From Pain

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"Well, is there something you needed Tae?" HoSeok mumbled, slightly frustrated with the situation and himself as he stared at the gaping boy, his mouth opening and closing as he struggled to push the words through. "Are you okay?" HoSeok reached out, resting his warm palm hesitantly against Taehyung's forehead. The younger boy brushed it off, jerking away from HoSeok's heated touch as his cheeks grew red from the small gesture.

    "Hyung," He trailed off, watching as HoSeok leaned leisurely against the door jamb, raising an eyebrow. Almost as if his previously hostility meant nothing. HoSeok wanted to say something but he held back, waiting for him to say what he wanted to. No, needed to.

    Something told him that it would change his life in ways he could only imagined.

HoSeok's heart thundered in his chest, forcing him to take deep shallow breaths in attempts to regain his stature.

    "Hyung, I wanted to say something, something that's been hurting me for a while." Taehyung licked, twisting his long fingers together as the butterflies flittered away in his hollow stomach. As cool as the boy appeared, his mind was racing a million miles an hour.

Though in his mind he's accomplished the goal of confessing his love, of bearing his heart to the one who he prayed would accept him. His body refused to.

The moths held him back, they crawled their way to his throat and brought on the terror of rejection, pain and hurting. He could already feel the thorns ripping his fragile lungs apart, a rose blooming beautifully in all its glory from his pain. He wrapped his long arms around himself as tears pricked the corner of his large eyes.

Please

He begged for mercy.

  Reaching out, HoSeok laced his slender fingers with Taehyung longer one, sensing the distress clouding his mind and body as he slowly dragged him inside the comfort of his house, closing the big yellow door and dragging him up the stairs to his dark and heady room.

    "Taehyung," HoSeok began, gently pushing the boy down to comfortably sit on his rumpled bed, kicking at the string of clothes lining his bedroom floor in embarrassment. "I'm here for you, whatever you want to say just know that I will never judge you." He started, kneeling down before the boy who had his head hung low. Gently, HoSeok rubbed Taehyung knees in a reassuring gesture, coaxing him to relax as best he could.

   No matter how much he comforted the younger boy, his heart was threatening to burst in his chest, but he forced his jittery limbs to remain in control. Being this close to the boy he's seen as a god since the very first they met took his breath away. His mind foggy with devotion and complete and utter fondness.

   If he could, he would listen to the singing blood in his veins and lean over, capturing his lovers full lips between his thinner one. He was ready to have a taste of him, he could no longer hide it.

HoSeok could no longer wait.

The air was still and hot between the two boys. Arousals heady and strong as fingers tickled exposed skin and hearts beat loudly throughout the small cramped and dark room.

Taehyung's wondered if his HoSeokie could hear his cry for help, he was burning up on the inside, burning with his love and adoration for the older male even if his body fought so strongly against his heart's crying confessions.

"Hyung, I love you." His voice was so sudden, so soft and fragile, almost as if the brittle air between the two chipped away at the words as they forcefully left his gritting teeth. A tear slid down Taehyung's heated cheek as HoSeok gasped, eyes wide and indignation roaring like a beast. He puffed out a breath of disbelief, tear pricking his round eyes as the words slipped past his lips.

    "Yo-you what?" HoSeok stammered, voice breaking as the shock settled in, chilling his bones as he stared up at the boy. Not once did Taehyung lift his head to meet his lovers eyes. Pain seeping from his shallow breaths as he waited for a reply he knew would come. A reply that would shatter his erratically beating heart.

   How could someone as pure as Taehyung love me? A lowly boy with so much bottled up self hatred and pain? I am weak. I hurt. I am no good for you! I'm dark and he's light, so pure and guilt free. How could he fall for me?

All these questions flittered through HoSeok's busy mind. Doubt twisting the possibilities into burning questions.

   "No-no you do-don't!" He all but shouted! He was playing a game, he didn't feel for him the way he truly felt. Taehyung didn't feel the gut wrenching pain that HoSeok did, he couldn't have. Does he really love him? Love me? How could he?!

   "Yes, yes I do! I've loved you for years! I've watched you smile, struggle, cry!" He took a deep breath, finally raising his head to stare deeply into the boy's eyes. "I've seen it all. Begging to be there with you, for you!" Taehyung's voice was even softer though his words spoke volumes, each word so loud it stung HoSeok hardly beating heart.

"No-" HoSeok began but was quickly quieted but Taehyung's voice growing with the force of a thousand lovers, a thousand broken hearts.

"Yes! Yes I have but you've always failed to realise that I was right by your side the entire time!" He sobbed, voice growing in earth shaking octaves. "If you don't believe me, here!" Reaching into his pocket, Taehyung quickly ripped the small orange and blue coloured envelope out, the dog ears deepening as he nearly but ripped the covering off and handed it to the one who was now breaking his heart.

This was no diseases of the mind, this pain truly existed for he felt not the pain he's been holding onto for years now. Watching his smile transform into sadness.

"What's this?" HoSeok asked dubiously, wrapping his thin fingers around the ripped flaps of the envelope that Taehyung flung towards him, plucking out an array of letters from the battered packaging.

"This is my heart, please don't break it." With that, Taehyung stood up and wiped his eyes with his long sleeves, pulling his trembling bottom lip between his teeth before giving the older boy one last look of earnest.

   Please remove me from this pain.

Colours|| k.th + j. hs  [Completed]Where stories live. Discover now