"Come on, bro," Don said to Mikey, who was still sulking, his beak scrunching up as he scowled at his older brothers, "It's just a video."
"Yeah, that a million people have watched," Mikey complained, frowning at the computer as if it had personally offended him.
"At least yer a star now," Raphael smirked, "Almost as good as bein' a superhero, ain't it?"
"Oh, shut it, Raph," Mikey snapped instinctively, the words spilling from his mouth before he could stop them. He instantly regretted his slip-up as Raphael rounded on him.
"What did ya say?" Raphael growled, sparks practically flying from his fiery eyes, as his fingers curled into fists.
"Nothing," Mikey said quickly, wishing he would learn when to shut his mouth.
"At least I'm not stupid enough to hide in a punchin' bag," Raphael said contemptuously.
"At least I didn't get beat up by a prostitute!"
"It wasn't a prostitute! It was a...uh...a tentacle...monster...thing."
"Yeah, getting felt up by a tentacle monster is so much better!"
"They do know that never actually happened, right?" Leo asked Don quietly.
"Do you want to tell them?" Don replied, casting a quick glance at the bickering turtles.
"Not really," Becca sighed, "Just start another video. Maybe it will drown them out." Amazingly enough Mikey and Raphael fell quiet as the theme music started to play.
A dark street is shown with only a single streetlight illuminating a newsstand. A paper delivery truck zooms by, horn blaring, and a stack of newspapers is dropped carelessly on the sidewalk. The front headline reads in bold letters: Monsters.
"Not another monster breakout," Mikey moaned, "I had enough of that to last me a lifetime after..." Mikey trailed off awkwardly, giving Don a nervous glance. An
uncomfortable silence lingered in the air as Leo, Raphael, and Mikey gave each other knowing looks, while Don stared intently at his hands.
The camera pans to a slightly open manhole with sensors and a red laser beam protecting the entrance. Another laser beam is shown in the sewers, the walls decorated with arrow-shaped signs that read "Monster Food." Several amateur traps lie around the lair with various junk food being used as bait.
"Huh," Don said thoughtfully, "Actually, laser beams aren't such a bad idea. I'm sure I could-"
"Save it for later, genius," Raphael interrupted impatiently, effectively wiping out the remaining tension in the room.
Raphael released a content sigh in his bed, a small smile on his face.
"Aww, you look so cute, Raphie," Mikey teased, poking teasingly at his didn't get a chance to respond before the next image appeared on the screen.
Leo snored lightly, his muscular arms wrapped around a worn-out teddy bear missing an eye.
"Stop the video," Mikey said. Don clicked the pause button, nothing being said as everyone continued to gawk at the image of Leo with a stuffed animal. Just as Leo was thinking that maybe no one would mention it, Mikey spoke up.
"Leo has a teddy bear?"
Immediately, the moment of quietness was shattered as his three younger brothers and friend burst into laughter.
"Guys, really-" Leo started to say, before he was nearly blown over by another gale of hysterical howls.
"I've gotta say," Raphael gasped, his eyes watering from mirth, "I've never been this happy!"
"I know," Mikey wheezed from the ground, holding his side as he doubled over, "This is better than the hooker!"
Raphael didn't even slap Mikey, since he was too preoccupied with trying to catch his breath.
"I hate to break it to you" Leo said, once he was sure his brothers weren't going to pass out from lack of air, "but I never had a stuffed bear."
"Yes, you did, Leo," Don teased, "Remember Mr. Snuggleworth?"
Mikey, who had finally started to calm down, fell over in another bout of ecstasy.
"Now I've never been this happy," Raphael roared with laughter.
"Oh my God," Mikey panted, his voice raspy, "I think I just peed myself."
"You also let something else out," Don said, his brow crinkling as he waved his hand, trying to drive out Mikey's involuntary release of excitement.
"Can we just watch this?" Leo asked, trying not to breath.
"Yeah," Mikey said, "After we finish this, Master Splinter can tell us all about Mr. Snuggleworth!"
Leo's eyes widened. "No-" he started, but Don had already clicked the play button again.
Don, who was resting facedown, quickly sat up as an alarm blared throughout the lair. "The perimeter alarm!" He exclaimed. He glanced at a red, flashing light on the blueprint of the lair on his laptop. "It's the sub tunnel."
"Looks like we caught ourselves a monster," Raphael said, appearing in the doorway.
"Gear up, bros!" Leo ordered, sticking his head in the room.
"Yeah, you gotta protect your teddy," Mikey grinned. If looks could kill, Mikey would be reduced to a smoldering pile of ash on the ground.
The three brothers quickly put on array of fancy armor and hi-tech weaponry.
"Cool, we're like the Ghostbusters!" Mikey said excitedly, "Except they're monsters, not ghosts. So we would be like the Monsterbusters!"
"Who wants to bet Mikey's caught in the trap," Raphael said, his face still slightly red.
"This way," Don said, as they ran down the tunnel, "The monster's right around this... corner?" The last part of his statement trailed off into a confounded question as he, Leo, and Raphael stared in bewilderment at the sight in front of them.
"Looks like you were right, Raph," Don said.
A large belch pierced the air and Mikey is revealed to be hanging haphazardly upside down, holding a piece of pizza. "Michelangelo?" Leo asked in a confused tone.
"Umm...uh...hi, guys," Mikey said casually, "I-" Mikey paused to release another burp. "I kept thinking about the leftover pizza sitting out here as bait, and...uh...I got hungry.
"Only you, Mikey," Leo rolled his eyes.
"I wonder if it has sausage, and peppers, and olives, and...!" Mikey rambled aimlessly, his mouth watering from just thinking about the cheesy goodness. Don silenced Mikey with an elbow in his side, before Raphael could smack him.
The three turtles exchanged looks of annoyance, before Raphael groaned in disgust and stalked off, Leo flapping his hand exasperatedly at Mikey as he followed his brothers.
"Guys?" Mikey called out, helplessly watching his brothers disappear around the corner,
"Hey, guys!"
"So," Becca said offhandedly, "Do you guys still wanna tease me or try to find Mr. Snuggleworth?"
"Rebecca," Leo frowned, "I don't think Don, Mikey and Raph want to-" He stopped as he realized he was the only one left in the room. "I hate my life," he muttered as he banged his head against the keyboard.
