Soulmate

24. One Of The 100

What's a Soulmate?

It's that someone who makes you a better person. No, actually they don't make you a better person. You do that yourself because they inspire you.

Clarke

Jake seemed to grow up like wildfire! One minute she was cooing down at a baby who would simply gurgle and maybe laugh, but the next Clarke was yelling at Bellamy to "LOOK!" When he crawled for the first time, or when Bellamy came running to her breathless telling her in mostly inaudible slurs that he just said "dada". He did in fact say it again in front of Clarke and that's all he said for the next few months before he started picking up words like "hi" and "bye" and of course, "mama".

People were joking about the day he would start bringing girls home but Clarke chose not to think about that and laughed it off.

His head of hair was an overgrown rainforest of brown curls and Clarke had to cut it almost weekly to keep it in check.

She'd also taken up the task of doing the same for Bellamy. She would giggle all the while, as Jake sat in his lap, fiddling or eating (making a mess). Two in the same. Except for the eyes.

Yes, the cabin quickly became their cabin and Clarke had grown so used to waking up beside him.

Their little boy was growing up fast and Clarke couldn't have been happier, and all the while neither of them spoke about how thin Bellamy had gotten, or how she occasionally found a bald patch beneath his hair while cutting it. He's been pulling it out again she'd think, she knew he was even though she never asked him about it. No, she never mentioned the growing darkness beneath his eyes and they casually brushed over it when he started taking less shifts at work.

And just as Clarke never bothered him with questions, he never bothered her with complaints! Things were almost like normal, almost.

He was growing as a dad despite it all, Clarke had been able to go back to helping her mum in medical, perfectly comfortable leaving him to watch Jake, not that there was no one else - the whole camp loved him, Octavia and her new boyfriend Lincoln were forever offering to watch him. Octavia seemed to love playing auntie.

Clarke sat down in the Cabin now, it was cluttered but empty and she needed some quiet after her day at work. There was peace with the grounders and it was the height of summer, a group of teenagers had gone cliff jumping and a couple had come back with bad injuries.

They had laughed it off and their friends had mocked them but it had taken up most of Clarke's day. She looked out the window now and saw everyone milling around, lively in the light evening. She saw other delinquents, Monty with an arm around Harper talking to Jasper and Raven, and she saw teenagers from the Ark. Sometimes she felt separate from them, older, but she loved the life she had, no matter how challenging.

Bellamy was always telling her how thankful he was for the way things turned out, is always telling her she made him a better person but she knew she hadn't. He had done that himself, he didn't have to be the father to Jake, he could have easily gone about his life, a new girl each night, he could be out there laughing and having fun with the others instead of sitting somewhere watching a child.

Clarke knew he wouldn't change that decision for the world but sometimes she just wondered...

Clarke rubbed her face and blinked a couple times, pushing off the table to stand.

She had to get out of the messy cabin.

So she brushed her hair, changed her sweaty top to a long sleeved one and went outside.

"Hey! Mum by day, party queen by night!" Jasper cried when he saw her, throwing an arm around her shoulder.

Clarke frowned, "think you got the wrong person there! Well not the mum bit." Clarke laughed, taking a drink from Monty when he passed her one.

"Nah, Clarke you're fun! Come on, drink!" Jasper laughed.

"Drink!" Raven joined in, lifting her own cup.

"Drink!" Monty and Harper cheered and Clarke's chest swelled with love for them and she straightened up, lifting the moonshine and tipping it down her throat in one swift motion.

They all cheered and she laughed, "Come on guys, give me a challenge!" Feeling like one of the 100 again, not the leader, not the mother, nothing but, a friend.

Suddenly out of nowhere, water sprayed Clarke's face as a jet of water shot into the back of Jasper's head.

Jasper screamed like a girl and the group fanned out as he stumbled, pulling something from his belt and aiming what looked like a strange sort of home made gun.

Jasper, his hair soaked and dripping water down his back, aimed.

Clarke followed his gaze and saw he was pointing it at the meat shed.

"Come out with your hands up!" Jasper said in a fake fancy voice. "Weapon on the floor."

Slowly someone came out from behind the meat shed and Clarke folded her arms. Bellamy.

He winked at her, his hands up, a gun like Jaspers in his right hand.

"Okay, easy It's going down." Bellamy said, slowly bending.

At the last minute he sprayed water at Jasper's legs.

Jasper pulled the trigger, jumping away from the jets.

Then Jasper ran away and Bellamy went after him. Harper and Monty almost jumped into Clarke trying to get out of the way.

They all laughed at the two idiots.

"Jasper's gonna die out there. I've gotta help him!" Monty said, also producing a water gun from his belt before charging after them.

"Well it's always good to know they are doing something productive with their time." Raven chuckled and Clarke laughed.

"Better that than Cliff jumping." Clarke scoffed.

"That's fun when you do it right...which most of those idiots did not!" Harper giggled, looking over to where the group of teens sat, 5 boys and 2 girls, 3 of them with some bandage, plaster or cast on of sorts.

Suddenly Bellamy was coming back, he grabbed Clarke by the hand and she was pulled away from Raven and Harper without a chance to speak.

She ran behind him and he pulled her around behind the dropship where they finally slowed. Bellamy let Clarke's hand drop and stood with his back against the wall, looking around the side of the ship.

"Bellamy what on earth-"

"Shhh" he said.

She shushed. And waited.

"Okay I think I lost them." He said and, still panting he turned to Clarke with a huge grin on his face.

"What is wrong with you? Where's Jake?" She asked as he put the water gun back in his belt.

"It's just fun princess." He chuckled, "and don't worry he's with your mum." He said, moving closer.

"And why exactly have you dragged me here?" Clarke asked, trying to come off as calm and relaxed, when in reality her heart was pounding.

"Because I haven't seen you all day, and I wasn't going to do this in front of them!" He said, pushing her back up against the dropship, intertwining their fingers before pinning her hands to the wall and kissing her.

She leaned into him and smiled into the kiss as he let her hands go and began to run them through her hair.

She laughed, relaxing, and gripped his neck, running her hands down his chest and then around his waist, trying not to think about how she could feel his ribs and his spine when she did.

That night, when she lay in his arms, it really hit her just how weak he had become. The arms around her felt almost foreign and she began to cry helplessly and silently.

She sank further into him and he pulled her closer. With his warmth surrounding her it was easier to forget and eventually she was able to sleep away the bad thoughts.