One in a Million

Chapter 21

Don't do it.

Think of Tho--

You deserve to die.

Do it.

Think of Colt--

Stop.

You need to die.

Think of Jo--

You're worthless.

You're ugly.

Think of Anth--

You're stupid.

Thomas was using you the whole time.

Think of Er--

Thomas hates you.

He never cared.

He only kept you around because he pitied you.

STOP. STOP THINKING. YOU ARE CARED FOR. YOU DESERVE LI--

I kicked the stool.

My air supply was closing off. Every breath got shorter and harder.

My eyes closed, and then I was dreaming.

I was breathing fast and my heart was racing.

"Is everything okay?" Thomas mumbled. Thomas's arm was wrapped around me, and he was sleeping. I woke him up.

Damn, I woke him up. I keep bothering everybody!!

"Bad dream. I'm sorry for waking you."

"Want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Was it about yesterday?"

"Yes."

"It's okay. It's all over. Everything's okay. I'm here," Thomas said and pulled me closer to him.

"I'm sorry I did that to you," I said to him, but I think he was already asleep.

After that I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to go back to sleep where I could live through that again.

I let out a shaky breath. What the hell have I done with my life?

Screwed it up that's for sure.

Thomas's arm finally loosened around me, indicating he was, in fact, asleep. I rolled onto my back and put my hands around my head, letting my mind wander.

I don't know how long it had been, thinking about everything, but I had either fallen asleep without knowing, or I had been up all night thinking. Soon, the light began to peak through the blinds and I was still laying in the same position.

One of the things I had been thinking about was Recovery. Since what happened yesterday I don't think I could ever hurt Thomas like that again. I mean, for gods sake, he has depression like me. He would kill himself on the spot. Just like I would.

Thomas jolted awake, and then relaxed his head back on the pillow he was sleeping on.

"Hey," I said. Seriously?! That's all you can say?! Hey?! God what an idiot.

"Hi."

"Sleep well?"

"No. Did you?"

"I don't even think I slept."

"I think we should get ready for the day."

"Okay."

And with that, he got up and left my room.

<~>

That's a wrap!

Okay. I know this sucks. I know it's like total crap. But here is another chapter. I might not even update again because I'm pretty sure no one even cares.

Talk to you next time, maybe.

✌️