of midnight.

her

The anger overtakes me, not letting me speak throughout the shroud of doubt that has been plastered into my mind. It's taped to my mind, never letting me forget. A post-it that won't stick off. She knows. She knows how aggravating it is, and won't stop.

She takes my hard work, covering her flaws with makeup. Not letting it show. But my flaws still remain, my face cracking and my heart already shattered. She continues.

Knowingly, she takes away my life. My heart. My life. Making friends with the friends I have, pretending to be me. And she thinks I don't know. She covers my doubts with her smiles, with her words that are covered in the sludge of pity and depression.

I run across the sky, tears pouring out, voice yelling and disappearing into the abyss, my hands grasping at the air in an attempt to leave this. I can't continue watching. 

I yell out to the earth, the one that has never answered me.

To hurry up and delete her, to hurry up and fix this being that overtakes me.

But I know that I'm not special.

I have to reassure myself I'm different. That I can be better than her. She can take my talents, my pride, my friends, and my world. But she can't take me.

I can't continue suffering. This can't be fair.

Please hear my prayer, I yell, of the one you have ignored. Of the one you have cursed, the one that can't sleep. I can't do this anymore.
I can't continue to blindly smile, to ignore that which is obvious.

That she is better than me.

I have to find something different, to make myself better. To fix myself. To cover up those cracks. I have to grasp at the slightest of lines, to pull myself out of the water I've been submerged in. To bring myself out of the crowd of people that stands submerged, all those that are the same.

I need to reach her, who has been looking down on me, knowing that I was drowning.

But maybe I've been doing something wrong this whole time. Maybe I've been thinking about it wrong. Looking towards her and not knowing,

That it was me that was copying her the whole time.