Ashley Johnson
Today is not my day.
This time last year, if I was trapped in a old empty store room with Bradley, I would have loved every single second of it. It would have been so much fun... Two best friends laughing and joking around with each other...
"I guess we both have an hours detention then" Bradley knocked me out of my train of thought.
My gaze focused back up to Bradley's face. I gave him a small nod, rolled my eyes the other way and stood up. I squeezed my petite body passed Bradley (whose body resembles the hulk when stood near me, I guess he's been working out) and walked slowly towards the door. Once again I banged hard on the door... No use. No one came to my rescue. Has my knight in shining armour been hit by a flying burrito?
Sliding my back down the floor, I dared to sit on the dusty carpet that doesn't look like it has been cleaned since I was running around in nappies with my curly hair in pig tails. Bradley sighed extremely loud. Probably trying to catch my attention.
He sighed again.
And again.
"Will you just quit it already?" I near enough shouted at him. To start with Bradley looked confused but then a smile formed on his lips. Now I'm confused. "Why are you smiling?"
"Because you have finally said something to me since being stuck in here" he chuckled looking down at his feet.
"Trust me on this you would prefer it if I was quiet" I snapped back causing him to jolt his head up in surprise.
"So you clearly haven't read the letter yet" He stated his hand motioning towards my bag where his little letter was poking out.
To begin with I looked at him confused. "How would you know?" I questioned him.
"I just know." A Smirk played on his lips.
"Tell me?" I pushed.
"Read it now" He answered looking deep into my baby blue eyes, resulting me to turn away and reach for the 'important' letter.
Well here goes nothing...
Dear Ashley,
I know I was a complete jerk to you but I also know that I have literally begged for you forgiveness over and over again. I'm sorry that what I did was wrong. Really wrong. Like totally unacceptable.
I'm sorry for all those things I said and I know I was in the wrong for them I never meant to hurt you I 'pinky promise', you were my best friend and I can't believe what I did to you and I understand that no matter how many times I say sorry it doesn't erase the fact that I went behind your back but Josh was a jerk and you deserved someone better and I tried to make you see that but I hurt you. A lot. Causing you to run to him anyway and he must have done something right if you lasted so long. But I didn't write this letter to talk about Josh.
I broke your trust and I broke that pinky promise you made us make, but I loved you... Not in that way (can you remember that, how we had to keep telling people that we would never love each other in that way) damn I wish I could turn back time to that moment, but I can't so we are both going to have to move forward now. I'm not saying forget about it because I understand that won't be possible but by the end of this year I won't be here anyway, I hope, and I can't leave without my best friend forgiving me. You clearly don't understand how sorry I am. But..
I'm sorry,
Bradley.
P.S. you meant the world to me, my one and only true friend. I'm sorry. I know what your thinking... Damn you can smell the cheesiness from here but I don't care.
Well him and his cheesy balls got that right. Bradley lets out a deranged chuckle making me realise I said that out loud.
"Soooo..." Bradley finally speaks up.
"So what?" I snap back. "Are you forgiven? Is that what you're going to ask me?" I carry on just as harshly.
Bradley's face forms a frown as he nods his head slowly, unsure whether it's the right gesture.
"No!" I can't help but shout at him. "No you're not forgiven you douchebag, what you did was wrong-"
"I've apologised."
"You told everyone I was in love with you and that you jet friend zoning me!" I near enough scream.
"Technically, you did love me" he starts.
"Not in that way! You made everyone believe I was I love with you whilst I was with Josh!" Now I'm angry.
"He wasn't right for you!" He shouts back.
"That's not for you to decide for me!" I feel my eyes fill with tears as what he says is true even if I do love him.
"Well I'm sorry I tried to help you!"
"That made everyone hate me!" I wipe away the tear that's freely falling down my cheek and lower my head. My hands search for the ends of my top to play with, a habit I have whenever I get nervous. "Did you know after you said that..." I sniffle up.
"What?" Concern present in his voice.
"He then cheated on me a lot and treating me like crap when we were together alone" I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding.
He's the first person I've ever told.
Bradley made his way over to where I was sitting down. "He cheated on me. Do you even realise how worthless that can make someone feel? Because it does. He started drinking a lot at night too and if I tried to leave the relationship he would tell me not to be stupid because I have no one else, everyone hates me and he would make my life at school social hell. So, in the end I decided laughing off the pain was easier than crying" I spoke with emotions pouring out of me, literally - I stopped wiping the tears away.
Bradley stopped and sat down inches away from me. "But you always looked so happy at school with him"
I let out a dry laugh. "It's called acting, Bradley, you know I do take drama so I should be pretty decent at it."
I realise that I'm falling into old habits and I have to stop before he gets the impression that I have forgiven him; because I most definitely haven't.
"But anyway," I continued "all in all I do love him a lot and he can be the sweetest guy ever when he wants to be."
Bradley's face changed from being smiley to expressionless on seconds. "How can you love someone like that?" He near enough shouts.
"Because, he was there for me when you wasn't! He was there for me when you started hanging out with the populars and he was there for me when I was feeling lonely, okay?" I stand up and shout back.
"He cheated on you!" He answers.
"He was pissed off at me because you told him I was practically cheating on him with you!" I scream; anger rising in me. "It was your fault" I spoke a little calmer. "It was all your fault."
Bradley's expression soon turned guilty. "Anyway he stopped sleeping around with other girls and we are fine okay just... Just leave me alone."
Silence falls upon the tiny store room but it isn't a comfortable silence; its awkward. I can feel his eyes burning through the side of my head. Why can't the stupid door just open now? We've waited long enough.
"I thought you were over?" He suddenly questions me. I slowly move my head to face him, shocked by the quick question fired at me.
"Sure we are, but come on, how many times have we broken up and got back together? Too many to count if you ask me." I respond, unsure of how to answer such question. "Anyway he's trying, he wants me to go out with him next weekend" I add; hurriedly.
"He does?"
"Yep" I reply popping the 'p'.
Josh has asked me if I wanted to go meet up at our spot next weekend and he said he'll be there waiting for me and its my choice whether I want to go or not. I honestly don't know what to do. If I don't go then that's a two year relationship straight down the drain. But if I do, he might hurt me again - although I do doubt it. I know why he acts this way, he has a father worse than Bart Bass, 'don't you think you two act like a married couple' , 'Josh son, aren't you too young to be in a serious relationship?' The constant questions about him and me, that's why he pushes me away most of the time.
Usually I'm too stubborn to let him. So why should this time be any different?
"Are you going to go?" Bradley questions once again. Isn't he nosey!
Just then a I hear the door handle go.
Come on faster.
The door swings open and I walk out happy to get away from-
"You didn't answer me." He speaks in a low hushed tone as if he's offering me drugs. Then I look down at my arm which he's grasping hold of, pretty tight too. I yank it back once he releases a tiny bit.
"I don't have to answer anything you ask me. Just because we had one small conversation in the store room since what happened doesn't make us friends again, okay!" I order rather than question. Urgh that jerk I don't don't what I'm doing tomorrow let alone next bloody weekend!
"So I'll see you in class tomorrow," he shouts back "partner" he adds on as I turn around to see his smug face.
That's it I officially hate Bradley Anderson more than ever!
What am I going to do?
-~~~-
A/N: sorry this is a really late update but I was on holiday for a while anyways hope you enjoy.
