Oh. My. Liza.

Cramps suck

Why is it that we let the people who mean the most to us hurt us so much?

Honestly, Liza was way better of a person to me when I just watched her on tv. Now I know her personality away from the public, she sort of sucks.

But I care about her so much.

That's the thing that sucks about it, I feel like I care so much and would do anything for her but I don't get the Same in return.

Maybe I just expect to much from her, I mean she is a super famous actress and I'm just a intern. Maybe she knows she's too good for me and I'm just a play toy while she's shooting.

I'm still moping around in my head sitting at the table read when Ashley come and sits next to me.

"Hey fresh, you okay?" She asked with concern etched on her face.

"Uh, yea just cramps you know?" I said back with a half smile.

"Yea, those are the worst, I got Advil if you need some" she replied leaning back.

"Thanks ash but I'm okay for now" I said leaning my head on my hand

As everyone poured in Liza was the last to join us.

Making brief eye contact I just looked away, not having the energy for her today.

From the corner of my eye I see that She sits next to Adam and he looks like a bear looking at a steak.

Gross.

"Okay everyone let's get this episode started shall we" Denny says clapping his hands together.

As everyone starts reading lines I can't help but let my eyes wonder to Liza.

She feels my stare and looks back.

She looks, void of any emotion.

Just a blank stare.

God, what's her problem!

She's the one who keeps hurting me like I have no feelings why is she just indifferent about it!

For the rest of the table read I just look at my phone, to avoid making eye contact with her.

Just as everyone was finishing up I get a text.

Liza- meet me at my trailer in 10 minutes. 

Why. I replied

Liza- I'll see you in 10 minutes

I look up and she's already gone.

Fuck it I guess I'll just see what she has to say.

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Waving to the bald man he simply nods and looks away.

Before I can even knock on the door Liza opens it and drags me in.

Not sure what to do with myself
I just stand there.

"Go on, tell me what the problem is"  Liza starts off sitting on her couch.

"What do you mean" I reply back lying

"Callie cut the bullshit, you've been moping around all day, so go on, tell me what's up" she said back in a bored tone

She's infuriating, you know what fine.

"Liza you keep rejecting me and then wanting me, I'm getting whiplash and I'm so tired of the back and forth I just don't understand what you get out of doing stuff like this" I said back still standing there. 

She looks at me thoughtfully and stands up.

"Callie, I think your expecting to much from me" she says looking me in the eyes.

"What, to treat me like a human being is expecting to much?!" I reply I bit loudly throwing my hand up in the air.

"Callie you want a relationship, that's something that I don't do I'm sorry if that's not enough for you!" Liza shoots back with attitude.

"You know what Liza, I did want a relationship with you, because you were smart, and funny and charming, and so so beautiful. But not anymore, your just a asshole" I said ready to walk out of the door.

"Callie, wait" she says with a sigh.

"What" I say back not bothering to look at her.

With a look of frustration she shoots back aggressively

"Callie I like you...that's not normal for me okay? I'm confused and I don't know how to go about it but that doesn't mean I don't want you because I do."

"I'm just not ready for a relationship okay? Give me some time" she adds stepping closer.

I know I should stand my ground, but she said she likes me.

Liza Hawks likes me.

"How about this, you come to meet my family, were all going to dinner tonight since they're only in town for a little while."

"You want me to meet your family" I blurt out in disbelief

"That's a very relationship thing to do" I add.

"Yea well I'm introducing you as my friend so not to relationshipy" she says backing up and sitting back down.

Well that kinda stung, but I mean it's still a gesture. I gotta take what I can get with her.

"Okay, I'll come" I say slightly smiling.

"But you have to stop being an asshole so much"

"Deal" she says half smiling

I go over to her and lean down so we're face to face.

"Can I kiss you?" I ask in a low voice.

"You don't have to ask" she whispered back.

And I lean in sealing my fate.