Soul Nate

Christmas

"Nattie?" I demanded, staring at him with a mix of shock, hurt, and dread. Shock, because I totally wasn't expecting him to pop up here, hurt because just looking at him made my heart feel like it was breaking, and dread because once again, just looking at him made me realize I might never get over him.

"Amy?" He said again. He chuckled nervously, running a hand through his hair. "Um. What are you doing here?"

I raised an eyebrow. I know they say there's no stupid questions, but please. I was wearing a freaking apron that said Starbucks! "I work here now."

He nodded and glanced over towards the window. I followed his gaze. Everyone else was sitting there too, talking and whatnot.

"Espressos, yeah?" I asked, ringing it up.

He nodded as I took the money, being careful to not let our hands brush.

He sat down with everyone and I turned around before anyone could see me.

"Amy?" Sean asked, shooting me a worrying look. "Are you okay?"

I blinked back tears. "I will be in a minute."

He gave me a brief hug as I made their coffee, writing his name down on the tops of the cups.

Once they were all made, I popped them on a tray and headed towards the booth. Damn them. Damn Nattie and his 'friendly' feelings. Damn my so called friends who failed to talk to me for a month. I didn't need them. I didn't need anyone! I could work at Starbucks and finish school and die alone and nobody would know I was dead until three months later and my cats ate my body.

I had to stop that horrible day mare and smiled (fakely) at Them. It was right now a battle between Us (a.k.a Sean and I) and Them (Rachel, Emily, Will, Nate, Jack, Andrew and him).

"Here are your drinks!" I announced perkily, setting a cup down in front of each of them.

"Amy?" Rachel demanded.

I smiled at her. "That's me."

"Wow! Um, what are you doing here?"

Seriously? Isn't it obvious? Jeez. "I work here," I attempted to smile again but it came off more as a grimace.

"Oh," Will said. "Cool."

Hmm, yes. That's what I thought. After, you know, getting over the fact that my heart was stomped on and thrown across the floor. Not that I'm bitter. Did you know that after Chile won the sea from Bolivia, Bolivia was exceedingly bitter and made a Sea Day and stuff so they're memory could be refreshed of when Chile stole it.

Anyways. The point is, I can't be Bolivia. No one likes Bolivia now.

"Are you doing anything for Christmas?" Emily asked.

I shook my head. "No."

"Do you want to come over to my place? It's just sort of an intimate get together, just us. Everyone usually spends the night," she said, laughing.

I saw Nattie shake his head at her. Well, if it made him annoyed...

"I'd love to," I announced. "See you then."

I waved goodbye and re joined Sean at the counter.

*

What does one wear to an intimate Christmas party held by the friend of your ex-boyfriend? Well, Vogue didn't have the answers, that was for sure. I went with dark wash jeans, since I read somewhere that they could be fancy if the occasion called for and this cranberry colored sweater that was weirdly thin to be called a sweater. Style these days. Pssh.