Green for good?!

The last day of being a 'Miss'

This was it. The first day of the rest of her life.... of their rest of THEIR lives. She'd finally found complete, simple, happiness. On that fateful day in April she'd never dreamed that those green eyes that she loved so much would be the ones that she'd spend the rest of her life looking into. But they were. And she couldn't be happier.

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"So, how are you feeling?" Lucy asked, her perfectly plucked eyebrow raised and her lips curved into smirk. "I'm... I'm good. Nervous, excited- everything you'd expect really." Came Caitlin's response as she jiggled her knee up and down. It was a nervous habit of hers. "You are the worst liar! You're shaking like a leaf. God, the way you're acting I'd think it's more likely you were being sent to join a cult, than get married!" Lucy remarked. Caitlin rolled her eyes and tutted at her best friend. "Shut up! You'd be nervous too if you were getting married at 19 and had a 18 month old son!" "Ok, ok, you're right I would! You don't, have any regrets do you? You do love Jackson. Right?!" "Lucy!!!" Caitlin exclaimed. "Of course I don't have any regrets. My life is hard, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I love my two boys. Jackson and Austin are my life now!" "Ok. good. Wow! That's a relief, you had me worried for a second there." "God, you're so dramatic Luce. I'm fine, ok? Now can you please stop stressing me out on my special day. Go do something useful." Caitlin ordered, but her tone didn't match her expression. She was wearing a sad, distanced mask on that dainty face of hers. "Cate? Honey? What's up? Why are you so sad?" "I just wish Erin was here, you know. Almost every moment we had together was spent planning our weddings. Now my wedding day is here and she- well, she's not. And that's not right. Or fair. It hurts. And all I want is for Jackson and Austin to be here comforting me. But I know what you're gonna say- 'the bride and groom aren't to see each other until the ceremony'." Lucy wiped the tears from her best friends face and tucked her hair behind her hair. "I think we can make an exception." She said softly. "You're right, he's good for you. They both are." Caitlin gave her best friend a huge hug. "Thank you." "You're welcome sweetie. I'll go give Jackson a call." She began to walk away. "Wait!" Lucy turned around expectantly. "You're the best friend I could have asked for. I don't thank you enough for always being here for me. I don't know what I'd do without you." "Me neither! But who are you marrying today; me or Jackson?!" She winked playfully. "No, I'm kidding. It's my pleasure. I love you Cate." "I love you too Lu."

Caitlin was splitting her time between eavesdropping on Lucy's phone conversation with Jackson and getting dressed. Since it was only 10am, it was socially acceptable for her to have been in a nightgown until now. She wore a cream three-quarter length dress with blue swallows scattered on it. To accessorize, she hurriedly fastened a black patent onto her waist, pearl stud earrings, blue peep toe heels and a blue cross-body bag. As she rushed out the house she heard Lucy call her name, but she didn't stop. She had to go. Now, before it was too late.

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As she walked she began to wonder if Lucy was right to be concerned. Was she having doubts? There was no logical reason why she should be; she loved Jackson and she felt safe, and happy with him. So why was she running? She was scared. That was the answer Caitlin herself decided on. At 19, most teenagers are getting drunk and passign out on the sofas of random strangers at parties. But Caitlin was 19 going on 30; she was washing up, cooking dinner, changing nappies and sampling foods for her wedding meal. It was all too much too soon. She was still going to married, that hadn't changed. She just needed to step back, take a beat. Have some time to herself. So, she popped into Starbucks and drank coffee. Alone. She felt like a strange mixture of a 5 year old and a 80 year old. She was lost and scared, and yet she felt as though hot drinks and scones were the best parts of life.