If Friends were set in 2017

Instagram

The scene starts with the Friends in Central Perk.

Phoebe: hey joey! You got a fan account for your show! The username is 'DrDrakeRamorayLover' that's so cool!

Joey blushes.

Joey: those fans can get pretty crazy.

Chandler looks at Joey skeptically.

Chandler: you made it yourself, didn't you?

Joey: yeah...

M: why would you do that?

J: I wanted to create more hype for the show.

Joey smiles and nods along with Rachel.

Ross: so uh, how many followers do you have?

J: 212561. I just checked this morning! Most are devoted fans... and a couple of my own accounts...

Joey finishes lamely, revealing he has created fake accounts in attempts to seem more famous.

Everyone raises their eyebrows.

Phoebe: I have six hundred.

The Friends look surprised and confused on why Pheobe has a lot.

Phoebe: what? A lot of my friends from the streets have Instagram. I also follow some people from prison! Y'know, fellow friends.

Pheobe waves her hand like it's nothing and takes a sip of coffee.

Monica: wait woah woah! You guys have so many followers! More than me!

Monica is starting to yell. *better keep the plates at a safe distance so it won't 'slip' from her hands.

Chandler: why, how many do you have?

Monica: I only have 200. I thought that was a reasonable number. But now, hearing what you guys have, 200 is sucky.

Monica pouts and crosses her arms. She quickly recovers.

Monica: Ok, by the end of the day I will have more more followers than all of you suckers combined!

Rachel: see now, I don't know what this whole big deal about 'followers' are. I mean it's not even that big of a deal!

Rachel scoffs like it's no big deal but we can tell she is hiding something.

Ross: how many do you have, Rachel?

Rachel: oh you know... seven thousand

Rachel says this casually and scratches her ear.

Ross, chandler, Monica, Pheobe, Joey: what!?

Rachel: what? I have a lot from fashion. Once I got Ralph Lauren to follow me, a bunch of people did. Ha! Funny how that works.

Chandler: well it's better than my four followers.

Ross: you only have four? But there's six of us...

Chandler just realizes this.

Chandler: hey! Which one of you isn't following me?

Joey: hey, don't look at me!

Pheobe, Rachel and Ross insist they follow him. Eyes fall on Monica.

Monica: sorry...

Chandler looks outraged.

Monica: it's only because I have to follow a certain number of people! It has to be all even numbers!

Chandler looks on his phone to confirm.

Chandler: hey! Which one of you unfollowed me this time?

Chandler looks at his phone and his sad amount of followers. Once he realizes who it is,

Chandler: Rachel!

Rachel: what, don't blame me! I can't have my work colleagues knowing I follow...

Chandler: follow what?

Rachel: just a smart, charming guy like yourself...

Rachel trails.

Ross: well I have 100. I think that's a respectable number. I only follow friends and family. I don't go around letting random people follow me.

Ross eyes rachel, joey and phoebe.

P: hey I know them! Everyone on the street knows me. I was the 'scary bitch'.

Joey: oh please, they're all work friends.

Joey tries to pass off the fact his followers are work friends, contradicting what he says earlier. Ross notices this.

Ross: really, all seven hundred?

Joey: yeah, sure why not?

P: well, they all know me. I'm so popular!

M: not after tonight, honey. I'm making it my goal to gain followers!