"But you didn't have to cut me off
Made it out like it never happened
And that we were nothing."
- Excerpt from Somebody That I Used to Know by Gotye
I swallow as the forbidden question seemingly echos throughout my brain.
Who is the father?
Brielle, just tell him as you rehearsed.
"Not you, if you're that curious," I lie, "I had a one-night-stand while I was on vacation and I realized I was pregnant... decided to keep him though."
"Oh."
The small sound that comes out of him is out of distaste but I don't know if I fully convinced him.
"Don't think I would ever want to have a kid with you," I seethe, giving him my finishing blow.
His poker face falters quite briefly, showing me a sadden expression and I bite my tongue to prevent myself from displaying any emotion.
"So when was he born?"
"It doesn't matter," I rush out.
He mumbles something inaudible, probably in Russian and then says, "How old is he?"
"Why do I always need to repeat myself, it doesn't matter, he's not your kid."
I'm getting nervous and I'm worried he's going to tell me that he, in fact, has looked up Ashton and knows every single bit of information about him but wanted to see if I would just tell him.
I know for a fact that's something Lorenzo would do.
"I can't just know? I'm curious about him. Is that a problem?"
I roll my eyes, "Yes it is, I don't want to give someone who I barely know personal information about a child. My child."
"Bri-"
I interrupt him instead, drawing an even deeper line between us, "Plus, you'll be leaving soon anyway so the information is rather unnecessary for you to know."
"It's not like I'm a stranger, we have history."
"Had," I correct, "I also wish you were a stranger. It would help me forget all the painful memories you gave me."
It's silent between us for the couple seconds, the sentence that came out of my mouth hangs in the air. He takes a deep breath in, contemplating saying something but instead, shocking me, stands up and walks out of the diner.
I bite my lip to stop myself from crying, just staring hard at the seat that's now empty. I blink, letting a tear slip down as I hurriedly wipe it away and I begin to calm myself down.
Why is life doing this to me now?
This always happens. It goes great for a couple of months, sometimes even years and then it all comes crashing down.
Had a happy family then the divorce happened.
I met Lorenzo and fell in love, then Natalie happened, showing me the real him.
Now. Look what's fucking happening now, I'm at peace with my son and then he returns to come and torment me, probably still thinking I 'belong' next to him.
I can't stand it.
I can't stand him.
- любовь -
LORENZO ANTONOV
I walk inside Brielle's apartment building rather early in the morning. I know Ashton will be getting ready for school because I was here around this time.
I don't want to trick anybody and betray Brielle who most likely doesn't want this to happen in a fucking longshot but I'm impatient and if every conversation we have are going to go like a couple of days ago then we're going to get nowhere.
She's not going to tell me if he's my son or not directly so I'm going to the biological and scientific approach.
I'm just going to swab the kid.
Yes, I'm getting a DNA test. I'll bring it to a doctor and pay whatever the amount is to see if he's mine.
I try not to smile but I'm nervous and excited in anticipation. We might actually have a kid together but if it's not... It'll hurt knowing that Brielle actually had sex with a man and kept his baby much rather than aborting it.
I'll still raise the kid as my own though... after taking the heartache that will soon come after.
There is a slight problem with my plan. I don't know how I'm going to be able to enter the house and she's very persistent on keeping me out and being alone with Ashton is not going to be able to happen without patience.
I suck at having patience.
I accidentally bump into someone and he stumbles back just a little bit.
"Shit, I'm sorry man," I apologize and he gives me a shy smile, scratching the nape of his neck and then his eyes widen.
"Do you live here?" he asks and I contemplate saying yes but I don't want Brielle thinking I'm still my creepy self.
I still kind of am but...
"Uh, I'm just visiting the woman in room 405," I explain. He might also think that I'm weird or that I'm doing something abnormal.
"Oh, can you tell her that there is a package for her? She told me to keep watch because it was important."
I nod and he gives me a light pat on the shoulder as he walks off.
A smile forms on my lips, I think I just found out a way to get her out of the apartment, leaving me briefly alone with Ashton.
I don't need to lie to find a way in which would get her more suspicious of me.
I knock on the door and in a couple of seconds, Brielle opens it but once she notices it's me, her face instantly drops into an annoyed scowl.
Okay, that hurts but understandable.
Brielle... she's still so fucking pretty. I wasn't expecting anything different but damn... She obviously gained a little bit of weight due to, you know, a child but based on the outfit she's wearing that's hugging her curves, she still maintained her shape.
She's absolutely gorgeous.
My angel.
"What do you want?" she asks, snapping me out of my daze.
"Uh, there's a package for you downstairs and you need to sign it."
"Okay...oh shit," she grumbles underneath her breath, her face expressing panic when she realizes what I just said and then she leaves the apartment, not even caring about me standing right in front of a wide open door.
Don't mind if I do.
I slip inside the house and go searching inside the rather tiny apartment. I walk past a bedroom with Ashton sitting on the bed, presumingly putting his socks on.