Is this my end?

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Having no one in your life eats me from the inside everyday. Cutting has become a routine that it doesnt statisfy me unless it hits deep into my veins. Im only glad its winter so i can hide it with wearing layers . My mom is clueless she only sees herself she doesnt even care that she has a daughter. My ex friends bully me everyday my ex boyfriend that once loved me laughs at my scars and calls me emo. I smoke ciggarette by ciggarette wishing it would kill me. My once A+  average is now gone , so now im left with thinking who do i have to live for ,no one and nothing . I pay a visit to my only friend everyday thinking that if i let myself loose to it ill finally have happiness and serenity but my friend pushes me back everyday and everyday i will still visit the cliff near my house and dream that one day it will leave me be and not push me back..

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