Can a placeholder Librarian be happy?

Chapter 1: Question

I am still thinking about what happened that day, I collapsed and now my memories are becoming hazy. All I can remember was my duty as a school librarian and everything felt off for some reason. Everything that supposed to be normal become something that I find weird. Well, that's an understatement. Is it normal I wear glasses but don't have any eyes? Is it normal to not have eyes? I never noticed it until that day.

The day that I read those random book and the same day I collapsed after. I began to questioned on a lot of things either about myself or others. Everything feel abnormal. My 'friends' all seems weirdly monotonous and their discussion become really.... Not natural? I don't know, their tone was monotonous, robotic and their talk have no substance like 'did you see that video?' 'the weather is nice today' (even though it was thunderstorm) and sometime they were gossiping about a specific someone from the next class. I... never questioned all these things before but why now?

To be honest, I felt like I'm walking on an eggshell. Everytime a question come to mind about my surroundings, my heart beat louder than ever. I never felt like this before. At times, to the point I can hardly breathe and need to retreat to infirmary but it got even worse after I saw the nurse's eyes, they were like jewels that I will never have. I fainted that day and woke up in my bed next morning like yesterday never happened. Truly, uncanny. I immediately went toward my bathroom and looked at the mirror and I'm still eyeless. I let out a long sigh and get ready for school.

Yup, they act like yesterday never happened. No one asked me where I am yesterday and all of my library work was done like I'm the one who doing it... creepy. After school was done, I went straight toward the infirmary to ask the nurse about yesterday (my breathe instantly went unstable after looking at her eyes) and she said i never went there yesterday. This confused me greatly. With that done, I retreat to my safe space a.k.a the school library, the smell of books around me was really calming to me and I wrote down all of my questions.

While I noted everything down, at the corner of my eye (well, vision) I noticed a familiar note book and It make my breath become unstable again so I pull my vision away from the book. What's up with me this day? Everyday full of anxiety for no reason. But still, that note book make me curious. Why do I act like this? It's the same feeling as seeing the nurse's eyes. Maybe, just maybe, the answer is written in the book? The answer to all my worries these past few days.

My arm was shaking as I slowly grabbed the book. It has a nice light blue cover with floral pattern and there is something written on it. It wrote, 'Maisarah Winterheld's personal notebook'.

huh... 'Winterheld'... I've heard of that name before. Isn't she one of The Student Council? If I remembered correctly, she has the coldest demeanor among the council. Her stare could make anyone freeze in place even if they were a delinquent and I heard that she was having an episode then she attacked a student....

oh...

OH...

wait, wait, wait. This doesn't make any sense! Based on her notebook, she isn't always one of the student council??? WHAT???

You want me to believe that THE Red Ice Queen used to be a background character and she was never exist before she took action???? EH???