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I've been up all night, watching while the bright glaring sun came up, and glimpsed into my small window near my medium-sized bed. Deeply terrified, not batting one single eyelid while I was tightly wrapped around in my soft light blue covers. I changed into comfier clothing after my long and distressing shower, trying to get my life back together after the big changes that I would have to get used to. The comfier clothing I changed into was a tight and secure dark grey tank top, with a pair of dark grey soft sweats.
Something small to help bring me back and assist me back Into my old comforting and happy life that I completely forgot about.
However, the night wasn't as easy and comforting as I possibly made it seem. I was frightened that if I were to close my eyes, my infuriated and vicious older brother would appear and let all of his pent-up anger on me. What stopped that from somehow happening, was the wooden room door being locked, and just shouting to the person on the other side of the door who knocked occasionally. However, it wasn't enough, I knew he possibly had the key to the door, and he would get to me. I'd rather be awake and ready to defend myself than be peacefully sleeping and allowing him access to hurt me.
My slim fingers clicked on JJ's contact throughout the long and boring night, wondering the slight chance he would answer, or give me satisfaction after last night. It wasn't some little argument we could just drop, we needed to have a deep talk. I just didn't know how to bring it up to him, because what if he was now sensitive about the topic? Maybe severely incensed with me and my behavior towards him. I didn't deserve him.
Nonetheless, I was like a massive black cloud over his head. A side of me didn't want to call him. Not only because it was late in the night but shortly too early in the morning, but I didn't know how to talk to him. I didn't know our status. I didn't know whether I still had the right to call him after last night. Too many thoughts, and negative opinions of my own that got way over my head, only ruining my mindset.
"Maddie, baby! Youre father and I are heading to take care of something at work, who knows what time we are coming back." Suddenly a delicate and familiar voice came from the other side of the wooden door, alongside some weak knocks.
It was my mother.
"I don't know if you hear me, but your TV is on. You never sleep with your TV on. Let me know if you need anything...I love you..." She Informed, causing my mouth to slowly stretch into a tight-lipped and delighted smile at some sort of process of my home life.
