Middle is the New Beginning

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By some comical fate of the universe, Shaz seemed to be in all of my gen-ed classes. The only time I had a break from seeing him was in my class with Rasheed, ethics, and data structures. 

On Tuesday, Shaz sat right behind me in physics and typed loudly on his laptop. Wednesday, he and I both ended up at the same spot in the student center eating lunch. Thursday, he pretended like he was a sweat in English class. By Friday, I had had enough. 

I scowled at him across the room and cursed him under my breath in the seminar class all freshmen had to take. He seemed to be innocently doodling on his iPad, oblivious to everything else around him. The audacity of this man would never cease to amaze me. 

Whatever. I had an interview with Emily Stanford after this class for the team lead position, and I had to prep as best as I could. I rehearsed what I'd say to different interview questions I googled. I did a little snooping thanks to Rasheed and found all the people that were also interviewing for the spot. 

Camila Perez--sophomore, computer science major, and incredibly witty. She already had leadership positions in two other clubs; she was the president of a cultural club for spanish speakers and a secretary for a robotics club. I wasn't too worried about her. Emily and the board will see that she's too busy to lead a team. 

Michael Nguyen--senior, comp. media major, and the most quiet person I'd ever not heard speak. I wasn't worried about him either. He was too shy to be in a leadership spot. 

The person I was worried about, though, was Shaz. Although he didn't have much coding experience, he was charismatic, and he had a member on the board already on his side. I guess I did too, but I didn't underestimate that he could manage to convince other board members to vote for him. 

The bell snapped me out of my inner scheming. I closed my laptop, tucked it in my bag, and turned to leave (I always sat on the end of a row so I could leave quickly), but before I could make it out of my row of seats, Shaz's shoulder shoved me back while he sprinted up the stairs. 

He muttered a 'sorry' under his breath, but I knew he didn't mean it. What a jerk. I huffed, slung my bag on my shoulder, and headed out of the building. On my way out, I checked Emily's email to confirm the location of the interview. The Nexus? Where was that?

I glanced around my building. How was I going to find where this was and walk to it in fifteen minutes? 

"No way, pong girl?" 

I turned around and spotted short black hair and a cute sundress. 

"Hey! Sorry, I don't have time to talk right now," I said. "I have to find this building in fifteen minutes."

Anika took a peek over my shoulder at the name of the building, then laughed. "Are you trying to find the student hub?" she asked. I stared at her and blinked a few times. She just shook her head with a smile still on her face and pointed to the building in front of us. I made an 'o' shape with my mouth. 

Sure enough, on top of the doors leading in, huge silver letters spelled 'Nexus Commons.' All that stressing about seeing Shaz and failing the interview must've made me cluelessly oblivious. Ironic. 

My cheeks flushed, and I shook my head. "Oh wow... please pretend you didn't have to remind me of the location of a building right in front of me," I said. Anika laughed again and took up my arm while walking me to Nexus. Geez, did she think I was too braindead to walk on my own? I'd probably think the same thing if I was her. 

"I'm about to grab some lunch so we're headed in the same direction," she explained like she read the confusion on my face. 

I breathed out. As long as I didn't do anything that brainless in front of Emily, I felt decently prepared. I could do this. I straightened my clothes, took a deep breath, and entered Nexus with Anika flanking my side. 

          

She looked at me at the staircase, grabbed my shoulder, and said, "Don't stress about this. Good luck; you got this!" With that, she turned and headed down the stairs.

Emily scheduled the interview in one of the breakout rooms on the fourth floor of the building. By the time I climbed four flights of stairs, I felt out of breath. I held my knees for a few seconds and tried to breathe normally again. When I glanced up, I nearly fell back down the stairs. There, in one of the breakout rooms, Emily laughed at me through the glass. 

Oh God, I was making a fool of myself. I gave her a sheepish smile and half-walked, half-jogged up to the door. I tugged on the door handle, but it didn't open. I jiggled it a bit, and Emily got up from her seat to open the door for me. Oh... it pushed inward. 

Okay, not off to a great start, Nalini, I thought to myself when the door opened, and I darted in. 

"Nice to see you applying, Nalini. We need more girls in leadership positions in STEM. Take a seat, and we can get started," she said and returned to her seat. I sat in the chair opposite hers across the wood round table. I put my bag down on the floor next to me and sat up straight. 

"Okay, first question. Why do you think you're qualified to be a leader?" she asked. 

I took a moment to pretend to think while I had my answer locked and loaded on my tongue, ready to pull the trigger. "I think I'm qualified to lead a team in Game On! because I'm pretty adaptable to tough situations. Last year, our year had to organize a car wash as a charity even to raise funds for our town's homeless shelter.

"As the appointed leader of the planning committee, I had the job of allocating resources, assigning tasks, and making sure we had enough supplies. We ordered everything a month in advance, but the drying towels never came. Instead of going to buy more or delaying the event, I came up with the idea to have everyone bring an old shirt they didn't need anymore. After we finished the event, we washed all the shirts, and we were able to donate those to the shelter too," I finished with a confident beam on my face. 

Emily smiled back and jotted down a few things on a yellow notepad in front of her. "That's an impressive display of resourcefulness and community spirit," Emily remarked while scribbling on her page. "It's clear you can think on your feet, which is what a leader needs. Onto the next question." 

While Emily fired questions at me, I caught the bullets, chewed them up, and spit them out in almost-flawless answers. Until her last question. 

"This is my last question for you. Feel free to take your time to think about this before answering. How would you respond to an apology from somebody you still cannot forgive?"

My mind immediately jumped to Shaz and his half-assed apology earlier for bumping my shoulder. How the hell do I answer this? What was the right answer? All the other questions she asked had a clear cut and definitive answer. 

I felt heat creep up the back of my neck and spread over my cheeks. Think about anyone other than Shaz! Say anything, Nalini!

I could tell Emily expected an answer soon. Her head tilted to the side, and her eyebrows scrunched together while she watched me. 

One by one, my words stumbled over one another, tumbling out of my mouth. 

"I don't know... I would probably question whether they are actually sorry, and if they are, I'd forgive them."

Emily paused and rubbed her chin. "What about if they aren't?"

Oh God, another question I had no idea how to answer. "I'd just ignore them, I guess?" I tried. Emily's head lowered, and she scribbled a lot on her page. The room was silent except for the scratching sounds of pen on paper. 

"I also have tons of experience building in C# and Unity," I sputtered. Emily glanced up at my outburst, nodded, and smiled. But her smile didn't feel genuine. It felt like she was smiling out of pity for the girl who can't forgive. 

"Alright, Nalini. That's all I have for you today. Thanks for interviewing," she said, stood up, and tucked her notepad under her arm. 

I rose to my feet, grabbed my bag, and followed her out of the room. My head throbbed. I just fumbled that question so hard I could hear Faker at the 2016 "League of Legends" World Championship yelling at me. 

This was just as bad, maybe even worse, than spawning your team into enemy territory. I was going to lose to Shaz based on my own idiocy. 

I headed downstairs to look for Anika. I spotted her at a table in front of Sizzle Shack, a burger spot. She frowned when she spotted me and put down her sandwich. "You look like a deflated balloon. What happened?" she asked. 

As I began to recant exactly what happened, her eyes softened. "Aww, it's okay, Nalu. It's hard to get any leaderships spots as a freshman. It's impressive that they even considered you," she said and patted my shoulder. 

Anika took a big bite of her burger, and I nodded. She was right. To get so far as a freshman was still impressive. It just sucked knowing that Shaz might beat me to the position. 

"You should go get food and we should eat together," she said. I got out of my chair and glanced around for what I wanted. Panda Express? No, I'd had that yesterday. I wasn't feeling burgers either. Maybe pasta? 

I started to walk up to the line for Twisted Noodles, but as soon as I spotted who was last in line, I stopped. I turned back to Anika, prepared to tuck my tail in and run back to her table, but she waved me toward the line with such aggression I almost mistook her for an Indian tanty. 

Shaz had his arms crossed, and he stared up at the menu. With the resolve of a piece of cardboard, I sidled next to him in line. He didn't break his concentration while staring at the menu, but once he knew what he wanted, he glanced down at me and scowled. 

"What are you doing here?" he asked with a crinkled nose.

I rolled my eyes. "The same thing you're doing. Getting food. Or have you forgotten that other people exist around you?" 

He scoffed. "Please. I was here first. Go join your own line, Miss High and Mighty."

Me? High and mighty? I narrowed my eyes at him. "You've got some nerve. I'm not the one who joined a club my ex is passionate about just to see her with a different guy."

That one must've wounded his huge ego. His cheeks turned red, and he said, "Not everything revolves around you, Nalini."

"Sure, but you do." 

"Next!" the lady behind the counter shouted. We were at the front of the line. Shaz clenched his fists and cursed me under his breath while he walked up and placed his order. I couldn't help the small smirk that crept to my face seeing him have to concede. 

After he was done, he took his food and stormed off. I ordered, grabbed my food, and went back to where Anika was. She finished eating, and she was on her laptop working on something. 

"Who was that guy from earlier you didn't want to stand next to?" she asked me without glancing up from her screen. 

"The rudest and meanest person you'll ever have the displeasure of meeting," I spat out and opened my container of food. Anika whistled low, then asked, "You already have an enemy on the first week of classes?"

"He's my ex from high school," I explained. "He's just a classic case of inflated ego and misplaced entitlement."

Anika nodded in understanding. "Unfortunately, there are too many guys like that here. Don't let him get to you, either," she said. I took a bite of pasta. As much as I hated to admit it, seeing Shaz truly pissed me off. If only there was a way to get him to leave me alone. And never see him again. And maybe feed him to a pack of wild wolves.

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New chapter up! Thanks for reading y'all!

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⏰ Last updated: May 13, 2024 ⏰

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