Hello! I went to a 5sos concert yesterday!!! Who else went? I was gross and Sweatin but I saw my baby's so I'm happy. They are so freaking good live!!!!!
(A/n this is sorta a trigger warning for the next couple of chapters, Hope is going through a lot of shit rn so please don't let it get to you!<3 not that I don't care about what you do to yourself it's just I don't have time to warn you for every paragraph! But please keep this warning mind for the parts that include those types of things. Have a wonderful day!)Hopes pov
I help Luke book the flight, it left in two days. I couldn't get my blades out of my head since I ran out in the rain I acted like I was fine. I laughed and didn't argue with the compliments Luke constantly gave me. He was just trying to make me feel better.
We are all watching some movie Molly picked out. It was called Homeward Bound.
I was kinda sad, I'm a softie for animals. I've always wanted one secretly.
Cal had one when we were younger, his name was Lenny. Strange name for a Pit bull Terrier.
"Hey Hope, can I talk to you?" Calum whispers next to me.
"Yeah, what's up?" I ask.
"Alone?"
"Um alright."
We walk to the hallway, he looks really nervous. Please don't be about me.
"What's up?" I say softly.
"Um, when I drove Tristan home yesterday I asked her on a date." He whispers, his tone was raspy.
"What did she say?" I ask. He lowers his head and sniffs.
"She said she used to date the YouTuber Tyler Right, he broke her heart and she said she couldn't date another famous guy," he sighs. A few tears escape his dark brown eyes.
"I know you, Cal, you could make any girl melt, take it slow. Make her fall for you." I tell him. I hug him and he goes to his room.
I sit next to Luke.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
"Girl issues, I'll explain later. Let's finish this movie." I whisper.
~~two days later, (the day they are leaving for Florida!)~~
Every little thing would set me off, I would sneak to the bathroom and cry. I've missed my blades more and more. I was tempted to break my razor open, I'm only allowed to have the kind where you can't pop out the blades.
A/n (idek bare with me here)I would act fine around everyone so that I didn't have to drown in their pity. They moved on so quickly. I still have nightmares. I have controlled crying in front if Luke, it brakes him down.
Right now it's five in the morning, our flight for North America leaves at eight. I'm laying next to Luke who's quietly snoring. He rolled over in his sleep so his arms weren't locked around my waist.
I'm currently holding back sobs, I woke up softly gasping. I'm on the verge of needing comfort. I have been pushing everyone away. It's selfish to soak in my own misery when all my friends want to do is help.
I need to let him know I'm not okay, that I need help. I won't get better if I don't.
Luke's pov
I wake up to Hopes' voice.
"L-Luke? P-Please get up." She stutters. I sit up and look at her.
She was a mess, she started crying when we made eye contact.
"What's wrong?" I whisper. I pull her close.
She trembles and shakes, I wrap my arms around her torso.
"I'm not okay Luke. I've been acting, basically lying. I need help. I need your help." She says after calming down. Is she been acting? How could I have been so stupid?
"I'm here for you babe. You're not leaving my fucking sight for this whole two weeks, okay?" I ask, wow that sounded harsh.
"T-That's okay," she whispers.
I wipe a stray tear from her cheek, she smiles. This time, I'm for sure that it's real.
"Want me to make your oatmeal?" She asks after we finish getting dressed.
"I'll help you." I offer. We make our oatmeal. She grabs a third bowl and hands it to a dead looking Michael.
He mumbles,"thanks,"
"How are you holding up Mike?" I ask to break the uncomfortable silence.
"I'm pretty much over it. I think I'll enjoy being single for now." He says.
"Good morning!" Molly chirps. Damn, she came out of nowhere.
"Morning Molls, you look good," Hope smiles.
"Awh! Thank you to Hope. I guess we won't look homeless at the airport!" She beams.
"Most of us won't," I say looking at Ashton.
"Hey! I am the same thing as you!" He scoffs.
"I would say I look the hottest," Calum says as he walks into the room.
"Absolutely!" Molly says,"not."
He sticks his tongue out and swipes Hopes bowl.
"I'm not done with that," she growls.
"I'm too lazy to make my own," he wines.
"Whatever Cal," she sighs and grabs an apple.
"That was extremely rude!" Molly hisses and flicks Calum in the head. He just shrugs. We all finish what we can before Calum steals it.
Hope and I go back to grab our suitcases.
We shared a backpack for on the plane. I just put my phone charger and ear buds in there. Hope puts her charger and book in there.
I grab my wallet and Hope's hand and make my way to the door.
We pile into a cab, so we didn't have to make someone drive Hopes car back.
"It really hot out here!" Ashton says.
"No, that's just me!" Calum sneers. Molly giggles and Hope and I roll our eyes.
We through the tunnel into the plane, it's been 3 months since we have walked through one of these. When we did thousands of fans wait for us, they were all screaming and waving. It was a goodbye for now. 5sos was taking a break. The slfl tour was a huge success, and being able to go to most of the states was great too.
"The last tour was one of my favorites," Hope says as we take our seats.
"Same. Next year I want to hit the places we haven't been before, and visit back to North America again," I tell her.
"Yeah, that would be fun," She mutters as she takes the window seat. I scroll through twitter and talk with Michael behind me. It started getting dark after awhile. I look at Hope who's contently reading.
"How are you doing?" I ask.
"Alright mate," she says in her Australian accent.
"Nice accent mate," I tease.
"Well sorry for trying to fit in!" She scoffs and crosses her arms, she turns so she's facing away from me.
"Awh I'm sorry mate! I love you," I sing, I poke her arm.
"Don't touch me Hemmings! I dont want your germs," she hisses.
"But kissing you involves skin contact," I whine.
She just shrugs. I stick out my bottom lip. She struggles to hold a straight face, her lips pull into a smile.
"Oh fine, I guess you are allowed t..." I cut her off and kiss her. I smirk into the kiss.
She looked a bit taken back.
"Get a room!" Ashton shouts from across the isle.
My face heats up, but I ignore him.
I hand Hope an earbud and we listen to music for an hour until she falls asleep on my shoulder.
I feel as if sleeping is not an option right now, I need to be able to calm Hope down right away.
She begins to stir, a small gasp escapes her lips.
"Hope?" I shake her.
"What!?" She shouts, my hand quickly covers her mouth. It was dark and I could barely see her face, but I could feel her tears slides across my hand.
"It's okay, I'm right here," I whisper removing my hand from her face and I cup her chin.
"I-I'm s-sorry, I will be o-okay," she stutters.
"It's fine babe, go back to sleep. I won't leave you, here drink some water." I hand her the bottle from the cup holder.
She falls asleep on my shoulder and I rest my head on hers. I cover her up with my flannel. I close my eyes and let sleep take over.
That wasn't a good ending, a little repetive. I'm sorry! I promise it will get better. I'll let you know the drama is going to die down, for now. ;)
Xxkisumomo