Beautifully Broken: Chris Jackson and Mandy Gonzalez||Complete||

Three (Baby Talk)

(Mandy's POV)(3 weeks later)

I had a doctors appointment. The nurse had just left and I was now waiting for the doctor. I swung my legs back and forth as I sat on the table. My hands shook for whatever reason. The doctor walked in then and smiled at me. "Hello Mandy. How are we feeling today?" Dr Emerson asked.

"Very sluggish. That's why I scheduled. I'm not feeling like myself. I've gotten two migraines this week. I don't normally get headaches."

"Can you lift your shirt please?" I did as asked and the doctor pressed on my stomach. "Is there any chance you could be pregnant?"

"I'm 39. I can't be pregnant. Can I?"

"Yes. You very well can get pregnant again."

After I took a pregnancy test, it was a known fact that I was pregnant. At least between me and my doctor. Tears stung my eyes as I left.

Questions bounced around my head. What would Chris say? Were we even prepared to have a baby? Was I prepared? I rubbed my belly and prayed to the sky.

When I got home, Chris sat in the kitchen. "Hey baby. I took today off...have you been crying?" He said. All I did was nod. Chris hugged me gently. "Baby, what's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it. Not right now." I didn't realize then that my answer caused him so much pain.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm sorry Chris." He swiped my hair from where it fell into my eyes. I swayed slightly and let tears well in my eyes. But I didn't look up at Chris. I just stared at my hands which were placed on the back of a chair. "I'm sorry." I mumbled before I sobbed into Chris' chest. I gripped his shirt in my balled fists.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. Baby...what is going on."

"I still don't want to talk about it."

"Mandy please."

"Chris no. I'm not talking about the b...problem...right now."

"Baby, you're worrying me. Wait...doctors appointment...shutting down...not talking with me...hon, are you? You're not..? Mandy, are you..?" Chris couldn't piece together his thoughts.

"Chris...I'm pregnant." I broke down.

"Oh my god! We're gonna have a baby? We're having a baby! This is great!"

"Chris, remember the last two times we were going to have a baby? I miscarried. Twice! Do you know what that's like?! Knowing that your child died inside of you?! Of course you don't! You didn't wake up bleeding, knowing you lost a living being inside of you!" I shouted. I wanted to punch at him, scream horrible things at him, but I couldn't. I felt broken inside. I knew that violence would just give him a reason to get upset with me.

"Mandy, we'll take every precaution to make sure we don't lose this baby. Okay? I'll make sure to be here for you. Just breathe."

"Chris, I can't lose another baby. I just can't."

"And you won't. I promise." Chris held me. "I love you so much. Hermosa." He kissed my forehead. I held onto him and refused to let go.

"I love you too." I said and still clung onto him. "I'm three weeks along. I just...there's still so much time for a miscarriage to happen again. I'm so scared."

"Do you want to wait to tell people?" Chris asked and I nodded. "I've been meaning to ask you this. For a while now. Will you..." my phone rang, interrupting Chris.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hi Man. It's Kare. Um I know it's short notice, but can you watch Mateo? Lin and I have a school thing we have to go to. Parent teacher conference. Please?"

"Not today Karen. I'm sorry."

"Mandy please? Please!"

"Karen, I can't. Please stop asking."

"Mandy, I don't know what is wrong with you, but I really hope you know how upsetting this is. You told me you'd help whenever I needed it."

"Karen, I'm pregnant." I said. Tears welled in my eyes.

"Oh my god. Mandy...I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say. I know that it's gonna be tough. But I also know that you're gonna have the healthiest baby ever."

"You think?"

"I know." We were silent for a while. "I'll find someone else to watch Mateo."

"Okay. Thank you. And please don't tell anyone about the baby. Please?"

"Of course not. I love you, bye Mandy."

"Love you, bye Karen." With that, we hung up and I sat on the couch. Chris sat with me.

"Okay, so Karen knows that you're pregnant. Do we tell Bella?"

"Tell Bella what?" Chris and I turned to see Bella standing in the doorway. "Mom, Dad, what's going on?"

"Bella, I'm pregnant. We're not telling people until we know for sure that we're all good. That we won't lose the baby."

"Mom...this...the past two times, it left you heartbroken. What'll happen if you miscarry again? Are you gonna shut me out? Shut Dad out? And if you actually have the baby? Will you forget about me? I don't want you guys to forget me."

"We won't forget about you baby girl." I said, getting up to hug her. She hugged back and her crutch fell to the floor with a loud clank.

"You promise?"

"I promise."

With that, the baby talk was over.

***Author's Note***

I'm not sure if I'm gonna make her miscarry again. It's a probability. But I don't know.

Comment what you think should happen. Should they have a baby, or, should she miscarry and then they adopt. Okay guys! Be kind, be smart, be productive, have fun. Most of all, be fearless!

Sincerely,
The Author (Ryeli)