Bucky Barnes; Legendary Shitposter

Chapter 3: The Weekend Begins...

"DAMNIT!" Came a scream from the bathroom. The Avengers had been called to the Helicarrier to do a debrief, and Bucky was getting ready.

"Bucky, is something wrong?" Steve burst into the room, the top section of his costume still unzipped, hanging around his waist, brandishing his shield infront of his bare chest. He looked very fierce, until Bucky turned toward him with the most exasperated half-lidded glare ever.

Literally half his face was a mask of eyeliner.

Steve tried to remain all fierce-looking for a second, but broke down within seconds.

"FUCK OFF STEVE!" Shouted Bucky, his clearly painstakingly straightened hair waving around his face.

Natasha peeked inside, wavy red hair falling in messy curls around her face. "Bucky, are you done with my-" She cut off upon seeing his face and a shirtless, laughing Steve. "...Do you need a hand with the pencil?" She asked.

"God, yes, please." Bucky rolled his eyes. "Steve, get your shirtless ass out of this bathroom."

When Steve didn't move, Bucky chased him out, smacking him with a rolled-up magazine.

"Please." He handed her the eyeliner pencil.

"...This is the messiest raccoon eyeliner job I have ever seen." She quirked an eyebrow. "Haven't you done this like, constantly over the last half-century?"

Bucky looked down. "...No." His voice was quiet and guilty.

"...are you telling me," Natasha looked at him coolly. "that HYDRA had a stylist?"

"...yes..." He mumbled.

The corner of her mouth quirked. "Well, now that you're not HYDRA, we'll need to teach you how to do that by yourself. C'mere." She waved him over to the mirror.

Some three minutes later, Bucky had perfect raccoon eyeliner, and somehow Natasha didn't make him look like he was dying, rather, he now looked very fierce.

"Thanks Nat."

"Don't destoy my pencil." She smiled at him kindly, before heading out for the Quinjet.

#^v^v^v^v^v#

"'Every time I put on eye makeup it gets bigger. My whole face is eyeliner now.'" Clint laughed as Tony landed the plane on the Helicarrier's station for it.

"Ok, that's it, I need to know who keeps posting this stuff." Tony snickered, smirking quietly.

The plane touched down quietly, a few assistants running in to tie down the sleek jet.

The Avengers unloaded, heading inside to the meeting room. Assembling around the table, they awaited the arrival of Fury.

When the director walked in with a confident strut, four folders under his arm, everyone blinked slightly.

"Four cases?" Wondered Tony, leaning to Cap. "Don't we only have two?"

Steve gave a small shrug, making a noncommittal noise.

"Two in progress." Natasha nodded. "Looks like we have some extra."

Fury slapped down the folders, glaring around the table. "Agent Maximoff, still in Solkovia with agents Lance and Jocov." He tossed the first file on the table. Immediately, Clint snatched it up.

"How're they doing in there, sir?" He questioned politely, tilting his head.

"Just fine so far, Agent. Just fine." The director nodded at Clint. Pleased, the archer sat back, returning the file to the table. "Agent Lomen is in Manhattan," Fury placed the second 'in progress' file on the table. "investigating the other half of this."