Okay, welcome to the authentic last chapter of Answer Me This! Hopefully, you enjoy and this satisfies you! I am very proud of this story! Bear with me because this chapter is going to be a lot of dialogue!
I am extremely grateful for all of you who continue to read and support my work. It enlightens me that people find happiness in what makes me happy. So thank you, all of you, sincerely.
Carpe diem until I die,
-Caroline
~~~ (Your perspective)
I love her was written. Underlined... eight times.
But...
Todd was nowhere to be seen.
~
Panic surged through me like poison, inhibiting my optimism. Where was he? He said it didn't matter where he went, but little did he know it meant my life.
I scrambled around the room searching for clues. Maybe he wrote in his notebook his plans or his intentions. Aside from that, I had nothing else to deliver me ideas. It appeared he did not come back here, but rather, he went straight to another place. Without any idea of his whereabouts, I began to tremble again. I attempted to read his notebook hurriedly.
Poetry blessed the pages. He even copied down Thoreau's quote,
I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life. To put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I had come to die, discover that I had not lived.
Tears threatened to escape my eyes as I found poems about me.
Infinite. Loving had never been so easy. She was a lovable soul. Endlessly, unapologetically, infinitely lovable.
...did he love me? Had I thought wrongly before?
Carpe diem screamed from the adventure of her words. I wonder, would kissing her release the adventurer inside me?
No, this can't be. He told us he did not love anyone, that he was not interested in anyone. Not me.
Power is defined by her eyes. Exquisite is defined by her soul. And love is defined by her existence.
What the hell is going on?
I stood upon the desk to view her from a new perspective. Thank you, Keating. For you have taught me how to love a limitless soul.
Did he love me?
Y/N, Y/N, Y/N, such a name instills love before even experiencing her.
"Todd..." I smiled wildly at these words.
I could see her standing with me, to my side, as we YAWP from the rooftops of our own world.
My smile degenerated fast after a slight turn of a page. His writing, usually neat and precise, became muddled and scratched in the paper, scarring it.
I am losing her. I am losing her. I am losing her.
Poetic expression vanished. All that was written was repeated lines of doubt, dismay, sorrow.
She couldn't love someone like me. She couldn't love someone like me. She couldn't love someone like me.
My stress instantly increased. I was in his shoes, perceiving his thoughts. It was pure chaos.
Pure chaos.
Her soulmate is out there. Her soulmate is out there. Her soulmate is out there.
I clutched the notebook angrily, bending its form. I was infuriated while overflowing with sadness.
It's not me. It's not me. It's not me.
And that's okay.
Tears finally streamed out of my feeble eyes so forcefully, they fell onto the pages. I was incapacitated and gasping for air. I had been finally split into nothing. I threw his notebook vigorously. It struck the window before landing defeatedly onto the floor. I covered my eyes with the back of my forearm and my knees were overpowered by the weight of my emotions. I kneeled down, conquered. He used to love me.
Not anymore.
I lost her.
I lost him.
"Y/N..." I hear a faint voice from beside me. However, no one is there.
"Y/N, it's me."
The tears subdued momentarily. "No... N-Neil, that can't be you. This is fake, fake like the love I thought Todd and I had-"
"Shh. Y/N. No more. How can you be so sure this is hopeless?"
"Because! Neil, I bet you read his poems. You sneaky bastard. You read it all, didn't you? You knew everything, I bet. He doesn't love me anymore, it's obvious."
"You can't be serious, Y/N!" the voice of Neil bellowed. "I read everything, you're right. I knew everything. I should have told you, I know, I know. But this isn't in my hands anymore! It's in yours! I can't repair this anymore, but you can!"
"What is there to repair? There's nothing left."
I felt his spirit near me. It felt lively and comforting. The voice of Neil said nothing for a while.
"Carpe diem until you die. Don't waste this life." Without a caution, his spirit vanished. I shuddered. I didn't want to be alone, not now.
"Carpe diem..." I whispered. I stood myself again and slowly advanced to the window.
The cave.
"...until I die."
He was in the cave.
I fiercely bolted out of Welton and directly towards the Dead Poets Society cave.
~~~
"It's been a while," Meeks commented.
Charlie rolled his eyes. "She has to find him first," he retorted while taking another puff of his cigarette. "Todd really must have gone far. Far enough to get alone."
"I wonder what he's thinking about," Pitts inquired.
"This is worrying me a lot more than I think it should. Can we go catch them now?" Knox worriedly asked.
Charlie tried to recollect the group. "Gentlemen, we have a little thing called a situation going on here. And we are all going to stay here thinking happy thoughts, yes? Because if anything goes even mildly wrong, I'll go sweep her off her feet and you three can reconcile Todd. Sound good?"
"Not in the slightest," Knox replied.
"Look, all I'm saying is Y/N is a mature lady and Todd is struggling with something, alright? She can handle this. Let's just hope Todd is somewhere nearby so she can help him out."
"I actually kind of agree with Charlie on this one," Meeks added. "We should leave them to it."
"I don't know, man," Pitts breathed. "Something tells me this ain't right."
