rachel says, pulling the duck tape off and on.
Mr. Schue slams his papers onto the piano in frustration. "Take that off! I'm tired of this Rachel! You have a terrible attitude, you're a lousy sport, and it is not okay anymore!" He screams loudly, shocking everyone. Venus holds on to Sam tightly, shaking. "Well I'm upset! I'm furious about this, about a couple of things actually!" Rachel says as she stands up. "I'm sorry you're disappointed, but you know, you could also make the choice to be happy, that we're a part of a glee club that is bursting at the seams with talent. There's an awful lot of 'me' talk going around. 'What's in it for me?' 'What solo am I gonna sing?' Now, when we go to Sectionals, we're gonna be good sports. We'll cheer on the Hipsters, we'll cheer on Kurt and the Warblers, and if they win we will congratulate them, because that's who we are." Mr. Schue says.
"Dude, where have you been?" Arties voice grabs the Glee Club's attention and they all look towards the door. Puck walks in, looking disheveled, Lauren Zises by him. "I found him in a porta potty." Lauren explains. "I was tryna find Kurt's replacement for Sectionals. I was trapped in that porta potty for twenty four hours. So I asked her if she wanted to join," He tells them. Santana looks at him grossed out. "I have to say, she kinda rocked my world." He finishes. "Okay guys, um, well, looks like we're back in business. Let's all welcome our newest member, Ms. Lauren Zizes!" Mr. Schue says.
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Venus was sitting in Arties lap at his locker, when Tina walks up to them. "We have a big problem," Tina says, directing her words towards Artie. "Is the problem your outfit? Because you look like a cheerleader zombie corpse." Artie says as Venus reaches into his locker to grab his books for him. "I have no choice, Mike Chang likes cheerleaders. You of all people should know. He's having an affair with Brittany." Tina informs them. "What?! You crazy." Artie tells her. "Yes, very crazy," Venus adds on. "You haven't noticed her ignoring you lately?" Tina asks. "Not really, it's shark week." He says, Venus nodding along. "They're inseparable!" Tina continues.
"They're doing a number together at Sectionals. They've been rehearsing" Artie tells her. "Really? Just rehearsing? Exhibit A, I kissed him and it tasted like Lip Smackers. Do you know who wears Lip Smackers? Brittany." Tina says. "And she doesn't mind sharing. I love borrowing her Lip Smackers. It's like candy for your lips." Artie says. "Ooo I love her Lip Smackers!" Venus says. "Don't be naïve Artie. She's a cheerleader, he's a football player. You and I never had a chance at either of them." Tina says as she walks off. Artie frowns at Venus, "Do you think so?" He asks her. "No. I know Mike and Brittany. They would never do that." She reassures him, kissing his cheek. "Okay," He says as he wheels them down the hall.
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As Venus was walking down the halls of the building they were holding sectionals at, she bumps into someone. "Oh I'm so sorry," She quickly apologies. "It's okay!" The someone she ran into, a guy with a uniform on, says. "I'm Blaine," He says, reaching his hand out. "I'm Venus," She responds, shaking his hand. "I love your name," Blaine says. "Thank you," She responds shyly. "What choir are you from?" Blaine asks. "Um, New Directions," She answers. "You?" She questions. "The Warblers," He responds. "Cool," She tells him. "Well, I got to go, see you around?" Blaine asks. Venus nods her head, "Goodbye Blaine Warbler," She tells him. "Goodbye Venus," He says, walking down the hall.
Venus walks to the commons when she sees Sam waiting for her. He grabs her hand and walks into the auditorium, finding their seats. She watches the Hipsters perform and she remembers what Puck said. She leans over and taps his leg, waiting for him to look at her. When he does, she pats the air and makes an explosion with her hands. He remembers what she's talking about and laughs. The Warblers come on next and she sees Kurt and Blaine, she waves at them when they look her way.
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"These costumes are causing some unmentionable chafing," Lauren says next to Puck. "Nowhere to run, from me, or your lies. I hope they judge us on dancing and adultery because your aces at both of them," Artie says to Brittany. "I don't understand how you found out. I am so stupid, I can't believe I did it, I'm, I've never felt more awful about anything in my life." Brittany tells Artie.
"What's Artie all worked up about?" Mike asks Tina. "You are such a jerk," She replies. "You told Kurt?!" Rachel yells at Finn as she storms in. "I don't remember, maybe," He tells her. "About Finn and Santana? No I think I told him," Mercedes says. "Who told you?" Rachel asks Quinn. "Me? I think Brittany told me. Over maybe it was Puck," Quinn says. "Yeah it was me," Puck replies. "Did you know?" Rachel asks Venus. "Finn told me," Venus says, raising her hands in a defensive order. "Everybody knew about this but me?!" Rachel asks. "Pretty much," Tina says. "Nobody tells you anything because, A, you're a blabbermouth, and B, we just pretend to like you," Santana says.
"That's not true, I kinda like her," Puck says. "Look, Rachel, when this all happened, you were dating another guy. So you don't really have a right to be pissed at me about it okay? And fine, I shouldn't have lied about it but, to be honest, that isn't what you care about. You care about the Santana of it all," Finn tells her. "Oh who are you right now?!" Rachel asks. "Best green room ever." Lauren says. "You know what? You guys are gonna have to find someone else to mindlessly harmonize in the background because I'm not going on stage with him!" Rachel says as she points at Finn, and Mr. Schue walks in. "Make that two subs. I'm not going out there with Brittany." Artie says from beside Mercedes. "Me either!" Tina agrees.
"Enough! Listen to yourselves! I am ashamed of you. Think back to where you were this time last year. In this room, no set list, no choreography, no chance in Hell of winning. But you did win, because you did it together. Look, I don't care if you guys hate each other, all I want is for you guys to go out there, and sing together. Get up there, and for six minutes remind yourselves that you're not alone," Mr. Schue says. "Alright! Show time!"
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Sam is smiling at Venus with adoration. "What?" Venus asks him. "You look beautiful," He tells her. Venus places her hand on his cheek, and leans in, "You look beautiful too, Sam-I-Am." She rests her head on his before pulling away, smiling big at him. "Let's go win this," She tells him. She smiles at him one more time, before walking over to her curtain, watching him leave as the music starts.
(I've Had) The Time Of My Life - Venus - Sam - New Directions
Valerie - Santana
The three choirs all stand together, waiting in anticipation. "And now, this year's head judge, associate director of the Ohio Department of Motor Vehicles, Mister Pete Sznowski," The announcer says.
"Thank you, and thank you to all the groups who performed here today, we all had a serious, good time. You know what else, is a serious good time? Taking two minutes to save a life by filling out an organ donor card, because it's never too late to donate. Drumroll please. In third place, the Hipsters! Thank you, drive carefully. And now, the winner of this year's west central Sectionals is... it's a tie. Congratulations! You're all going to the Regionals!" Pete says. Venus reaches down and hugs Artie, overcome with joy that they get to go on.
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"Congratulations guys! It wasn't pretty but we're moving on," Mr. Schue says, walking in with the trophy. Everyone is standing around the piano and they begin to cheer loudly. "And I for one, am gonna be happy to have Regionals and Nationals to focus on," He finishes. "Mr. Schue, we heard the news about Ms. Pillsbury marrying the finest dentist alive," Santana says. "It's alright, we don't need to talk about it. Now, I know we've had our um, our dramas this week, but our family is back in a happy place, and I think we should celebrate, the best way we know how. Rachel, so how would you like to solo?" Mr. Schue asks.
"Thanks but um, I don't really feel like a solo right now. I'd like to defer it to this week's two unsung heroes, Mercedes and Tina," Rachel says. "Well, don't have to ask me twice." Mercedes says.
Dog Days Are Over - Mercedes - Tina
