Part 31

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The grid gets ready for the race to begin... when it starts to rain. What great timing that is. Luckily, it doesn't matter because we have a race to win. 

Everyone leaves the grid, just leaving the drivers. We get our last things ready and the lights go out. 

Immediately, Max stays in the front and manages to get a flying start, Checo following behind closely. The rain begins to pour more, and Latifi already crashes into the wall, causing an immediately red flag and everyone to go back into the pits to change to wet tires. 

Restart. We get ourselves ready again, get the track cleared and manage to head out once again, having the same start as before. Round the corners, Max and Checo get wheel to wheel - which no doubt gets the whole garage nervous. In the pit lane, I can see Christian sweat a little at the thought of a crash getting both of our drivers out - which pours our points down the drain. 

Leclerc pushes in closely behind them, and behind them.. is Daniel?

He managed to push everyone out of the way in the time I was watching the front of the grid, and get to the front. I do a little cheer to myself and look around the garage to make sure no one knew I was doing it for him. I'm supposed to hate him.

We're looking really good so far, me messaging Daniel's phone while the race continues telling him how proud I am of him for getting P4 in such a short amount of time, even though he won't be able to see it until after the race. I can imagine the way he's feeling right now - the adrenaline rushing through his body. 

I wonder what he's thinking about too - probably something nerdy about the gears or the aerodynamics of the car, something he always tries to talk to me about and I can never understand.

It makes me realise how we've had our ups and downs, but that's all over now and I don't have to worry. Because he loves me for me and he never would do anything to hurt me.... anymore! 

I watch as the cars go around again and again and I can feel a bad building fill up in my stomach as the rain continues to get worse and worse, and from the cameras can tell that the visibility is not looking great. To be honest, I don't even know why they're out there. It's not safe at all. 

I find a monitor next to Jamie where we watch the race together and talk about the conditions,  next to a couple of engineers who are shaking their heads more and more everytime our cars go around the track. 

We then see a car snag a corner badly and go spinning - not even just spinning. It hits another bump of a corner and then flips, and flips again, and flips again. It just feels like time stops as we watch this car go around and around. I see a hint of orange and my heart drops, and I feel my eyes cloud up. 

It's Daniel spinning that much, because I can see him slowly move down the leaderboard and I feel my heart stop as it feels like forever until his car stops, by slamming right into a wall. 

I just look at Jamie and I think my face gives everything away as I feel the blood drain from my face, and she just grabs and holds me while we wait for Daniel to say something to indicate that he's okay. 

He never says anything.

I slide down the garage wall, tears streaming down my eyes waiting for the love of my life to reply to calls that he's not dead. 

Everyone is probably staring at me right now, but I cannot see a thing through my burning tears.

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