2 ~ Many Tears

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!!!There's a question in authors note–please read it!!!

Hello <3, long time no seen! The last time I wrote something was maybe 11 months ago - I had the first chapter always in my drafts, and now I try to continue !!<3
Because we did it in the first book, I would like to ask questions before the chapter starts ! ^^

•Question of the day : Have you ever travelled to another country?
•Me: Yup! I was in the Turkey :>

________

I couldn't look away. Why the hell was he crying. He looked like he was about to choke from his own tears. My head hurts. Why was I even feeling this? Was I supposed to feel this way? Was it normal? Why was no one guiding me? Why am I left alone with these new feelings and body without somebody taking the lead for me?
Before I could even continue to think about such questions , I felt my eyes go black. What was happening..?

.....

I heard voices. Once again. I slightly open my eyes. I was on the ground. The boy was close to me. Was he touching me? I believe I just felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Which demon manages to faint? Is that even possible? I felt so tired.
The last thing I felt was someone dragging me.

.....

Once again, I open my eyes to yelling. An old man was talking down on the boy who cried before. Next to them was the girl. She kept her silence. But I could tell she was letting things build up in herself. I was laying on something comfortable, I think I was in a small house – when did I even get here? And why was I here?
But then I noticed those strings over me – were they holding me down? – I couldn't hear everything they said even tho I was really close to them.

"Sabito, I'm disappointed." The man said,  he sounds so mean. "I'm sure we can save h-" The boy tried, but this time the girl spoke up. "Just shut it! There's no way we could save him." Save him? Who?

"We will kill him." The old man whispered , the boys breath hitched. "NO-" I could tell he was close to crying. I wonder if this boy was always this emotional. Every time I looked at him, he was crying. I remember that crying was nice a long time ago. It helps us recover from sad events. But why was this boy crying over and over again? Something really bad must have happened to him. Poor boy.

"[inaudible sentences]" I wonder what the girl just whispered. She looked so serious. My vision was blurry. I hate this feeling. No. I hate feelings in general. I don't understand them. Why should we need them? In the end, you get disappointed – I believe you get a good example if you look at the boy who was crying. In my opinion, feelings aren't good for humans – wait , why do I even care what's good for humans? I'm no human no more. I shouldn't care about them. I shouldn't care why the boy feels so familiar.

Before I could continue thinking those thoughts,  my vision fainted again even tho I had the feeling that my wounds were healing – slowly. I could hear yelling. I could feel something on my cold body.

.....

"I'm sorry, Giyuu.. I-.." Someone said, but it came out like whimpering. Someone was again apologising to me. Why in the hell was he doing that? Who was he again?

My eyes were still closed. I felt how my body was moving. Was I getting carried? Wait,  was there something in my mouth? What the hell? What was that? What the hell was going on – I want to wake up out of this nightmare! Make it stop already. I've seen enough! I hate how this person is crying and saying sorry for things I don't even know for! I hate how I kept on fainting! I hate this pain in my chest! It felt like I wanted to cry out, but something inside of me held me back – did I just say I wanted to cry? Why should I even cry? For what reason? I'm sure the boy had a better reason to cry.

I opened my eyes , I had something bamboo alike in my mouth. I could bite on it. I felt like toddler, you could say. There was this boy again. He really carried me – He had this sad and exhausting smell on him. He must really feel ,,blue. " I wonder what kind of thing must happen to a soul to feel such depressing feelings like this. I hate whenever he looks at me. Those eyes. Oh, those eyes.. those annoying grayish lavender eyes filled with tears.
Those eyes I wish to scratch and destroy – looking at me as if I did something wrong.
Why would he even dare to look at me this way , this goddamn way! I hated everything about it! They remind me of something I once knew and I feel like I even liked it! It just hurts me!

I try to move but he was carrying me tightly. It was night time of course. If I saw it correct he'd only have a small sword. Was he aiming for suicide? He was fresh meat. If I weren't so weak , I would have killed him.
..
For sure
...
Probably
....
Maybe
.....
..Maybe?
......

I think I made my choice. I would kill him.. I made my choice.. for sure. Do all demons think about killing someone for so long? Do some overthink it ? They do that for sure. I'm sure – I guess I'm sure?.. Of course I'm sure!

"We survive this together – Giyuu!.. Even if Urokodaki doesn't want us! We survive this alone! I won't let you down! They can't just take you away.. Not my precious Giyuu.." He made me so sad. With all his talking and I couldn't do anything about it , I felt so weak.

He was holding it in, but he was failing. I wonder how many tears he can cry. It seems like there's no limit.  The frustration in their eyes was clear, as if each tear was a betrayal of their attempts to regain control. He had been crying all day, his sobs relentless and loud – his tears an endless stream as they fell throughout the day.

"

This is all my fault.. if I– If I just paid more attention, you wouldn't turn into THIS. But it's okay- it's okay - it's okay, Giyuu! I promise I still love you - You're not ugly in my eyes. " Who was he trying to flatter? Why did he even know my name. Why did he dare to use MY name in those depressing sentences. I hate this. I hate.. everyone. I hate the world. I hope one day that the demons show the humans who is stronger. Humans are pathetic.  They don't know real pain. This boy probably doesn't know what he's crying for. Or at least his reason wasn't that painful.. getting turned into a demon is what shows you what pain feels like. You're dying to come back like a stronge creature. You're able to show the one you once loved that you're now stronger. That you can give them the world. I wished I had this kind of someone. I would give them the entire world. Instead, I have to get carried by a stranger who dares to abuse my name in his sad sentences. It was like a storm that refused to pass, each sob rolling in like thunder. Or  like being stuck in a downpour with no umbrella, every sniffle and gasp grating on my nerves.


If I ever get my strength back , I will eat him.

_____

Thanks for every vote! It really motivates me<3

Yayy new chapter!
What do we think? Did we like it? Was it too boring? I would give it a 5/10 xd
I try to make the next Chapters way longer (':


‼️Question : Since Giyuu is the demon in here – what hashira should meet Sabito and Giyuu in the woods? I was thinking about maybe Muichiro or maybe Mitsuri?
What would you like more? Or do you have another Hashira? Please tell me :) I need it for the next chapter probably 🤍 OH AND – what do you think of the book cover?^^

You have ideas for the Storyline/How the next Chapters continue? Go on and tell me about it! I'm open for any kind of ideas for the Story ^^!!

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