This In The Now

Reality It Comes (steve rogers x reader)

warnings: talking of sad emotions, confused with life choices, alcohol drinking

A/N: this oneshot is more of reflective reader from the previous 'parts' of this cherished series of mine, so certain events in past 'parts' are referenced. (very lightly) Also oc Agent Adrian Samuel Hernandez is mentioned again (from the informal pt 12 of this in the now; i.e. Before You Go) ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY STEVIE!

The stars were winking into view, as the sun's rays faded into the sky. It seemed as if all her hopes were alive and all the fear and doubt faded along with the sun's rays.
"Are you waiting for him?" Y/N glanced over to Nat, nursing a soda over the beers that were stocked in the fridge.
"Waiting for who?" Y/N said, trying to play the innocent card. Natasha passed Y/N a glass tumbler of soda with a smirk.
"I think you know who I'm referring to." The assassin was quiet after that, creating annoyance to the agent next to her.
"Well I'm thinking of three guys in my head, so take a pick," she replied bitterly.
After her date with Agent Adrian Samuel Hernandez, things with her two best friends, Steven Grant Rogers and James Buchanan Barnes have been, well, awkward. There was always a mutual understanding with mostly everyone in the team that the three of them had something brewing way down low, that neither of the three ever really acknowledged except when they were inebriated. Which only happened once for Y/N with Nat and Tony at another infamous party.
"Did you even invite Hernandez to this lazy get-together of Stark's?" Nat said, breaking her friend's train of thought. Y/N took a huge gulp of her drink, hoping the fizz from the soda would burn down her throat like alcohol. No such luck. There's nothing like a shot that would do the trick...
"N-no, I didn't," she said finally, setting her now empty glass on the ledge.
"So he didn't ask you out on another date?" the other female inquired.
"He did ask, but I declined," she replied in a rush. Natasha raised her eyebrows.
"Why?" she asked. "Were you hoping that someone else would come along?" Y/N deeply sighed, glancing into the city-skyline. There were so many hopes and dreams out in the world, and deep down, she kinda hoped that hers would come true too.
"I don't know." she finally said, her voice breaking as tears started dripping down her chin.
"Oh Y/N.." Nat said, wrapping her arms around her best friend. "I promise that this uncertainty sucks, but things will work out."
"But when?!" she burst out in a sob, "when will it ever?"
"I'm sorry, but I just don't know." Nat let out a deep sigh.

Surprisingly, it was a quiet party, and no one bothered either of them as they sipped down their drinks that progressed from soda to wine. Either of the men that Y/N was waiting for didn't come through the elevator doors on the roof, and she began to gulp down the wine quicker and quicker every time it was another partygoer.

"I think you've had too much to drink." Nat said, as she started to slur her words together. Yeah, they had a lot of wine.
"And you haven't?" she countered, slowly placing the now empty, wine bottles to the ground as gracefully as she could.
"Unlike you, I can hold my drinks." Nat slurred, waving her glass around as the wine sloshed to spill on the floor. Y/N rolled her eyes, then dragged her friend to the bar, ordering her a glass (or two) of water.
"Hey, you two havin' fun?" The two women turned around, although one was flopping around, like a fish. His blonde hair was swept carefully, giving the essence of purpose yet carefree. His crystal clear blue eyes seemed to have looked deep into Y/N's, as if searching for something.
"Hey Steve," she said soft enough for him to lean towards her, her voice too soft in the midst of a party.
"Sorry I'm late," he said, reaching out his arm. She looked at Nat to check is she was okay being alone, but Nat had already given her a sly smile, accompanied with a wink and a raise of her glass.
"You two go ahead, I'm fine here with bartender Tom." Her voice was evening out, the slur in her voice absent. Y/N gave her a nod, then waved goodbye. She took Steve's arm, as he led her through the throng of people that crowded the semi-dance floor.
"How've you been?" Steve said, as they comfortably leaned against the ledge of the roof in the corner of all the party shenanigans. She shrugged, not sure what to say.
"I'm alright, I guess." she breathed out. Steve reached over and wrapping her into his arms as they both looked out to the glowing, vibrant city.
"I've heard that you went out on a date." And there it was. The statement that she dreaded hearing from Steve, even Bucky. Her conflicted feelings swirled in her stomach, gripping her still and silent.
"Yeah, I did." she breathed out, looking down, her eyes away from Steve's gaze. She didn't want to see his expression,
"If you don't mind me asking, with who?"
"It was with Agent Adrian Samuel Hernandez." Y/N almost chuckled at the amount of times she had said his full name. "But it was okay. It got kinda awkward in the middle of dinner, he hesitantly asked me out, but I declined. And then we agreed that us being friends and coworkers would be much better."
"Oh?" he said, shifting slightly. "So no more dates for you?" She breathed out heavily, as if dreading the question.
"I don't know," she said, "I'm not really sure what my life is anymore." Steve didn't know what to say after that.
"Are you sure you didn't drink a lot tonight?" he finally said with a breathy chuckle. Y/N laughed, although the grim look on her face didn't change after Steve's joking. "Since you're not feeling the greatest, why don't we head out of this party?"
"Won't Tony get mad that we left?" Or at least annoyed? I mean the team is kinda the 'main attraction' of his parties usually," she said, air quoting with a goofy smile.
"There's that smile that I love." Steve burst out, then he led her through the crowd once again. Y/N blushed, thankful that he wasn't looking at her or else she might've turned even redder.

As they were walking out of the party, she spotted Tony and Nat talking, thankfully somewhat sober. She gave a quick wave once they caught her eye, both with smirks and gesturing dirty business. Y/N rolled her eyes, and walked to Steve who was waiting in the elevator.
"Who was that?" he said, punching the ground floor button.
"Tony and Nat. I was saying a proper goodbye, unlike somebody." She nudged Steve with a wink. "And I thought you were the polite one." They both snickered as the glowing numbers in the elevator descended to display 'G'.
"Well, I gotta keep Tony on his toes, Y/N." he said grinning, walking out of the elevator.
"Yeah, one thing will surely keep Tony on his toes. What else did you do?" Steve shrugged, frowning slightly.
"I dunno, that was my first one." They both were in fits of laughter, and the lobby man was kind enough to call out a taxi for them.
"Thank you," she said, as he shut the door closed behind Steve. "Wow Steve, you're being rude again. Hey! That's your second one!" He shoved her softly, shaking his head.
"Man, I'll never catch a break."
"You don't need one with your serum!" And the taxi was filled with groans and giggles.
"Ma'am? Sir? Where do you need to go?" the taxi driver interrupted but with a smile at the realization of who was in his vehicle.
"111 Lawrence Street, Brooklyn," Steve said.
The whole car ride was filled with chatter, mostly Y/N making fun of Steve and Steve groaning, but the time sped quickly.

Once they arrived at their apartment complex, Steve paid for the cab while Y/N rifled for her keys in her clutch purse.
"I swear I had them in here, but I don't know where!" Steve snorted.
"That seems to be the statement of the night with you." She stopped for a second, glaring at him.
"Then why don't you find your keys?!" she exclaimed, waving her hands in frustration.
"I left them at home, because I thought you would have them. And Bucky said that he would be home." Y/N dropped her purse at his statement.
"Bucky's hOME?!!" she screeched. "You mean I was scrambling to find a key when that bastard's home?!" Steve sheepishly grinned.
"And I forgot my phone at the apartment as well." Now Y/N was the one groaning.
"God dammit, Steve. The only thing you have in your life put together is having you wallet with you."
"It's rude to let the women pay!" Y/N groaned while she was calling Bucky.
"Hey Buck?" she said once he picked up.
"Yeah?" he replied, confused. "What's up? Aren't you at the party?"
"No, Steve and I left early for some pizza and binge watching a tv show." Bucky chuckled on the phone.
"And let me guess, Rogers forgot both his phone and keys?"
"YES!" There was further laughing on the phone, enough for Steve to awkwardly grin at Y/N again. She retaliated with a glare.
"Just wait one sec, I'll come down."
"Thanks Buck, you're a lifesaver."
"No problem." Then they both clicked off. Y/N turned to Steve with a raised brow.
"So this isn't the first time you've done this." Steve shrugged his shoulders with a smirk.
"Maybe not."

•••

[[tumblr tags]] #man tony has a lot of parties. #lol i write so many of them help. #this doesn't really correlate with steve's birthday other than that it's posted on his birthday and it's kinda about steve (for the most part)

hope you enjoyed! please leave any comments and {i jUST NEED MOTIVATION TO WRITE THE NEXT ONE ASAP. also the next one will 97% be about stucky/reader bc i know many people like that ship the most... so do I!!! lol.. also doing camp nanowrimo this month, so the next one'll come out sooner than a month difference.. sorry bout that...} yeah.. have a great fourth of july (if you're from the US) and a good day for everyone else! :D