Hold On Ringo

Chapter 6

Chapter 6
18 February 1965

It’s been days I haven’t been home… actually my new home is the bridge. I’ve got sleeping stuff here and it’s dry when it rains. I’m safe at this river… and no-one finds me.

I will be here till I found a gun…

I walk over street and look for people who might know where I can find a gun. I haven’t seen the boys in days. Same for my mother. I’m just done with everyone. Everyone thinks they can destroy my life. Everyone thinks they can ignore me when I just want to tell what is going on. I don’t want to be a problem anymore. All I need is a gun. The bridge and the end will come soon then… to me…

While I walk through the streets my mind is thinking and setting up some plan. I just don’t see the point in living anymore.

I sit down in a seat of a café and I start to write something.

I’m still setting up the plan. It’s about tomorrow. Tomorrow I will do it. I will stand on the bridge and end my life. Forever.

I’ve got someone who can get me a gun. And I’m waiting on her.

I close my diary and wait on her and hope this won’t take long. I look a bit around and see a girl coming in black clothes with sunglasses. She sits down at my table. “Miss Culture Red?” I ask. It’s her code name.

“Mister Blue Eye.” She replies.

“Do you have the...” my voice turns to whispering “gun?”

She nods and hands me a box. “Don’t open this till you’re doing it.” She says.

I nod and stand up. “Thanks miss.”

She stands up, gives a short nod and she walks away.

I smile and walk back to the bridge what went my new house. I’m writing there the letter which will show to everyone that this is a fault. That my whole live went wrong and blah, blah, blah…

I sit back under the bridge and start writing on a piece of paper.

To George;
Hello George, I miss you a lot my friend. You were good to me. But last time you weren’t I was about to explain what is going on in my life but you closed the door. I wanted to tell that Harry died. That I’m in a personally crisis and that mum makes very bad breakfast… I think you ordinary never thought this will be happening to me. But believe me it is. I can’t handle my life anymore. You know what I mean with anymore? I mean I’m going to end my life. When you read this it will be too late. You can’t stop me anymore. But know it is also a bit of your fault. And Paul’s fault. And John’s fault. And the fault of Harry’s dead. And Mum! She read my diary!!! You know I can’t handle that… anyway. Goodbye George.

To John;
Keep making music.

To Paul;
Try to be more friendly.

Mum;
Hold on. Stay strong. I know you can. I love you.

Everyone:
everybody on the world has a time they die. Some are soon and some are later. Today’s day. It’s mine. All I want to say is hold on. Just hold on.
love, Ringo

 

I put the letter in a flesh and throw it in the water.