Wistful

Chapter 8: new feelings?

Tong went to the kitchen to heat up the food got Build and Bible went to the living room and before he sits down on the couch, he remembered he forgot his book in Build's room and walked back to the room to take his book back and didn't know what he about to see when he opened the door to see Build half naked, only towel wrapped around his waist. They both stood there shocked staring at each other, but Build tried to back away, but the floor was wet under him, and he slipped and almost fall down, but Bible ran fast to hold him to stop him from falling, one hand was behind Build's head and the other one wrapped around his waisted and pulled him to held him tight towards his chest tightly, Build's hands on his shoulder. they both stared to each other's eyes, their hearts beating faster, their faces were so close to each other's. "are you okay?" Bible asked and Build nodded slowly. Bible was about to let Build go but he wrapped his arms around his neck, pulling him back into a hug, hiding his blushing cheeks. Bible was shocked, and without thinking he hugged him back "B-Biu... you sure you're okay?" Build nodded as he hides his head. Bible couldn't think, he didn't know if he should push him away, it's okay to hug since that's what Build wants or punch his own face that he is touching Build's skin and how soft it is. He closed his eyes to calm himself down to not do anything bad, but his hand betrayed him, when he suddenly rubbed Build's back which made Build flinch. Bible felt it, he wanted to jump out the window, but he didn't except what about to happen when Build pulled away a little and he can see his pinkish cheeks then to his eyes, he just lost in them, they were shining, beautiful eyes and didn't realize Build's face coming closer to his until their lips touched, to kiss him softly with his eyes closed. He was shocked when he realized he slowly kissed him back. It was a sweet soft kiss, mixed with love and yearning for each other. "BIBLE? ARE YOU UP THERE? IS BUILD FINISHED YET? CALL HIM TO COME EAT" They both pulled away jumping when they heard Tong screaming. Bible pulled Build to his chest before he yelled back "COMING!" he pulled Build who was blushing hard and slowly looked at Bible and smiled, Bible smiled back at him "go wear your clothes and come down, we will talk about this later okay?" Build nodded and Bible kissed his forehead before he left the room, closing the door behind him.

Build covered his face "what have you done!!! Oh my god I can't believe myself I did it... but... he returned it... does that mean" he whispered to himself, blushed so hard, walked to wear his clothes. At the same time, Bible touched his lips, he can hear his heart beating so fast and so loud 'he... kissed me- Biu kissed me...' he was in shock and didn't know how to feel about it, he tried to hide it but smiled and walked down to where Tong is "where is Biu?" he asked as he put the food on the table "he will come down in a minute, he just finished" he sat on the couch and Tong looked at him, he noticed something different about him and that smile on his face, looked weird to Tong "why your face red and you smile like that?" he asked and Bible turned his face away from Tong "its hot man! stop asking me" Tong was confused and wanted to ask again but he saw Build coming "hey ~ feels better after the shower?" he asked "yes, thank you for taking care of me" he smiled and sat to eat "it was all Bible who took care of you, I was busy with my work and came when you woke up" Build turned to look at Bible who looked back at him at the same time they both turned away again "thank you" Build said and continued eating "no worries" Bible answered, Tong looked at them both and he knew for sure something happened between them before they came down but he stayed quiet and just look at them "we will have to go soon, you will be okay by yourself?" Tong asked "yes, my mom still here and I will go rest more after I finish, don't worry" Build smiled "okay cutie, take care of yourself" he patted his head before he helped Build to clean the plates when he finished "time to go Bible" Tong said as he walked to the door and Bible stood up and walked towards Build who was standing there looking at him, they both smiled "if you need anything, call me okay?" Bible brushed Build's hair behind his ear "hmm I will" Build smiled more that his dimples showed up, it took Bible's breath away for a second before smiled back, they kept staring at each other before they heard Tong calling Bible to come bringing both of them back to reality "I have to go now" Bible said before he walked to the door "mhm, take care" Build said walking behind Bible until they walked out and Build waived bye to both of them.

Build was about to get to his bedroom after they left when he saw his mother walking out her room "you will go to work?" he asked her, and she looked at him and touched his forehead "you feeling better? If yes, then I will go to work if not I can work from home." He giggled "I am more than fine mom, you can go to work" she patted his head "I will go in the morning, lets rest more" she walked back to her room "good idea" Build walked to his room.

Tong and Bible were walking back to the house "so you still won't tell me what happened between you and him?" Bible coughed loudly as his cheeks turned red "what do you mean? Nothing happened between us" Tong rolled his eyes and gave him a side eye "I am not blind Bible, you know? Both of your reactions says a lot" Bible bites his bottom lip "nothing happened, and you saw nothing!!" he walked faster to the house. Tong just sighed and shrugged it off. Bible who ran to his room and locked the door without saying Hi to his mother. She looked at him and then to Tong who entered behind his after a bit "what's with him?" she asked, and Tong sat next to her "something happened between him and Biu, but he refused to tell me" he said and Bible's mother looked worried "oh don't worry, something good happened not bad" she was confused until she saw Tong smiling, she understood "oh! I see" she smiled and sighed in relief. "He acts like a high school girl, so cute" Tong was teasing him "I am glad these two can have their Peace and nothing bad can happen to them now. Hopefully" Tong nodded and patted his aunt's back "hope so, this time I will try to help them both as much as I can" he said and she smiled.

Bible closed his door before he held his chest, he remembered the kiss then touched his lips. He didn't understand why he is like this; he is happy but why he feels guilty. "you feel guilty now, aren't you?" Bible looked at the young boy standing Infront him, who looked so angry. Bible didn't reply to him and went to sit on his bed "you can't answer me? You can't give yourself any excuse of what you did to him? you kissed him, lying to him, and using his memory lost to take advantage of him? did you tell him what you did to him? you think he would be happy knowing you kissed him? you are selfish, so selfish. You don't deserve him! ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!! HOW DARE YOU KISS HIM!! HOW DARE YOU USING HIM AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF- "Bible covered his ear and trying not to listen "go away, I Know all of this and I don't need you to remind me who I am, I know what I did. I know what will happen. It's my fault and I know" he sounded angry and closed his eyes tight "I will do what you want just go away please" he slowly opened his eyes when he couldn't hear anything and looked to see he was alone in his room. He felt his chest got heavy. He sighed and went to his desk to write in his dairy.

Honey, I am sorry. I'm sorry for lying to you, I am sorry for hiding the truth from you, I am sorry for using you and taking advantage of you. I am guilty for everything happened. I shouldn't have done that to you. Maybe he is right, I should let you go. I don't deserve someone like you. I was selfish. I wish I can fix my mistakes, but will I ever stop the guilt when I don't know if you will ever forgive me if you know what I did to you? I hate it... I hate it so much... I want time to come back, I want to protect you from what happened ... but I can't, I can't bring myself to tell you the truth, am I really taking advantage of your lost memory? I don't want to do this anymore if I did. I don't want to use you it hurts me. It's killing me. At the same time... I can't let you go... I can't, I will die... I can't... Honey I am sorry please don't leave me- please I can't live without you... please

He couldn't continue writing, holding his tears was chocking him yet they fall down nonstop, he couldn't hold it anymore and start crying, whispering "I'm sorry... Biu...I am so sorry... don't leave me" he covered his head as he laid it on the table, letting his pain out with every tear falling down one after another in the dark room that only a small dim light from his desk lamb.

On the other side, Build went back to his room and looked out the window to see it was closed and the covered by the curtain "did he go to sleep?" he asked himself and smiled softly "good night, Bible" when he was about to lay back on his bed, he noticed a book. "oh, it's his book, I will give it to him tomorrow" then he went to sleep again.

To be continued ....