Capturing Ella

Chapter 23 - Ella

8:21pm, the same day.

I stood at the Wokingham train station that night after spending nearly six hours shopping in the old Wokingham town. Is it shopping if you didn't buy anything? I mean, the only thing I actually brought was a bottle of water to try and take sips of. I have no idea what is wrong with me; one second I am completely fine and the next second I am hit with a wave of nausea, and not only that I went really dizzy and light headed. I think the worst had passed, but it left me with a crashing headache but with no desire to go back to Michael's to rest. I knew I had to keep going and stay away to normal times as if I had my nap now, I'd be completely screwed for the rest of the morning. So I hit Wokingham town, half it a maze of Victorian-styled buildings which had been converted into chain shops, charity shops or individually, family-run shops which I had great pleasure snooping around, and thinking about what Joe had said to me.

What I did at the train station was completely uncalled for and I regretted the slutty part of me who thought it was a good idea to kiss him. I don't even know why I thought it was a good idea. Why did I think it was a good idea? I guess it was because everything he said had talked me out of my total indecision to not tell him about the Soulfinder thing. I thought if I tested the water he would force me to tell him and it would confirm the idea that he was a prick and it would be fine. But when he said to me if I didn't want to tell him then don't. Then when I kept trying to make him say something that would classify him as a prick, he said the completely right answer and I couldn't help myself. I started to crave Joe's closeness to me. When he held my hand, then had his arm around my waist it felt completely normal and it grounded the sense of panic I had in my chest for the last few months. When I went dizzy and he hugged me, I knew there wasn't too much behind it and he was just making sure I was okay but I enjoyed it. I never wanted him to let go.

The train from Reading station pulled up into Platform 1, and I walked up a few meters to the door, hitting the button to open the door. I jumped into the carriage, and slid into the seats near the door, putting my backpack on the seat next to me. I was only on this train for one stop – six minutes – from Wokingham to Bracknell train station, where I would get off and walk for another half an hour down into the quieter area of town where Michael lives. I sat on the edge of the chair, hands in the praying gesture even though I wasn't religious over my mouth as I felt slightly sick again. Probably should have got Xav to check me out for any illnesses before I left. But he kept telling me that I was still throwing off interference, and it was the same around Vick. It was probably just because I had got better at shielding so he couldn't use his gift on me when I wasn't expecting it.

I rubbed my back slightly, flinching. Gently, I closed my eyes and when I held my shirt up slightly I could see the bruise that had formed when I got shot in the back when Jake passed the zip wire more than five seconds after I did – which counted as me running off. However, as I flinched he laughed so hard he fell off the platform and they continued to shoot the soft paintballs at me, coving me in these pound-size bruises. It was hilarious, though, and gave Jake and I a good time to catch up in everything without our brothers prying in. He told me all about the twins, who were now four months old, and how Joe wasn't really himself – not until they mentioned me coming here. Jake joked about him having a crush on me.

'Next station: Bracknell' the train voice said, and I grabbed my backpack. It was quite heavy where I had brought my carry-on items; purse and phone, a spare change of clothes which I was wearing now and my sweaty running gear was shoved down to the bottom, my laptop in that dedicated department and toiletries. There were some other bits and bobs but I couldn't remember exactly what was in there, apart from now it was doubling as a turtle shell. I watched as the train slowed down dramatically, pulling into the station and demonstrating the service yard for the retail park that was near the station. I stood up as the platform approached and walked to the door, hitting the button so it would open, before jumping off holding my phone in my pocket just in case it would fall out and head towards the tracks.