The Book Of Beautiful Souls

Ghostdreamerxoxo

The Story of @Ghostdreamerxoxo

Ever since I was born, I wasn't that lucky. I had a father who physically and mentally abused me. It was terrible. I was slapped as a year old child. I was yelled at constantly. The worst part was that my mom was abused constantly. She was yelled at, and physically abused by him.

He worked in the army and luckily left us alone for quite some time, but the good ended immediately. My mother was very poor and the army couldn't pay all of our expenses, so, I had to go live with my grandfather. I was about 3 years old at this point. Then, when I was around 5, my mother divorced my father because he was cheating on her with a Mexican lady.

She wasn't that bad, but definitely not my mother. When I lived with my mom, I went to this day care at a woman's house. She was nice but the other kids weren't. I was beaten constantly with toys. I was also molested by a thirteen year old. 

When I was six, my mom and I moved around a lot, because she was in and out of relationships and was desperate. I never had any friends and I never really liked to speak with anyone, so I was pretty much alone. After that, I was seven. This is the town I live in now and I am 13. So, when I was seven, We moved in with my grandmother, who by the way, is terribly mean to her. So we lived at my grandparent's house with my two cousins, and my grandparents. One time, while living there, I remember my aunt and my mother got into a fight.

It. Was. Terrible.

My aunt was biting, punching, and threatening my mother, while my cousin was on my mom's back. I didn't know what to do, being the youngest, so I just stood there in shock. It was terrible to watch.. My mom and I got out of the house and went to her boyfriend house. More about him later.

I didn't like him because I didn't like anyone who tried to get close to my mother, you have to remember all the crap that my mom and I went through together.

So, when I was 7, 8, and 9, I went to this one school, I was a terrible child. I bullied kids and everyone was afraid of me, I really am not proud of myself for that. That is when I went to a new school and turned ten.

I fell in love. I had liked this guy for three years. I really liked him.... until he shattered my heart. This is when I began to think too much and realize how shitty my life was. I began secluding myself once more, but not as bad as I do right now.

Its like I am trying to swim and not drown, but I feel as if I have already drowned. It is so hard for me to even laugh, the things I used to smile about... I can't be happy about anymore, I cant do the things I used to love anymore, now I try to be myself but I like girls and I am a female. I can't be myself people look at me weird and I am definitely not accepted in my society.

I have very few friends, that is why when I read your chapter I felt that this was my chance to get everything out, and i appreciate you being here for me.

Though, my Mom and her last boyfriend got married, I call him my father and I truly love him now.

❇❇❇

ThePsychoMadHatter: We are truly sorry for hearing what you've been through and we are here for you no matter what! We won't judge you because you like girls (believe that's honestly fucking awesome! Be proud.)

As a girl that is bisexual, I understand your pain. If some bitchass hoe comes to you and says to stay away from her, get into full salty mode and say, “Well, I do have my standards.” (GO ALL DYLAN ON HIM! *nudges The Tattooed Bad Boy readers*)

Shush, it's what I did.

Anyway, back to the point, we will always be here for you no matter what, and I do hope that you make new friends on here, because we really do realize your value.

❤ Stay Strong! ❤