Love Across The Ocean : The Gap Between

5

I felt weird after what had just happened I had never thought to explore my sexuality like that, but I had now. I would never tell anyone of what happened, especially not Duke; I have many brothers; Leandro, Duke and RJ,  but I have always been close to Duke even before we moved Greenwich, CT , he was my favourite brother.

I came up to my house and my heart sank when I saw Chad's black Audi Q3 parked outside. I knew he was still round mine to hang out with my brother. Part of me wanted him to be apologizing  for what had happened between us though. Taking a deep breath, I stepped out of my car and walked towards the house.

Chad was standing on the porch, his hands tucked in his pockets and shoulders slumped forward. He looked up at me with eyes filled with regret.

"I'm sorry," he said, his voice barely a whisper. "I should have told you. I was scared."

My heart ached for him. I could feel the sorrow radiating off him in waves. I stepped closer and put my arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace.

"It's okay," I said. "I just wished you had told me you were instead of ghosting me."

He nodded, tears forming at the corners of his eyes. "I've never been so vulnerable like that, I think I like you."  He leaned his head against my shoulder and I held him close, wanting to give him all the comfort and understanding that I could. We stood there in silence for what felt like an eternity, until finally, Chad pulled away.

"Let's go for a drive," he said.

I wish I could but I still have to have that conversation with my mum about getting suspended. "Come, After I'll be waiting, an don't worry me and Duke talked to her about it, I think she gets it now, although she never wants to see me in her house again." 

Into the house I go. My mom looked surprisingly calm. She bit her lip, " Your brother and I have had a conversation about your suspension, 3 day by the way and I have come to the conclusion it is in fact not your fault, I am proud of how you dealt with Chad, remember we are here in the nicest neighbour in Connecticut and one of the nicest int United States, to learn not for relationships" I clenched my fists, tears started welling up even though my mom wasn't  telling me off particularly "Mom, I like him."

I stepped back and looked into my mother's eyes, angry. I could see her face going red with anger and I clenched my fists at my side, digging my fingernails into my palms ready for a rampage.

"You don't understand!" I shouted. "You don't know what he's like. I love Chad, and he loves me. We are meant to be together, and I'll never give him up!"

My mother's face went pale and then she stepped closer to me. She raised her hand and slapped me across the face. I felt the tears welling in my eyes, but I fought them back. My mother looked at me with regret, her hand still raised.

"I know you don't understand now, but he will ruin your life," she said softly. "High school is meant to be a time of exploration and learning, not a time for getting yourself into trouble with boys who you'll only be with for a month."

I looked away, not wanting to look into her eyes anymore. I knew my mother was right, but I couldn't bear to think of a life without Chad. I couldn't let her take him away from me.

I stepped away from my mother and ran up to my room. Sure enough, Chad's Audi Q3 was still there, I checked the time 17:30, I carefully pushed up the window and cautiously made my way down by slowly sliding down the gutter. I safely landed and quickly dashed towards his car. 

 I knew he had been waiting there for a while. I felt a warmth in my chest, knowing that he had been there for me, waiting and hoping I'd come out.

I opened the door and sat in the car, my heart racing with anticipation. Chad started the engine and drove away. I knew I had made the right decision

We drove around for hours, talking and laughing, the car windows rolled down so we could feel the cool night breeze against our skin. The stars twinkled above us in the dark night sky, and the air smelled of salt and sea, I could tell we were nearly at the beach. All around us was a stillness that could only be found during the early hours of the morning. I glanced at my boy and smiled, suddenly aware of how our conversation had lulled and how close together we were in the car. He made me feel as though I was the only girl in the world, to think it was only yesterday I had that erotic night with Stacy but this, this was more. I felt my heart flutter as I realized how romantic it was, it was pure. We both laughed at the absurdity of the situation, and I turned the radio up, singing along to the love songs playing. The night felt magical, and I knew I'd never forget this moment. But then, just as I was about to lean in for a kiss, Chad piped up: "Oh, don't mind me, I'm just here for the ride!" We both burst into laughter, the moment too perfect to be real. I turned the radio up louder and sang along, not wanting the night to end. I knew I'd never forget this moment, and I felt so lucky to have shared it with such a wonderful person. Chad, he is something different. I am certain.

At some point during the night, Chad had pulled off the highway and onto a winding road that led even more towards the beach, the air smelt even more salty. He drove slowly, and I could feel his anticipation as he looked out towards the horizon, waiting for the first hint of the morning sun. It was truly magical.

Finally, as the sky began to lighten, he pulled up to the beach. We stepped out of the car, and I gasped in awe at the beauty that surrounded us. The white sand tickled my feet, the sea clear, just like our relationship, it was pure.  On the horizon, the sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, painting the sky with a beautiful pink and orange gradient, I had never seen something so perfect. The water was still and peaceful.

Chad put his arms around my waist and pulled me in our hips touched each other I looked up, lifting my hand up to stroke his hair and he pulled me in some more then we shared a passionate kiss. His lips were gentle against mine and I could feel the warmth radiating from him. I felt his hands travel down my back and pull me closer, and I shivered with anticipation. This kiss made me  forget everything I knew, it was though he had kissed  all my knowledge out of me but one think remained in my mind, I wanted him.

We embraced each other, and I held onto him tightly, never wanting to let go. In that moment, my heart told me something, Chad was my forever. I bit my lip, "Chad, you're my forever." He gave me a look and then kissed my cheek. At that moment a light appeared in the beautiful sea and I decided that light was our relationship, and a sign we would last.

We walked hand in hand down the beach, the sand slipping through our toes as the sun continued to rise. We talked and laughed, and Chad pushed me into the sea we then played a game of sand fight, he chased me down the beach. He paused "I promise." I was confused. He looked at me again and smiled, "I promise to love you, always." I smiled. "Just not right now." he said and quickly bent down and threw sand at me, I should have seen that coming but  I had never felt so close to another human being before. 

As we reached the end of the beach, Chad pulled me close, wrapping his arms around me and holding me close. We stood there for what felt like hours, watching the sun climb higher in the sky and feeling the warmth of the light on our skin. I could feel Chad's breath on my neck, and I leaned into him, our bodies melding together in perfect harmony.

After, Chad took my hand and led me back to the car. We drove back to the city, the sun high in the sky, as we both reflected on the beauty of the moment we had just experienced. That morning, with Chad, will stay with me forever. Although we had only known each other for a month, I'd known him for what seems like an eternity.

I am most defiantly falling for him.