In my dream last night, I saw a glimpse of another universe
In that universe, I met you
We were falling in love instead of falling silent
I, with the way you held me in your arms
and you, with the way I called your name and played with your hands
In that universe, we liked the same songs and squealed together in excitement each time a new one could be added to the list
You would pick a song and play it on the piano
I would sing along and you would too, eventually
We would then spend the rest of the week subconsciously humming its chorus
under our breaths, at work
thinking of each other and ocassionally spacing out with a little smile, in hopes of the weekend coming a bit faster
Because we both know that on Saturdays, I would stay over
We would order delivery and watch a shitty show together because your friend told you it was good
We would laugh at how ridiculous everything is and how it would be better if we had written it instead
But honestly, was it that bad if the conversation was that good?
Midway through, I'd put my head on your shoulder and start talking about life
In this other universe, such thing was possible
We were way past the oohs and ahhs, and nods and blank stares
We could sit there in silence and know that we were having a deep conversation in our heads
but we would still talk because we liked each other's voices
Then we would kiss in a heartbeat because it felt right, unlike how it did right here
Right then, time would seem to momentarily stop
and we would know at that moment, that we would always have each other no matter what the world threw at us
In this other universe,
I wrote more poems about you
and you crafted the best playlists
to help me sleep better at night
Our friends knew we were close, except this time it was true and I felt it too
You actually listened to my stories and I actually listened to your rants
You stopped thinking I was boring
and I stopped thinking you were too tempramental for your own good
I was much less awkward
and you were much less of a liar
Life was much more colorful, and we were much less tired
because we settled for one another instead of wandering around looking for the one
or the thrills
Tell me, would you live in that other universe?
One where we belonged, when we would never have?
I wouldn't know
Because love didn't choose us,
and we know better than to give us a try
But I can't help but wonder if such reality was possible
had we both fallen for each other against all odds
Jakarta, 18 November 2022
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