There's no forcing back the bile now.
Vomit stains my shirt front as I lay her gently on the ground to search the car for her cellphone.
She needs help fast or she won't make it.
I tear through the bags in her car violently until finally my hand is grasping the cold metal of the phone. She has two missed calls from home...
Or she won't make it.
The thought brings me to my knees and I dial as quickly as I can, fingers shaking.
"Come on, come one. Fuck!"
A dispatcher finally answers on the other end , but she has a million questions that I can't answer, and I'm losing patience fast.
'How long has she been unconscious?' 'Where did she hit her head?'
Doesn't she fucking understand that we need help?
"I don't have time for fucking small talk" I scream at her. "I need someone here now!"
My outburst doesn't seem to shake her because her voice remains calm as she asks me to stay on the phone until the ambulance arrives.
I hang up, anyway. I can't focus on her right now. I need to get back to Lily.
The bleeding from her head seems to have slowed, but I press the edge of my t shirt against the gash anyway keeping pressure on it as gently as I can.
She still feels so cold. Everything about this is wrong. Lily is always warm. I rub my free hand up and down her arm vigorously, trying to bring some life back to her. But it's no use. I'm as frozen as she is.
And pale. She's so pale, she looks almost...
She looks dead my mind finishes for me.
I can't afford to think that way now. I already can't breathe and I need to stay awake until I know she's safe.
I hug her closer to my chest and press my lips to her ear.
"Lily? It's me, it's Noah. I need you to wake up for me. Please, wake up. I am so so sorry, Lily. I swear to God I will make this up to you. You're going to be okay. I just need you to open your eyes. Please. I love you. Please open your eyes."
My eyes are wet and the pain in my chest is suffocating. If she can hear me at all, there's no indication. She doesn't make a sound except for her small breaths.
I hold her until I see the lights of the ambulance reach us. It's barely a minute before the paramedics run towards us and pull her away from me.
I've never felt so empty.
I try to keep my eyes on her as they work quickly around her, but a cop gets in my way. He's hurling questions at me, but I can't focus.
That is until I feel his arms clamp down hard on my shoulders and shake my whole body.
"What the fuck, man?" I try to pry his hands off of me so I can get my view of Lily back, but it's no use. He's not letting go.
He looks pissed. "Look kid. You've been ignoring me for five minutes, here. Who are you and why are you here, tonight?"
I still don't answer him. I can't focus on his bullshit right now. He looks like he's about to hit me, and I'm planning to let him.
"Back off the kid, now" another voice yells. My shoulders burn when he releases me.
I look around to find who the voice came from when I see another officer walking towards us. I've seen his face before, but I can't place it.
"Hey Noah, you okay buddy?" he asks me, and I'm about to tell him that I am so not fucking okay when I stop.
Wait a damn minute. What? Did he just call my name?
"How the hell do you know my name?"
For a second I panic, trying to imagine what I could have done that he knows who I am but I forget that quickly when I see them move Lily's body into the ambulance.
I move to follow them when his hand comes to my chest, holding me back.
"I'm sorry. I'm Officer Rhodes. I responded to your brother's...accident last year? I'm the one who brought you home."
Is this guy kidding? Not the fucking time, man.
"Listen, Noah, did you see what happened here, tonight? We can't seem to understand how this young lady lost control of her car."
"Lily. Her name is Lily" I tell him, ignoring his question.
I'm what happened. And I need to go with her.
"You know this girl?" He seems surprised.
"Yes." I spit through my teeth. I want to ask him how the fuck else I would know her name, but I refrain. This guy is really starting to piss me off. Just like the dispatcher. Perfect time to play twenty fucking questions.
My anger dissipates, replaced by panic when the paramedics close the doors to the ambulance and climb into the front seats. I realize that this guy is my only shot of getting to the hospital and I need to cooperate.
I take a deep breath and begin to speak. Part of me wants to spill my soul right here, but now isn't the time to get arrested. Not without knowing what happened to Lily. So I lie.
"I don't know what happened" I tell him. "I was sitting by those trees and she just swerved and hit the tree."
Fuck.
The words taste like blood in my mouth, but I keep my voice steady. I'll turn myself in as soon as I know she's okay.
"What were you doing in the woods" he asks me. There's no accusation in his voice. Just curiosity.
"I've come here a lot. Since, you know..." this time I give him the truth.
He gives me a knowing look and then his eyes follow mine to the ambulance pulling away.
"Look" he says, "why don't I give you a ride up to the hospital and we can talk on the way?"
Thank God.
"Yea...okay."
I have no intention of talking to this guy. But I need him.
I have to get to her.
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What Are the Odds?
RomanceNoah destroys every life he touches. Taking his first life with his own first breath, his path of destruction only spirals from there. Consumed by guilt and reminded every day of all that he's done, he makes a terrible decision- and ends up with the...