Lost boys

Nothing but hell

Dean got home to his father screaming loudly. Sam wasn't home yet so he was probably drunk and started getting upset about every possible thing. He closed the door behind him and walked straight into his room. He put his bag down and then looked out for his father. "Get here misfit." He yelled. As his father told him, Dean walked over to him. "You know what shit I got in the mail today?!" He yelled at Dean. "How should I know, asshole." Dean replied coldly. Then his father held up a picture of Dean and Cas. How the hell did he get this photo? And mostly, did he have to remind him of everything? "You kissed a fucking boy and with that picture someone wrote on a letter that she heard that you were fucking him?! What is wrong with you?! You aren't my son. You're a worthless piece of shit. I should've killed you when your mom died. Why don't you die already!" John screamed into Dean's face and started beating him up once again. Dean didn't do a single thing to protect himself. A few days after Castiel left, his father came home and everything started again. This time even worse. John was beating Dean up for about 5 minutes until he stopped and left. Tears started running down Dean's cheeks. Slowly he managed to stand up again and walked straight into the bathroom where he locked himself. He moved the mirror a little and opened the little hiding spot he had. Dean took out his beloved blade and closed everything. Then he sank to the ground and lifted up the sleeve of his sweater. He looked at his arm that was already filled with scars. Today it has been a year since Castiel disappeared and Dean got this kind of depression. His life went to its lowest point. He was caught in a deep dark hole and he couldn't make it out alone.

Only a few months ago he firstly tried to commit suicide. He couldn't take the pressure his Dad gave him. He couldn't ignore him saying that he should die anymore. Dean started to do self harm when he just couldn't take all of the mental pain anymore. Dean lost a lot of weight and his skin got unhealthy pale. You could even say he had fifty shades of dark circle under his eyes. It was also already known that Dean had to repeat that school year because he only got worse at school after Cas left. It broke him more than he expected.
Dean placed his blade on his arm. Only a few cuts. He thought. Every cut went deeper and deeper. Slowly he stood up and placed his arm into the sink. It felt refreshing and he could finally breath out. Suddenly someone hammered against the bathroom door. "Dean open up I know you're in there." His little brother yelled. Dean didn't want Sammy to see him like that again. The only reason Dean's suicide attempt failed, was Sam finding him. He knew that his little brother suffered a lot under Dean's depression. Besides that he was still hurt about Gabriel. His class mates started bullying him again when they found out that Gabriel was gone. At least their Dad left him alone. But for that Dean suffered twice. "Dean, please." Sam whined. Fast Dean hid his blade and pulled down his sleeve. He cleaned the sink and then unlocked the door. Sam opened it and looked at his older brother. "I was just refreshing." Dean put on a fake smile. Sam only looked at him and it seemed like he didn't believe a single word. "Why are you lying to me?" Tears escaped Sam's eyes. "I'm no lying." Dean told. Then Sammy suddenly gripped his arm and pulled Dean's sleeve up. "Oh really?" He cried. Dean didn't know what to say and just faced the ground. "I'm sorry." He told. "Don't say you're sorry when you're not." Sam pulled Dean towards the toilet and made him sit down. He took the med kit and took out some bandages. First Sam cleaned the cuts and washed the blood away, then he bandaged Dean's arm. Dean left everything uncommented since everything he said was wrong anyways.

Another unnecessary day of school started for Dean. His first period was P.E. and today of all days he felt like totally shit. He changed into his P.E. clothes in the bathroom like every other day. "Today we're running 40 minutes straight. If anyone walks we'll add 5 minutes." The teacher ordered. Then he counted down and everyone started running. The first ten minutes went good for Dean. But after that he slowly felt sick and like throwing up. It got hard for him to breath and he almost didn't feel his legs anymore until he collapsed. "Keep running!" He heard the teacher yell to the other students before he blacked out. When he woke up he felt his head aching. He took a look around and noticed he was in infirmary. He stood up and looked for someone around. "Hello?" He asked and a teacher came up to him. "Oh you're awake finally. We tried to reach your father but he didn't pick up. Are you able to get home alone?" She asked. "I'll stay in school till it ends. I'll go home with my brother then." Dean answered and just left for his next period. He ignored all the looks he got from those other students. They didn't matter to him for once. He walked up to his history class and just waited for it to start.

Finally the last bell rang and school was over. Dean took his stuff and walked out of the room but outside in the hallway Abaddon and her sweet little minions were waiting. "Deano, come here." She grinned. "Just leave me the fuck alone." Dean mumbled and kept walking. "Did your Dad get my letter?" She still grinned. Now Dean stopped walking and turned around to face her. "It was you?!" He asked angrily. "I guess he wasn't so happy about seeing his son kissing another boy. And hearing of him sleeping with another boy." She told. "What do you fucking want Abaddon." Dean was annoyed. "I want you to be my boyfriend." She commanded. "Never in my life." Dean replied and just left. Outside he could already see his brother waiting. He walked over to him and they made their way home. "I've heard you collapsed in P.E. today. Are you alright?" Sam asked. "I'm better." Dean replied. He seriously felt a little better now. When they were in front of their house, Dean took out his keys to unlock the door when someone behind them started calling for them. "Sam, Dean!" The voice yelled. Then Dean turned around and he couldn't believe who he saw standing there.