My Straight Best Friend

Chapter 15: I know who I am

Mia P.O.V

It's been a while since I saw Sarah. It was probably for the best. At least we still talked over the phone. I was still there for her whenever she needed me. This past month had been hard for both of us. She constantly texted me whenever she needed someone to talk to, frankly, I was glad she did.

Week 1 without Sarah text messages:

Sarah: Hey, I was just wondering if you have any advice towards the social pressure when you're in the closet.
Mia: Try not to think about it. Dont worry about what other people think, just think about what's best for you.
Sarah: Thanks.

Week 2 text messages:

Sarah: I can't do this, everything is too much. What if I can't figure myself out? What if I say the wrong thing and end up being completely different? I don't want to upset anyone. Let alone confuse myself... Help.
Mia: Calm down, don't worry about any of that. You'll figure yourself out in time. You're the smartest most beautiful girl I know, you got this. Nobody is going to be upset with you because we all love you for who you are. As long as you take your time everything will be ok.
Sarah: Promise?
Mia: I promise. I'm here for you ok?
Sarah: Ok thanks Mia.
Mia: You welcome, text me if you need anything.

Week 3:

Sarah: What if I get hurt?
Mia: Who's going to hurt you?
Sarah: There's bad people out there. Somebody could just hate me. Maybe an old coworker, or an old room mate from college, or a crazy family member.
Mia: Nobody hates you. You're the sweetest person I know Sarah. Sure you might be forward, but that's what people love about you. Nobody hates you, trust me. You're not going to get hurt. And if somebody tries to hurt you, I have your back.
Sarah: If you have my back, who's got my front? ;)
Mia: Nice to know you can still joke around.
Sarah: Seriously, I want to know.
Mia: I've got both.
Sarah: Yeah you do.
Mia: What's that supposed to mean?
Sarah: Oh um, nothing. I was just playing around.
Mia: Well either way you're safe with me Sarah.
Sarah: Thanks Mia. I know I can always count on you.

Week 4:

Sarah: I don't want to come out my room ever.
Mia: You have to sometime.
Sarah: No. I don't want to.
Mia: You're acting like a child. What's wrong?
Sarah: ...
Mia: What is it?
Sarah: What if my parents find out? Or my brother?
Mia: They won't find out until you're ready to tell them.
Sarah: How do you know? Someone could push me out of the closet.
Mia: The people you tell will know not to tell anyone unless you want them to.
Sarah: Ok but there could still be some jerk who tells them.
Mia: There won't be. But if there is, your parents and brother are very loving, they'll accept you either way.
Sarah: Maybe my parents, but what if my brother hates it?
Mia: He won't.
Sarah: How do you know?
Mia: He's friends with me Sarah, remember?
Sarah: Oh right. But it could be different with his sister.
Mia: It won't be.
Sarah: How are you so sure?
Mia: Because you're like his favorite person in the entire world. There's no way he'd love you less for that.
Sarah: Ok

3 days ago:

Sarah: I know who I am, I know what I like. I'm ready to admit it to myself, you and a few close friends. But I'm not ready to come out just yet.
Mia: That's perfectly ok. As long as you're sure.
Sarah: I'm sure.
Mia: That's great Sarah! I'm really happy for you.

Those text messages honestly got me through this month. If it wasn't for them I don't know if I would've been able to handle being without her. But it was all worth it. She finally knows who she is, and I think I do too.

Sarah P.O.V

I had texted Mia a few times in the past month. I missed her a lot. I saw somewhere that you should take some time alone and think to yourself and others that said you should talk to someone. The truth is that there is no real answer to what you should do. Just, what makes you comfortable. And I was comfortable talking to Mia. If I hadn't I think I would've been lost.
I needed to tell Mia everything I felt. I was in the car and ready to pour my heart out.

3 Hours ago:

I'm sitting at home. I had told Mia I knew who I was 3 days ago. And that's true. But I was still figuring some things out. Mia wasn't the only person I had been texting this whole month. She helped a lot but I was mostly talking to my ex again. I needed to gain a new perspective. I needed to know why I felt like I did and what exactly was it that I felt.

I haven't talked to him today. I've been home all day. Today was different. I had always tried and relaxed and maybe watched some tv. But today I just stared at 4 walls and literally have just been thinking today.

I thought about Mia and my ex. I kept trying to put two and two together. I knew I loved Mia that was a sure thing. I just needed to figure out if I loved her as more than a friend. I decided to stop thinking and I was getting a snack. Food always helped me. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bag of chips. I smiled when I saw what type of flavor. It was Mia's favorite. I guess I bought it for movie night. I loved to see the look on her face every time I pulled them out. Just her cute adorable little smile. I sighed and then realized I love Mia. Oh my god. I love Mia! I ran out the door closing it behind me as I grabbed my keys. I wasn't going to sit there like an idiot after I realized what I felt for her.

I needed to go to her. I wanted to make things official, I didn't care about anything else. I just wanted to declare my love for her. I ran in my car and drove as fast as I could towards her house. I was ready to tell her everything. I could feel the blood pumping through my veins. So many thoughts going through my mind. I want to be with her. I need to be with her.

I was almost to her house when I started hearing sirens behind me. A cop was telling me to pull over. "Crap." I pulled over and waited for the cop to get out of his car. I rolled my window down and looked up at the man in the black uniform.

"Ma'am do you know how fast you were going?" "Pretty fast?" "You were going 85 mph." "That's not so bad." "With a 45 mph speed limit it is." "I'm sorry officer, it's just I just realized I'm inlove with my best friend and I really need to tell her." "Ma'am that's great but I'm going to have to write you a ticket." "Even for such a pretty girl like me?" "Ma'am you just told me youre inlove with a girl, do you really think I'm going to fall for that?" "Right." He ripped off the ticket from his notebook and gave it to me. "Good luck with the girl." "Thanks." He walked back into his police car and drove away. I hit my head against the steering wheel accidently setting off my horn then rolled up my window and drove away. I'm coming Mia.