It was both Harry's And Noel's third glass of champagne. It seemed as if they were challenging who could get drunk first and find an excuse to bail on the other.
'How lovely, just like old times,' Noel thought to herself as she took another drink.
Silence merely ensued further as time passed and the number of people in the flat increased. Noel, who was surprisingly holding her breath, released the built up carbon dioxide and decided to speak up. The only thing was, Harry decided to do the same.
Harry's 'So, how have you been?' directly collided with Noel's simple 'How's life?' Both of them gave out slight laughter because of it, forgetting for a mere second that there was still tension in the air.
"So," Harry started, "How have you been? How was the Philippines?" When he asked her, he genuinely cared and pushed the awkwardness away. He wanted to know how the two years without appearing in front of him felt like. He just assumed that it felt great to have him out of her life, unfortunately.
"It was actually really good. I got to see more family member's, so it had a homely feel to it." Noel mentally cringed because she didn't leave it as open-ended as she wanted to in order for the conversation to keep on rolling.
Harry merely smiled and nodded like the good chap he is. "That seems really wonderful, actually. It seemed nice to get away from a place that you've been confined in for your entire life."
Noel nodded back, scattering her brain for possible answers or replies that she could choose. "Yeah, it felt incredibly nice. But I started missing home here, you know? I started missing everyone like you and Gem and my parents and Adielle." She had to pinch herself from running around in hysterics over the fact that she just old Harry she missed him.
Harry finished the rest of his champagne and gently set the glass down on the coffee table next to them. Noel's heart felt like it wanted to burst at even his littlest movements, such as him fiddling with his fingers while someone was talking or when he'd fiddle with the rings on his fingers. "Well, I missed you too. It was odd not having you barge in the door for so long."
She brightly smiled and used her mechanism of trying to hide her blushing cheeks behind her hair. "Yeah..."
Silence followed once again, and both Harry and Noel didn't even want to move, in fear that something would happen. It wasn't until Harry cleared his throat and gained Noel's attention, which was already starting to fade away. "Hey, uh, I know that we just started taking baby steps to make things better between us and that what I'm about to say may possibly make it awkward again. But I think you deserve a genuine apology from me instead of the one I gave you on the phone after you just left Holmes Chapel while still with a massive hangover."
Noel was surprised. She was so surprised that she felt her heart rate increasing. To calm herself down, she merely fiddled with her fingers in a manner that soothed her and didn't make her nervous state even more obvious.
"I know that I have no right to give you any bullshit excuses in hopes that you'll understand my side of the story and that it may potentially fix what I seriously fucked up. But what I will say is that you did not deserve to be hurt in any way, especially the way I hurt you, and I am absolutely incredibly sorry.
"I'm sorry that I kept pressuring you to have sex with me. I was so screwed up then about it, like, fuck man. I was so impatient and selfish that I didn't even really worry what you may be feeling when I asked you those things, or if you were feeling anything at all. But my point is, life just settled down when you were gone."
Noel gave him an annoyed look. "And I'm guessing that was a good thing?"
Harry waved his hands at that. "No. Oh goodness, no. But having my life settling down wasn't what I wanted, at least not yet. Life just always went up and down and side to side when it was you. And you know what? It was so much fun. So having you leave and my life starting to quiet down just made me hollow, in a way."
He breathed in and gave Noel that genuine, crooked smile that he used to always charm her with. And it was working. "I just missed you so damn much, Noe."
• • •
Author's Note - December 26, 2016
no more holidays anymore :(
(and this is unedited as well; i'm so so sorry it's just that i'm short on time now ugh)
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