Chapter 10: What Really Happens

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CW: mentions of SA

The prefects have all given up trying to stop us from sneaking in alcohol. Cyra, Manon, and Diamond share a dorm room; they host a party one day and everyone gets drunk all over again. I don't—I've learned my lesson. But it's just our friends and our group and it's like an elite club all on its own. It's a wonderful, debauched debacle. Some people don't show up. Es, for one. Nandika, for another. She's been quiet all month; don't know what's up with her.

Because Es has shied away from partying after her first initiation and Noelise hates other people in general, I never get the chance to host a party in our room. To be honest I'm a little glad. The cleanup afterwards looks like a crime scene. I just show up and bring some bottles of Cabernet to share.

"What's Italy like?" Seung-jun asks me one day as we watch Cahyono and Mikhail compete to see who can down the most shots.

I shrug. "It's nice. Why?"

"Me and Jasper have been planning to go once we graduate," Seung-jun says wistfully. "I know you hate the guy, but he knows how to have fun. It's all planned out. We'll go and travel the world, seduce beautiful women, and have the time of our lives."

"What, no Teddy?"

"He's too responsible. We're going to be ridiculous and spend ridiculous amounts of money and have ridiculous amounts of fun."

"Don't go to Italy then," I laugh. "Nothing ever happens there."

"Maybe not where you live. I've heard Rome is pretty alive though. Where do you live again?"

"Port Rondo," I supply. "We have a nice house there overlooking the sea. It's awfully boring though. They don't do parties like these. When I was younger I had to go to parties and sit still for hours on end because there was nobody my age. My mom's a bit of a socialite so she forced me to go."

"What, and you're not a socialite?"

I laugh. "Well, I wasn't at five."

"You should show us your house sometime. Italian houses are all so pretty."

"You should show me yours first," I challenge.

Seung-jun rolls his eyes. "Please. It's the ugliest thing I've ever seen."

I leave the party feeling a bit odd. I can't quite place the feeling. It's easy to fit in when you're rich and everyone else is rich but making friends, real friends, is harder. Friends so close that you make plans to travel the world and seduce women with them. Friends so close that you text them and tell them when you've been arrested. Friends like that require certain things which I just can't give.

The full story about Jasper's arrest comes out eventually, shared in texts in our groupchat. He sends us a picture of the car, which is red and fast. I wonder if I really did remember driving that, or if that was all a hallucination induced by alcohol. I mention this to Es, but she looks at me oddly. "It was only Jasper and Mia in the car," she tells me. "He told us." So maybe I'm just remembering wrong.

Apparently, Jasper was driving with Mia and when they were pulled over, Mia completely ditched him. Jasper, for all his Rochester prestige and status, couldn't sufficiently charm an angry cop. He didn't have his licence or wallet on him either so he was completely on his own, rotting in a holding cell until his parents finally came to bail him out and give the police station a piece of their mind. So in the end, those two things were related. I guessed as much.

Even with better parties, school is a bore. As well as a struggle. I simply cannot understand maths or science or anything for the life of me. I've just about given up trying. I don't need a diploma anyways.

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