Road Mom

blehh your mom

I just layed in the car crying into a pillow. Laying right in the middle . . . where dirty hippies could of had an orgy of 'love' I gaged and jumped out of the car trying to wipe off the dirty hippy of me. Dont get me wrong I love hippies as much as the next person, but when they had most likely had sex where you were laying when your trying to have a emotional moment. They suck.

A man walked pass me. I stopped him, "Excuse me do you know what time it is?"

"Yeah its seven." He told me.

"Thanks mister!"

I hopped in the car and started it . . . and started it . . . and started it again.

"Flipping Geese!" I yelled out in agony.

Than I see a drop dead hottie greaser coming this way. I looked in the mirror looking looking presentable. I jumped out of the car and popped te hood up. Mumbling profanities. Hoping he'll stop and see me. Trust me if you saw this boy mmmhmmm. Damn. Okay alittle head of your self foxy.

"Car troubles?" Greaser boy asked me.

"Yeah, and I really need to go to my new job!" I answered dumb and blonde. I know greasers, used to date em, they like feeling like top dog. So I stupid right now.

"Here maybe I could help you." He went over to the car, and looked at it.

"Thank you so much!"

"Here you go." He moved wires around and wa la it was fixed I guess.

I went in the front seat and started it, it worked!

"Would you wanna sell the car?" Hottie asked me.

"Actually I have no use for it after I get to my job. So yeah I guess. How much you have on ya?"

"Hundred bucks I could drive you to your job if you want me too. I just need to get away, you know?"

"Know exactly what you mean, hop in the driver seat." He got in quickly and came in to the driver seat.

We just sat there talking while he was driving. Turns out he has an acholic dad too. Than we finally reach my destination. The boys were standing by the tour bus. Leaning on it. I think they were waiting for me.

"Thanks Derek! Take good care of the van!" I leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Got my junk out the back and headed to my new job.

"Boyfriend?" Jimmy asked me. Ibwas surprised and a little concerned. Why does he care?

"Maybe, maybe not." I answered with no care in the world.

"Its an yes or no question."

"Calm down gestapo, I just sold him my van."

"Oh." We were just standing there akwardly.

"So . . . Were gonna go in the bus?"

"Yeah" Bonzo answered.

We went it it was shag carpets chairs bathroom mini kitchen. I could deal with it.

I just sat down in a seat. The bus started and we started moving. What the fuck am I suppose to do?

"Nat we want to know about you." Robert said.

"What do you want to know?" I answered.

"Uh how did your parents meet?" He asked. That was atually a good story.

" Well I forgot what year it was but my dad and mom grew up in a small town they hated eachother to death, after high school they both went their seperate ways, so happens they both went to england, my mom had beatlemania. Crazy about them, crying for george Harrison and everything. My dad was a police officer there holding all the beatle freaks. My mom being clumsy knocked her self out fell or something. My dad knew who she was, took her to the hospital. She was knocked out for three days, he stayed with her the whole three days. After that the rest is history!"

"That is an kick ass story!" Jimmy exclaimed.

"I know right like a fairytale!"

"So whatelse?" I asked.

"Uhh your love life! How is it?" Rob asked

"Love life love life. Well its not a real good story, my first kiss Ned Dunken." They started laughing their asses off.

"What!? Its an good name!" I playfully hit all of them.

"For an accountant!!" Bonzo added

"Okay keep going." John said all of them still laughing.

"and then I'm done" I added.

"What do you mean done? What about your first time? First makeout? First crush?" Robert asked.

"Done! First time never had it! First makeout never had it! First crush Billy Fergeson."

The boys looked at me like I murdered a box of kittens.

Jimmy spoke in whispers "You neva . . . like done it'? Like done it?" He told me like I was a serial killer ready to charge.

"No I haven't I havent had time for boyfriends because I work so much" Still looked at me in amazement.

John touched me on my arm "Your the purest person I've ever touched." Said like I was a god.

"I wanna touch her!" Bonzo whined

"Go ahead then!" I yelled. They all smiled. One by one they all touched my arm like creepers. The bus stopped.

"Were here? Only been talking for like thirty minutes."

"Well we were only going to your sister city" Rob aswnered.

"Oh"

We got out to an nice hotel.

"Miss the manager wanted me to give this to you, for all the hotel stuff" the bus diver told me.

"Oh thanks!"

"Here guys stay in the lobby while I get the stuff" I told the guys.

I walked into the hotel check in.

"Hello. " an older man told me.

"Hi I'm here to check in, here are all my information."I handed him the papers.

Typed up a couple of things.

"Here you go! Have a good stay!" I waved goodbye, took the kids and waited in the elevator.

"So when's your next concert?" I asked

"Tonight. You should come, well you have to come." Robert told me.

"Okay" We got to the floor we were on. I handed their room keys.

"Wait! Who do I stay with?!"

I fell all of the guys were deciding who do I stay with.

"Stop!" I yelled. "I'm gonna stay with Rob and john, and the next day I'll stay with Jimmy and Bonzo."

I was walking twords the room with john. Pretty nice room two beds tv little kitchen. I jumped on the couch, turned on the tv. Six million dollar man was on. I watched it for like twenty minutes, dumb episode.

"Guys I'm gonna take an shower!" I yelled. I got 'okays' in response.

I took my 'holy' body and started to strip down. Hopped in the shower. Nice relaxing. Nice. Then I hear the door creaking open.

"Wha'd ya want?" I asked covering my boobs.

"I really need to go to the bathroom!" Bonzo said.

"Go. And hurry"

Instead of standing up he sat down. Great!

"Your gonna drop a bomb?" I told him.

"Like in viatnom!"

"Great now its gonna smell like steamy shit. Why didn't you go in your bathroom"

"Jimmy in there curling his hair and wouldn't let me in."

"Jim curls his hair?" I asked

"Yup"

"Oh."

"You wear a bra?" He asked

"Yeah? Creeper"

"Oh no because girls don't wear em much often, thats why I asked. "

The door creaked again.