Chapter 31 Part 2

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That night, I performed the second of a two-show set in Vegas. It went by as most concerts do, in a blur of up-tempo beats, blinding lights, and frenetic dancing. The Alek-sized hole stage right formed its own negative presence. When the crowd began to chant "Wolf, wolf!" I smiled and told them for the wellbeing of the wolf, she wouldn't be making an appearance tonight.

The audience wailed in protest. Every part of me ached, my wolf persona clawing below my skin, clambering to be let out. I glanced off stage again to where Alek should be standing, then shook my head. I couldn't trust him to be near me and I couldn't stand for him to be gone. The internal struggle was maddening.

"I love you all so much," I told my fans. "You might not get to see a wolf tonight, but you will get a brand-new song. It's called 'Two in One' and it's so new that it hasn't even made its way to the studio yet, but I'm debuting it for you, you lucky people!"

Protests turned to cheers. The fans were pacified, at least for one night.

On to Phoenix. Another performance, another night without Alek, and another crowd who thought they'd get to see a wild beast appear out of thin air. Again, I played my new song for them, sitting at the piano, just the keys and my voice reaching out for validation that I hadn't fucked up every aspect of my life. I could still sing. I could still plunk out a tune. I could still be Verity Jayne, popstar normie.

Why wasn't that enough—not for them or for me?

While belting out the final refrain, screams broke out from the front of the audience. I stood abruptly, knocking over the piano bench, trying to see what was happening. Macy showed up at my side and we watched as security tackled someone who had tried to make their way onto the stage.

"Who is it?" I asked. Chip's dirty blonde man bun flashed through my mind. "Is it someone we know?"

"I'm not sure," she said, straining her neck to try to make out who lay underneath a pile of beefy security guards. "No. I don't think so. Man, of all the times for Alek's uncle to get sick..." She looped her arm around mine and gave me a tug. "Let's get you out of here."

#

"Just a random drunk guy. No one to concern yourself with."

I barely heard Janene's words as she went on about the man arrested at the Phoenix show while we were enroute to Tucson. He'd had a knife, but he was in jail now and according to Janene, there was no reason to believe the threat was ongoing. "What happened was terrible, of course," she said and then winked. "But damned if it isn't excellent publicity. Alek must feel terrible that he's missing this."

He won't return. You're on your own.

"I don't feel safe," I said as I watched the desert landscape out the window, remembering another journey on this tour bus where all my heightened senses had infused meaning into my world. Now, the only thing heightened in me was a capacity to fear the worst.

"No shit? Let me remind you..." She sounded terse now, with a tinge of the exasperation I seemed to evoke in those around me. "You refused a new security detail."

"Well... I no longer refuse it. Hire someone. Just tell them I don't want to get to know them. It's not personal... I just ..." Hugging a pillow to my chest, I curled up into a ball and shut my eyes. "I can't go down that road again."

That was all Janene needed to hear. The tour finished out with double the bodyguards: Sven and Amanda. They did their jobs well enough and didn't ask too many questions, but I kept them at arm's length anyways. Either of them could be an Aurum Venari spy, awaiting their next orders, or a Verity Truther hoping to spot me manifesting my wolf. They weren't to be trusted. No one was.

Anyone could be a liar if it served them to hide the truth.

My wolf itched and scratched until it felt like a grenade was about to exploded in me. Still, I kept that part of myself locked away. I ignored the itch and lived with the pain instead. That's how I returned to Los Angeles, with the buzz of tour excitement spent, nothing left but a trapped, howling wolf and an impending sense of doom.

Now what? I asked myself as I sat in my beautiful, expensive, lonely apartment. I'd sent my father back to his house and given Sven and Amanda the night off so I wouldn't have to be alone with them. They'd cleared my home before leaving, but that hadn't help shake the feeling that I wasn't safe here.

My wolf yowled. I needed the release. I needed to walk on padded paws across wet grass. I eyed the door, wondering how much my father would rage at me if I decided to spend the night in a park, just me and my wolf self.

The doorbell jarred me back to the present.

It's me, Verity.

Tears welled up. I rubbed at my eyes as I tried to determine what I should do.

Verity, I know you're there. I can feel it. Please. Open the door.

My legs could barely carry me the twenty feet I needed to reach the door. My hands seemed insistent on shaking too much to unlock the door. When I finally managed it, the shock of seeing him was almost worse than the days I'd spent thinking I'd never seeing him again.

Alek stood in front of me with hair disheveled, two weeks' worth of stubble on his chin, and eyes so sorrowful, I wanted to weep just looking into them. I forced myself to focus so I could keep track of where my emotions ended and his began. In my head, his desires played out, intermingling with my own. I'd let him in, allow him to come him close, close enough that his scent would overwhelm me. I would close the gap between us and then it would be like the first night we spent together all over again. This was what he wanted—for us to both to forget everything but each other. I resisted the urge to let him have that—to have what I too wanted.

But something was wrong with him—very wrong—and sex wasn't going to fix it, however we might wish it would.

I held out a trembling hand to stop him from coming any closer. If he kissed me, it was all over—I would put aside all my hesitations and worries and let desire rule, no matter the cost to us both.

"We can't, Alek." I stepped away and readied my wolf for release. "If you want me to let you in, you'll tell me what new terrible thing you're trying to hide."


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Author's Note: Is Alek hiding something new? What exactly happened to him since he left Verity in Las Vegas?

That's part 2 of this week's bonus chapter! I'll have the next installment up on Sunday, and yep... we'll be getting Alek's POV. But will he still be trying to hide something, even from you, dear reader?  

We will see!

XOXOXO

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