I just don't know...

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It's weird..

I can never bring myself to be...proud of myself.

For example I am...well was, 45 days clean of self harming.

Well I don't feel proud like its a good thing. 

I don't know why. 

I just feel kinda sad about that. But at the same time I'm happy and surprised I made it this long.

I just don't know.

Like I got Mike and Ike's and those are my favoritestest candy ever and I wasn't even that excited. 

So I don't know.

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