Paper Hearts ▪ Lams

17

September 9th, 2016

John's Apartment Complex

Senior Year

//I hate this part, paper hearts, and I'll hold a piece of yours//

John opened the door, holding ten dollars in his hand, "Hey, Jack, listen we're short again, could you just put it on our tab?" John looked up and found Alexander standing there, his eyes wide.

"Alexander?" John said in shock, "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I looked your dad up in the phone book and the address lead me here," Alexander explained, looking around the molding hallway.

"Why'd you look for my address?" John furrowed his eyebrows as his face turned red with embarrassment. No one was supposed to find out about this, especially not Alexander.

"You've seemed kind of distant lately, and I wanted to check on you," Alexander said, "Can I, uh, come in?"

John shook his head, "Thank you for the thought, but, um, no you may not," he slowly closed the door behind him, stepping out into the hallway. He left a sliver of the door open, just in case.

Alexander's eyebrows knitted together, "Why? Are you okay?" he tried to step past John, but John stepped in front of him.

"I'm okay, Lexi. Look, you should go home," John said sternly.

"John, you're not okay! You have a tab with the pizza delivery service? You live in this rundown apartment? And what the hell are all those bruises? You're covered with them!" Alexander exclaimed, taking John's face in his hands and examining the marks that were left there.

John cursed himself for not covering them up. He pushed Alexander's arms away forcefully, "Don't worry about it, okay? It's my life, not yours! I'm perfectly fine!" John shouted.

Alexander stepped back. He had never seen John like this before. But he noticed it as pain, not anger.

"John, I want to help you-" he started calmly.

"Well maybe I don't want your help!" John yelled.

"I just want to see you okay, John!" Alexander fired back.

"Well here I am, perfectly okay and functional!" John yelled, dramatically motioning towards his body.

"No, you're not John!"

"Stop telling me what I am! It is my decision! I can be whoever the hell I want and love whoever the hell I want, dad!" John screamed. His breath hitched once he realized his mistake.

Alexander's eyes watered and he gasped, "Your dad?" he whispered.

John's eyes filled with tears as he stared at Alexander.

"Jacky?" a soft voice came from behind the door.

John turned and found his little sister, Martha, standing in the doorway with her favorite teddy bear tucked under her arm. He blinked away his tears and plastered on a smile for the five year old beneath him. He crouched down and held her shoulders.

"What is it, darling?" he asked softly.

"I heard yelling, and it scared me. Is daddy going to hurt you again?" she asked softly. Tears flowed down her cheeks and her lip quivered. John's heart broke at the sight of his sister so distressed.

"Oh, no, darling. I just got a little stressed, that's all. Daddy is still at work, he won't be back until tomorrow," he said, wiping her tears away with his thumbs.

"Okay," she sniffled, "As long as you're okay, Jacky," she buried her head in John's chest. John sobbed silently, holding the little girl close to his chest. He ran his fingers through her soft hair, thanking god for her.

"The baby is also awake now, and I think he's hungry," Martha pulled away from John and wiped her tears.

"Okay," he stood up and kissed the top of her head. He turned to Alexander, who had tears running down his face, "I'm sorry, Lexi. Um, would you like to come in?"

Alexander nodded and followed John into the small apartment.

"Don't take your shoes off, there are glass shards everywhere," John said. Alexander looked down at the floor, and sure enough, there were broken bottles of beer and whiskey and liquor scattered in every corner, their pieces thrown about the room.

John picked up Martha and put her on the torn up couch, "I'll be right back, okay?" Martha nodded. John walked to the other side of the room, where a crib was placed against the wall. A broken down mobile hang above it, spinning slowly.

"Hi, baby boy," John said softly, picking up the baby and placing him on his hip, "Are you hungry?" he bounced the baby, receiving giggles from the small child. John smiled and walked back over to where Martha and Alexander were sitting.

"Alexander, this is Jack Jr.," John said, "Jacky, this is my best friend, Alexander."

Alexander stood up and walked over to the baby with a smile, "Hi there," he said softly. Jack reached for his hand and squeezed Alexander's finger softly. John chuckled.

"Alexander, this is Martha. Martha, this is my best friend, Alexander," Martha smiled and Alexander waved at the small girl.

There was a knock at the door.

"Dinner!" Martha chirped happily, "I'm so hungry!"

"I'll be right back. Martha, grab some napkins?" John took out the ten from his pocket and opened the door.

"Hi Jack!" he said, handing the money to the delivery boy.

"Hey John, how's it going?" he asked.

John sighed with a smile on his face, "It's going," he laughed.

"Do you want me to set this down for you?" Jack asked.

John nodded, "If you could?"

Jack smiled and set down three boxes of pizza on the small table next to the door.

"Wait, I only ordered one pizza," John said.

"Well, you got three," Jack smiled, putting the ten dollars in his pocket.

"But I can only pay for one right now-" John tried to protest, but Jack interrupted him.

"They're on the house, John."

John smiled gratefully, "Thank you, so much," he whispered.

Jack nodded and left the apartment.

"Now, who's ready to eat?" John asked with a smile.

Alexander walked over and carried the boxes of pizza to the couch.

"Thanks, Lexi," John said softly. Alexander smiled.

They all sat down and ate quickly, given that they hadn't had a real meal in almost a week.

"Well," John started, wiping pizza sauce off of Jack Jr.'s cheek. The baby giggled.

"I guess I should explain, huh?"