FAUX (Hiatus)

4

After taking off her shoes, she opened the lights in the living room and plopped herself on the couch. Silence was all she had in here, she reached for the remote control and turned the television on.

The local news is on, she closed her eyes and sighed. Kisses wondered how things would have been if he had not left her, she wondered if she could bear keeping their marriage a secret.

Suddenly, a familiar tune came in. She opened her eyes and stared at the television, the news had just finished and the teleserye he was currently in is already on.

She wondered, how would the story progress this time around now that he is gone.

The face of Maymay appeared, and this time she is with Edward. She almost bawled her tears out as Edward lovingly touched Maymay's cheek. Her heart ached at the thought that she should be the one with him, that somehow even after everything she felt so insecure of being kept a secret from everyone.

She should be happy for Maymay, she scolded herself as soon as such thoughts bombarded her. She stared at the television once more, this time they kissed. This was not what she wanted to see, she grabbed the remote control and turned it off.

It was painful, seeing him have this connection to her ate May. Then she went to the comfort room and decided to have a warm bath.

It seems the only thing that could relax her, but as she soak in it only made her cry.

"Minahal mo ba talaga ako? After all this time Ed, bakit ganito yung nararamdaman ko? Bakit ba kasi iniwan mo ako ng walang panghahawakan?" She asked addressing to the deceased love of her life. Then she laughed. She laughed because of how how stupid she sounds.

Why is she even asking him, she thought to herself. He is gone forever and she will never get answers. She chided herself.

Then she wondered, what could the letter hold?

Immediately, she took her bathrobe and wrapped it on herself and decided to see what the letter contains.

She tore the white envelope from the side and took the letter inside it. She took a deep breath and steeled herself for whatever is written in the letter.

But as ahe laid her eyes on to whom the letter was addressed, she wanted to tear the letter in an instant.

It was not for her just as tito Kev had expected, and then her world began to crumble once more.

"Kaya pala Ed." She said trying not to crumple the letter in her hand. "Kaya pala hindi mo ako kayang ipaglaban sa lahat." She said and bawled her eyes once more.

The letter was for someone else.

It was for her ate May.

She folded the letter as the tears still taint her cheeks. She wants to read it so bad, but she knows it is not for her to read no matter how bad she wants to know more than him saying sorry to her.

She threw the letter on the floor as she tried to calm herself from what she just saw. The letter was not for her, and yes it was painful. For some reason it is.

"Kisses, stay strong." She chanted.

"Kahit wala na si Ed kaya mo, okay?" She said as her voice began to crack, and tears threaten to spill. She bit her lip hard and sniffed.

A ring on her phone distubed her, she took it from her bedside table and answered it.

"Kisses!" It was her mom, she wanted to let her tears out but she knows she has to be strong infront of them, most of all to her parents.

"Are you alright? Have you ate dinner? Ylona called me." She said without a moment's pause. "Mom, I'm fine." She shortly said.

"Baby, just tell me everything. I know this is still about him, just let it all out." Her mom said and it made her tear up, truly she knows what to say in such moments.

"Mom, okay lang ako. I will be, kakayanin ko 'to trust me." She said and tried her best to smile.

"I love you mom." She said with so much tiredness evident in her system.

"I love you too Kisses." Her mom said, and with those words she felt so much better.