Will You Be My Daddy? ~Joker Fanfiction~

Three

Joker would have never expected what he found when he came to check on Madeline some time later.

First off, Johnny wasn't standing guard in front of her door, which might have sent him into a fit of rage and aggression had J not considered that he was probably with the girl or off getting something for her. You have to calm down and think before you go off on a murderous rampage.

Second, there were giggles coming from the bedroom, muffled by the door. That would not have been so strange had they belonged to a certain little girl, but no, these were most certainly male giggles emanating from the bedroom.

Joker's eyes narrowed in suspicion, and not a little confusion at the situation, his nonexistent eyebrows furrowing as he frowned. On edge from Maddie's 'welcoming' the day before, he busted the door open—though it wasn't locked—to reveal one of the most hilarious scenes he thought he'd ever encountered.

Somehow—J didn't really care to know —Madeline had roped his best goon along with two others into sitting in tiny pink plastic chairs around a little pink table covered by a plastic tea set and real snack cakes as Maddie served them invisible tea from the teapot. That wasn't it though, oh no. The goons were also all donned in sparkly tiaras and boas with nails painted pink or purple, fake sipping from empty tea cups like it was tea time with the Queen at a drag club. The best part had to be that the goons—even Frost—looked really into the little tea party, laughing and playing with Maddie without a care in the world.

That all ended, of course, the moment the door was kicked open. The goons all froze in shock, looking like kids with their hand caught in the cookie jar. Maddie, too, stopped what she was doing, pausing mid-pour.

"Boss," Johnny coughed, clearing his throat as he stood up quickly from his seat, causing it to tip back and fall with a clatter. All of the goons looked increasingly terrified; even Johnny appeared on edge.

That is until Joker could no longer contain his laughter and began to hysterically cackle at what he had walked into. He fell to the floor, wheezing for breath as he howled with laughter at the hilarity of the situation. Soon enough Maddie's giggling could also be heard while the goons nervously sat and fidgeted. J opened his eyes—which had begun to tear up at the strength of his laughs—only to see Mad's upside down face leaning over his, her broad smile nearly splitting her face. There was a twinkle in her eye, and that's when Joker knew that he was really and truly fucked.

"Daddy! I knew you'd come! Andy and Tommy and Johnny said you wouldn't but you did! Come on! I've got a seat ready for you and I saved the best crown and boa for you, too!" She chattered excitedly, holding up a sparkly purple boa and tiara.

Joker sat up quickly, barely avoiding knocking heads with the girl. Fuck. How do I get out of this? Think fast, J, or you're screwed.

"While that's very sweet of you princess," J said with fake seriousness, "I actually came here to tell you that it's time for dinner and then bed."

Excellent move. You pulled the Dad card on her.

Shut up. No one was talking to you. Joker frowned, distracted, and then forced himself back to the present, where Madeline was pouting, but thankfully not crying. Yet.

"But Daddy," she whined.

Joker's face darkened threateningly, the goons in the room became closer to pissing themselves than before, and Johnny felt bad about the rage that was soon to be unleashed upon the girl.

"Don't you start this shit with me, missy. I'm the one in charge here. Me, not you. And when I say no, I fucking mean no! Do I make myself clear?" Joker demanded harshly.