*Author's note: Strong trigger warning! This book contains graphic depictions of violence with some disturbing scenes involving m*rder and the use of weapons, torture, domestic violence, including mental and physical abuse, sexual situations and mature language. It may trigger certain individuals who are sensitive to this subject matter. It is marked mature. You must be 17 or older to read this book.
I stare straight ahead as I'm waiting for the elevator doors to open. The two women behind me are chatting it up about an upcoming party they're attending at the governor's mansion this weekend. I would usually tune my brain out right about now, not needing to fill it with useless blabber that doesn't concern me, but I hear "blah, blah, blah, blah...governor and it strikes a nerve.
"His parties are just the best. The food of course is catered in and always so delicious. I spend most of my time over by the bar and hovering over the hors d'oeuvre table. I'm so full by the end of the night I can hardly move."
"Oh me too, Kim. Me too! I'm so glad you took that promotion because we've really hit it off. Now, I'll have someone to hang out with this year, so I'm actually looking forward to it!"
"Yeah, these things can get pretty boring. It's all about shaking hands and marketing yourself. The ladder to the top starts forming a line at these parties. Hell, I've paid my dues waiting in that line!"
"Haven't we all?"
They step into the elevator and suddenly realize I'm within listening distance and clam up. They both exchange awkward glances with each other and then stare ahead at the lights on the panel, praying the doors will open soon so the awkwardness will end and they can continue yammering away.
While we're going up, I study how each of them are dressed and memorize the badges they're wearing. When the elevator finally comes to a stop on the eleventh floor and they step out into the hall, they continue talking about how that Kim lady is now in charge of the catering.
After eavesdropping on my new best friends, a new plan starts to emerge in my twisted little mind. As soon as the doors close, I frantically mash the first floor button over and over so I can get out of here. This new plan is brilliant and will keep me from getting my hands dirty. It will also allow me to fly under the radar a bit more than usual. I definitely need to dial it back a bit since I have these agents on my ass now. The last thing I need to do is get caught. I have a lot more trash to take out and after finding all the new evidence in Darrell's house, it's starting to pile up and reeks of criminal pieces of shit.
When I get back into my car, I suddenly have a strong desire to do something completely spontaneous. It just so happens it will go along perfectly with my new plan, too.
"So I really think a platinum blonde color with a mid-length bob would look super cute on you. It's pretty drastic though, so I must warn you, you'll probably be unrecognizable when I'm finished."
"Yes, that sounds great. Let's do it!"
As the hair stylist walks away to go get her supplies, I zone out for a moment, lost in the reflection in the mirror in front of me. The image taunts me, You can change your look all you want. I still know who you are. You can't hide from me.
I glare back, daring her to test me right now. Shut the fuck up! I battle back, right as the stylist returns.
"Are you ready to get started, hun?"
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"Eh, yeah...I sure am. I could really use a pick me up right about now!"
"Oh girl, I know exactly what you mean and this should really do the trick!"
I close my eyes as she starts to apply the color to my hair and imagine myself lying on the beach, listening to the waves. Damn, I miss the ocean! When this is all over, I'm going to take a nice relaxing trip to Florida. I'm going to lie on the beach with my toes in the sand, sip Mai Tais and play with the little umbrellas in my glass while the gentle waves melt my stress away. It will be my reward for finishing the job.
A couple of hours later, the stylist is all done and is preparing me for the big reveal. "Wow! It turned out beautiful! Here, take a look!"
She spins me around in the chair toward the mirror and my jaw drops to the floor. The idea I had on a whim to change my look so that no one would recognize me worked, because shit, I don't even recognize me! "Wow! I'm speechless right now!"
I'm in complete shock as I run my fingers through the bouncy platinum blonde hair and lock my eyes to the girl in the mirror smiling back at me. I leap out of the chair and plant myself in front of the mirror and praise her for a job well done while I continue to admire her work. "You did an absolutely fabulous job! This is better than I could have ever imagined it was going to look!"
She smiles back as she starts sweeping the piles of the old me into a dustpan and then walks behind me to unfasten the cape from around my neck and shoulders. I dig through my purse and happily pull out two crisp hundred-dollar bills and hand them to her. "I'll get you some change."
"No, keep it. You deserve it!"
"Thank you so much. That's very kind of you, Emily."
"You're welcome, and thanks again."
I proudly push my sunglasses up on my face as I swing my purse strap up over my shoulder, and with a new bounce in my step, I leave the beauty shop feeling like a famous super model. Now, off to my retail therapy session. I could use some flashy new clothes to match how I feel right about now.
Several hours and several hundred dollars later, I return to my hotel, bags in hand and decide it's time to find a nicer place to live. I have new clothes, a new hair style and a brand new outlook on life. I'm ready to turn over a brand new leaf as soon as I get all of this shit taken care of. I can really see myself living near the beach in Florida. I can change my name, get a job I'll actually enjoy this time and just start over. I need this change and I promise you, I'll never look back.
Oh, don't fool yourself, Harper, you can change where you live, your look and your life, but wherever you go, I'll always remind you what you left behind!
As I pack everything up for the move, I continue to ignore her constant attempts to get to me. I've learned a few things these past few weeks. If I refuse to engage her, she shuts the fuck up.
I return to my car and stack everything neatly in the trunk. I think I'll find a classy hotel this time and tonight, I'll treat myself to a nice, expensive dinner. I've been through a lot and damn it, I deserve it!
The next day, right after breakfast, I jump right into action, making several phonecalls and putting the wheels in motion for my next "job".
The very first thing I have to do today is meet with this guy named Travis, and it makes me a little nervous. I asked around and found out he's the "go to" guy if you need a new identity and boy, do I need one. If this plan of mine is going to work, I have to leave Harper Wallace behind and embrace the new me; whoever that may be. Hell, maybe I'll like my new name better. I've never felt quite like a Harper. I've always sort of felt like an alien in my own skin. I take a moment to chastize my parents for not giving me a more fitting name like Maria or Rachel or..."oh wait. Just the mention of that name makes my skin crawl. I hated doing what I did to her, but she had it coming. They all did.
