Awkward

Seeing Mom

Rose's POV
What does a girl do, when she likes a guy, but doesn't know if it's right. "Oh if only you could talk Winnie. I'm sure you give great doggy advice." She sniffed my hand and laid back down. "Well you're no help. I have to think of something else."

I did. I started thinking about my mom. She took me away from my awful dad, she's such a good person. I know she's in there. She's had a while in rehab, and I had a strong urge to go see her.

"Uncle Mike?" I asked as I went downstairs. "Yes star?" I sat down on his work bench as he built Lord knows what. "I, uh, want to do something." He glanced at me, smiling. "Anything." I bit my lip. "Can I go see my mom?" His eyes widened as his head flew up. "Um, not so sure that's a good idea little star." I fiddled with my thumbs. "I need to do this Uncle Mike. More then you understand." He sighed. "If you feel it's right, I can drive you." I shook my head. "No that's okay. I can have a.... friend take me." He shrugged. "If you're sure." I nodded. "I am."

The phone was ringing, and I hoped he would pick up. He picked up on the second ring. "Oh my gosh Rose! Hi! How are you?" I sighed. "Listen Devon. I need a favor as a friend, not as anything else. A friend." He seemed disappointed but complied. "Okay. What is it?" I licked my lips. "I need you to take me to the rehab center where my mom is." There was silence for a long time, then, "If you think it's best." I nodded, even though I knew he couldn't see me. "I do. Come to the park right away." I hung up right then and there, and headed out the door.

I sat on a bench by the road. "Where is he?" I said to myself. Then I saw his car pull up. He got out as I stood. "Hey Rose!" He tried to slip his arm around my shoulders but I pushed him away. "No thanks. I don't need sympathy." He looked hurt. "I was just trying to..." "It's fine." I cut him off. I climbed into his car and didn't say anything.

"Fight Song" came on my Rachel Platten. I loved this song, and couldn't resist humming along. When I realized Devon had no reaction I sang the actual words. I put all my emotions into my voice. It always helps, and I realized I hadn't sung in a long time. It always made me feel better. I can't believe I had forgotten that.

When the song ended, I glanced over at Devon again. He was looking at me and smiling. "Not a word." I warned, and turned to look out the window.

We got in the parking lot. "Why didn't you ask Ruby?" He asked. "Hmm?" I said, not really listening. "Why didn't you ask Ruby to come with you?" I snapped out of it. "Oh. Because Ruby knows I hate sympathy so she wouldn't give it to me. I might need it." I said, not really thinking. My eyes were on the small building. It looked so sad from her. A small, rusty white building that had the horrible word, Rehab, written on it.

I took a shaky breath, taking a step back. "Can you do this?" He asked me. I grabbed his shoulder. "I can. I need you to be there. I need it really bad. All the time. Don't leave my side. Can you do that??" He nodded, but didn't respond. I took my hair from its braid and put it up in a ponytail, and adjusted my glasses. "Let's do this." I started walking towards the scary building.

I walked to the desk, Devon not far behind me. "Um hi. Can you get me Sharon please?" She glanced up at me. "You her daughter Rose?" The African American lady asked. "Yes." She started typing. "Can you prove it?" She asked. "Excuse me?" She looked up at me, annoyed. "Can you prove it?" I sighed. "Um, her middle name is Elizabeth." the lady shrugged. "Good enough. Go down the hallway, first door on your right. Your boy there can't come." He was about to protest but I stopped him. "I can do this." He seemed reluctant, but sat in the lobby.

The room was kind of like an interrogation room. Concrete walls, a single bulb hanging from the ceiling, it was almost laughable.

She came in, and I took a sharp breath. She was wearing blue clothes that made her look like she was in prison. I almost cried as she looked at me with admiration. She sat down. "Oh sweetie." I held a hand up. "I'm only here so you can tell me what you wanna tell me. That's it. Then I'm leaving." She sighed. "Okay. I want to explain everything. Yes, I have been drinking lately. I'm so sorry, work has been so hard lately, and being a parent is harder then you think. I attacked you, I reopened your ugly scar, and I feel awful. I couldn't feel worse. But I have to stay in here. I'm not better yet, and it'll take months, possibly years. But I still love you." I felt my ear, still roughly stitched, supposed to be taken out in a few days. Then I felt my cheeks, wet, from crying. "Thanks mom. Gotta go bye!!" I ran to the door, but before I went she yelled at me. "Wait!! Don't you love me too??" I looked at her, my vision blurred by the salt water out to spill over. "I don't know anymore."

I ran out, not looking where I was going. I ran into the parking lot and stopped by a random car, breaking down and sobbing. I felt a hand on my shoulder but I pushed it away. "I don't need any help!!" I put my hands over my eyes and sobbed some more. The hands tried to get me to stand but I struggled against them. "Rose stop pushing me away!!" I struggled against him until I couldn't anymore. I broke down and put all my weight against Devon.

He held me while I cried. I was blurting out nonsense. "She didn't mean it!" Sobbing. "She still loves me!!" Crying. "She's an alcoholic!!" One hand was rubbing my back, the other was patting my hair. I hadn't realized we were on a bench till the tears stopped flowing. Even though I had stopped crying I pulled Devon closer to me.

"Are my stitches really that ugly?" I asked, laughing an empty and snotty laugh afterwards. He smiled and pulled away, looking at my ear. His fingertips grazed the stitches. "I think it's one of the best things about you." I put my forehead on his shoulder. "Thank you for being here." He rubbed my back again. "I wouldn't have it any other way."
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Sorry I haven't updated!!! Sorry about any typos!!! Sorry about a lot of things!!! Just, sorry about everything. K?? Okay cool. Thanks for reading!!
@KS