𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐃 - 𝘴. 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘥

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞

"Do I really have to go there mommy?" Elena looked at her mother, hopeful that she'll let her go play with other kids. "We talked about this", Ellas's mother looked at her sternly before continuing, "you want to make something of yourself, don't you?" The question made Ella's brows furrow. She didn't understand. She was only six, why did she have to this? Ella gave the playground last gloomy look before following her mother into the building.

"Next!", someone yelled so loudly Ella flinched. As she looked around all she saw were other kids, but all of them seemed to want to be here. Ella felt confused. Was there something wrong with her? She wanted to cry. "Ella!", she felt a cold palm hit her head, "don't you dare embarrass me," her mother sternly said.

 Ella knew she had to put her big girl face on, she was one after all. She never understood her mother. She knew she was some sort of pageant queen, but after she met Ella's father, all she did was stay home. That's when Ella realised. This was a casting. She looked at her mother, tears forming in the corners of her eyes, but she knew it was hopeless. Whatever her mother put her mind to, she had. Ella knew there was no way out. She should just close her mouth and get trough this.

"Now just walk down this platform and at the end smile and do some poses. Understand?" Ella closely listened to her mother. No words of encouragement, no loving mother behavior. Ella nodded. The faster she'll do this the faster it'll be over. Deep breath in, deep breath out.

 Ella turned to the platform, put her biggest smile on, and started walking down it. At the end behind a table sat two men and a woman. Ella smiled and waved at them. The man on the right looked at her judgingly before writing something into his notepad. Ella could feel her smile fading but luckily she caught herself just in time and plastered it right back on. She put her hands on her hips, as she practiced a million times with her mom. Then she turned around and did a little bow. Then she turned around and confidently walked away. Her mother waited for her, looking anything but proud.

Have I done something wrong? Ella thought.

Her mother thanked the assistant before dragging Ella out by her arm. Incredibly confused, Ella followed her, trying to figure out what she has done wrong now. Once they reached the car, her mother stashed Ella into the backseat before sitting behind the steering  wheel. "Mom?" Ella asked, "are you okay?" Her mother looked at her trough the front mirror. No answer. Just silence. Once they reached their house Elena's mother got out without any word, closed the door and went inside. Ella followed, like she has a million times before.

Over the years, Ella has signed with five different agencies.

 Her mother was obssesed. 

Reenacting her missed years, putting the pressure on her daughter. Now fifteen, Ella could not look at herself. After years of torture, she could not eat, or think nicely about herself. Ella sighed, fixing her hair and reapplying her lipstick one last time before standing up and turning to the long mirror in her dressing room. 

The gown was silk, cream and had lace all over it. Heels made her at least five centimeters taller. She slid her hands down the sides of her gown. 

Looking at herself, all she saw has ugliness.

 She quickly turned away from the mirror, and started deeply breathing. It took a lot of self control to not run straight to the toilet. Suddenly a knock pulled her out of the trance. "Come in," the words sounded forced. And they were. Why couldn't people just leave her alone. "Elena. Give me a spin so I can check you," the voice made the hairs on her arms stand up even before she saw who was behind it. She saw her mother in the mirror reflection, standing in the doorway, waiting. Obediently, Ella gave her mother a spin. "Fine. Let's go now," the woman was already racing out of the dressing room. Ella had gotten used to the drill. For the past years, she has done nothing else but this. Runway shows, photoshoots, you name it, shee has done it. Her mother's obssesion with reenacting her missed years on Ella has severed so much that Ella couldn't do anything. She couldn't go out with her 'friends', couldn't eat anything she liked. She couldn't dress  however she wanted.